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Recommendation for a pistol for my wife to carry in her purse.

Posted on 12/17/25 at 7:52 pm
Posted by Earthquake 88
Mobile
Member since Jan 2010
3311 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 7:52 pm
My wife is 65. I carry a P365 XL. We live in a relatively safe area in Daphne, AL, and she's always declined when I suggested she conceal carry. Well a few things have happened lately where she is now more open to carrying a pistol for protection. I am by no means an expert on this stuff. My concealed weapon is an Sig P365 XL. Bought the pistol years ago because my 78 year old dad was carrying one. I would take her to a gun shop to look them over, but I would prefer to just come home with one and set her up with an instructor to teach her how to properly utilize the weapon. Thanks in advance for any recommendations offered.
Posted by cgrand
HAMMOND
Member since Oct 2009
46691 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 7:54 pm to
J frame revolver is a popular choice for that
Posted by KemoSabe65
70605
Member since Mar 2018
6406 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:07 pm to
Wife carries an air weight s&w in her purse.
Posted by Cleathecat
Houston
Member since Feb 2021
1567 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:17 pm to
Mine carries a Shield EZ 380, she loves that thing and I gotta admit its a cool little gun.
Posted by TigerChick2018
Mobile, AL
Member since Jun 2018
365 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:19 pm to
I carry a Glock 43 with a Crimson Trace and it’s great!!!!
Posted by Timmayy
Houston
Member since Mar 2016
1668 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:28 pm to
Depends on the size of the purse I guess. Jframe is one of my concealed carry guns but not exacly a beginner gun. Much less a 65 year old woman’s beginner gun.

Maybe one of the larger framed semiauto 380s?

The LCP max is very cool but I haven’t personally shot one to know how easily it shoots being as small as it is.

Glock 42 is one of the larger framed 380s but may be too large for purse carry. The same can probably be said for the 380 version of the 365
Posted by lsufan1971
Zachary
Member since Nov 2003
23749 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:41 pm to
A Ruger LCR has a little bit more rubber grip than most J frames. My wife has one and prefers shooting it over my J frames. The recoil is more manageable with the LCR.
Posted by DownshiftAndFloorIt
Here
Member since Jan 2011
71067 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:44 pm to
I really like that LCR .22 magnum

.22 mag is an under-utilized self defense caliber
Posted by ecb
Member since Jul 2010
10097 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 8:48 pm to
If she doesn't want to carry it, you are just wasting your money..
Posted by LSUDUCKMAN67
DTB
Member since Sep 2020
1576 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:03 pm to
My wife carries a s&W 38 special hammerless. Very simple just gotta point and shoot.no worries of jamming. Can get multiple rounds and low recoil rounds as well.

I tell her to point and shoot and don’t stop until u hear click.
Posted by Tigerpaw123
Louisiana
Member since Mar 2007
17762 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:06 pm to
Lady Smith

Posted by Earthquake 88
Mobile
Member since Jan 2010
3311 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:14 pm to
quote:

f she doesn't want to carry it, you are just wasting your money..


Agreed, but she’s now more open to the idea. She will grant me this request. It’s past time. Day by day unfortunately the world is getting crazier. Around July a man got into it with a store employee at the local Daphne Walmart because he was open carrying. This idiot walks outside and shoots a hole into the wall out front at the Walmart. That kind of stuff doesn’t go on around here. In Mobile you can have a million dollar home and two blocks down there are rough neighborhoods. It’s honestly getting rough out there.
Posted by Earthquake 88
Mobile
Member since Jan 2010
3311 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:17 pm to
quote:

My wife carries a s&W 38 special hammerless. Very simple just gotta point and shoot.no worries of jamming. Can get multiple rounds and low recoil rounds as well. I tell her to point and shoot and don’t stop until u hear click.


This sounds like the best option. No thinking just point and shoot.
Posted by Ncook
Member since Feb 2019
736 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:43 pm to
The last three posters have answered your question.

Great choice if she will carry it.

See if store will let her shoot a few rounds with it.
Posted by Ncook
Member since Feb 2019
736 posts
Posted on 12/17/25 at 9:43 pm to
The last three posters have answered your question.

Great choice if she will carry it.

See if store will let her shoot a few rounds with it.
Posted by moe1967
South Louisiana
Member since Jul 2023
310 posts
Posted on 12/18/25 at 5:57 am to
Just my opinion, but I would not go less than a 9 mil. or something similar.

Take her to the range and have her shoot about 500 rds through your 365.
Posted by Timmayy
Houston
Member since Mar 2016
1668 posts
Posted on 12/18/25 at 6:10 am to
I honestly believe all these people recommending small revolvers will have a tough time shoot one at a range at 7 yards but hey maybe I’m wrong. I just know I shot pistols a good bit more than most when I was competing and I was not naturally easily able to shoot a revolver well. There’s not much to hang onto they recoil a lot making follow up shots tough especially if you don’t have a good purchase on the gun.


I cannot stress how much these guns are not a beginners guns. They have fairly heavy very long trigger pulls. That can easily be short stroked.


Just think hard before handing her the revolver. If you ever actually go teach her how to shoot it it may be a bad experience.

I would wager a lot of these guys saying they gave it to their wife have never actually had their wife shoot the gun or if they did I’d be willing to be she didn’t shoot it 50 times.

Having a gun doesn’t mean you’re immediately safer. It can get you into larger problems if you don’t have a good grasp on when and how to use it.


All this said I absolutely love my jframe but my wife despises it (this is the norm). My wife enjoys shooting her glock 19 however.
Posted by RetiredSaintsLsuFan
NW Arkansas
Member since Jun 2020
2188 posts
Posted on 12/18/25 at 6:13 am to
I am in the same position with my wife. I bought a S&W M&P 9mm shield for her, but she does not care for it. I am thinking a snub nose revolver would be simpler. I am checking into getting a CC permit and I would like her to get one also.
Posted by baldona
Florida
Member since Feb 2016
23416 posts
Posted on 12/18/25 at 6:19 am to
I’ve always been of the opinion that if a semi auto is too complicated for someone to conceal carry than they shouldn’t be CCing, they need to practice more. If they want a revolver so badly, that’s fine. But still practice a lot with it.

Too many people suggest a revolver so someone doesn’t have to ‘practice’ to use it. This is just plain terrible advice when the only time you’d use a tool is a high stress situation to likely save your life, you need to be very well practiced with it.

ETA: don’t have her practice in the middle of the day on a nice spring day in work out clothes. Have her practice in conditions she’d be likely to use it. Put on a dress and sweater and shoot in the dark, if possible. You want it to be instinctual. She will also then feel much much much more comfortable carrying it
This post was edited on 12/18/25 at 6:22 am
Posted by Timmayy
Houston
Member since Mar 2016
1668 posts
Posted on 12/18/25 at 6:33 am to
I can almost promise she won’t like a snub nose more going smaller in a gun rarely makes it more pleasant tj shoot. The micro compact 9mm are right at the cusp of starting to get snappy.

She may like a larger size 9 or a similarly sized 380

What specially does she not like about the shield I guess I should ask
This post was edited on 12/18/25 at 6:36 am
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