Have you ever shacked up with the hottest chick in the trailer park?

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Have you ever shacked up with the hottest chick in the trailer park?

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No, but a few buddies did. They wound up getting the clap.

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Definitely smokes too many cigarettes..

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Nothing beats getting a blowjob from a trailer park gal with a few teeth missing that likes to smoke menthol cigarettes. It gives your peen a nice ashtray and minty fresh scent.

Didn't shack up with her but my junior and senior year in high school I was more or less a drug mule for a dealer on the west side of Atlanta - he would front me pot and I would sale it to folks in Cobb and Douglas counties who were skeered to cross the Chattahoochee river and buy directly from the wholesaler. It was pretty lucrative for a kid.

One of my main sources of income was a trailer park just west of Dobbins AFB. This was a pretty dodgy area in the early 1980s. The lady I sold to was about 25 years old (I was 16 and 17) and lived with her father who was a Dilaudid junkie and spent his days shooting up, drinking smirnoffs and picking a guitar. Just the sort of person a 17 year wannabe gangsta would find fascinating. Anyway this woman was trailer park hot...about 5'2, maybe 120, 130,,,just chunky enough to be hot in that renaissance art way. Blonde, nearly about perfect figure, and eyes remarkably similar to those of that Afghan girl from the cover of Time...the epitome of "the eyes of age" - every time I saw them I thought of Mr. Bojangles. I am certain she was, in addition to a drug dealer, also a "working girl", but not a very good one because she could have easily gotten the pound or so of rag weed I would bring her every week in exchange for the carnal knowledge she provided me. For a horny 17 year old it was the ideal situation - not healthy in any way. certainly not morally, but man we (me anyway) had a BIG time.

She wound up going to jail for writing prescriptions...it was inevitable. I ran into her about a year before I met my wife. She was working at a Waffle House on I20. Still trailer park hot although the jail diet and a kid had added about 30 pounds. Still had those eyes and knew more about sex than the editors at Penthouse Forum. I like to think she is now a good Christian woman and a pillar of the community somewhere around Paulding County or maybe Villa Rica....someone's granny with secrets they'd never imagine.

I was in an on again off again situation with the trailer park hotty for years. We had a daughter together, and almost got married once.

The problem was she would break up with me every time I went to jail even when it was something not a big deal like growing dope to feed my family… which is illegal but also kind of not illegal. It was an awkwardly situation for sure. Even when we were broken up she’d come by my car a few times a week to get drunk or bang.

One time when I was in the drunk tank with my dad she got knocked up by the assistant trailer park supervisor. She got that baby adopted which sucked cause I wanted more kids even though that one wasnt borndt by me it was still kind of my baby by birthing.

Anyway, right after our gramson got borndt, and after I was recovering from a gunshot wound to the head she bolted the park to be Tom Arnold’s nanny.

Probably got the herpes

pawpaw is that you?

In the words of Wade Reeves

“Trashy turns me on!”

Growing up, I remember my brother had a girlfriend and he would show me pictures of her and I guess the younger me thought she was pretty, but one day he was "taking me somewhere".. but he ended up using that as an excuse to go see his girlfriend and it was the first time I ever been to a trailer park. This is where things get interesting..

So he told my mom he was taking me to somewhere.. Maybe get an ice cream or something. For context, he is 10 years older than me so when I was 6, he was 16 with a drivers license.. And while I don't know the exact age, it had to be around this age, give or take a few.

Anyway, so this dumbass goes to the girls family trailer and everyone in there that day was probably smoking because, when he brings me home my mom could smell the cigarette smoke. Now he had coached me on how not to say where we went so he sticks to his story, but when my mom asked why I smelled like cigarette smoke I told her that we went see his girlfriend and everyone was smoking..

When I answered, I guess it didn't register with me that by answering that question I would be saying where we went. My brother gets mad at me and I don't know the exact quote, its one of those stories you sort of remember because it has been told several times.. So I guess I remember the stories more than this situation, but evidently my mom told him if he was going to be mad, be mad at himself because he was stupid enough to depend on someone my age to keep his story together, but at the time I am sure that young gal was likely the talk of the trailer park.

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This is where things get interesting..

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