Are you Miracle Whip or Mayonnaise?

I have both in my refrigerator but the mayonnaise is way past its expiration date. I prefer Miracle Whip but it doesn't bother me to use mayo.

I have friends that take this argument more seriously than politics. One day I was cooking at one of their houses. I was doing the cooking and they were doing the buying.

My friend - a female - calls and tells me "you know I love you Tiger Ree, but I just couldn't bring myself to buy Miracle Whip at the grocery store. If you want it you will have to bring some from home or stop and get some on your way." I was like WTF but knowing her for as long as I had I knew she dead serious.

Her brother is the same way and won't even say Miracle Whip. He calls it "SALAD DRESSING". His wife prefers MW and buys it. He keeps putting it in the very bottom shelf of the refrigerator door. His wife has accused him of throwing it away before.

Another friend in Houston had tried unsuccessfully to make a sauce his mother would make to eat with seafood. His was okay but just not quite like his mom's. I was at his house the day he called to verify the recipe. During the conversation he got a weird look on his face and said "but ya'll hate miracle whip." She told him that yeah they do but the sauce only tastes right with MW and that was the recipe she was given. She must have bought it, used it once for the sauce, and thrown it away every time. I spent a lot of time at their house growing up, like miracle whip and never saw any in their house.