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You ever feel like dating apps have ruined a generation?
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:05 am
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:05 am
I was talking to a friend of mine. He's going through a breakup and was a bit down. He's younger than me (28), and said something I (42) never really thought about, and that dating apps have really ruined things for his generation, and yet they are dependent upon them.
It got me thinking when I was in high school and college (1998 - 2006), I met people organically and through friends or events. I went home thinking about that person and then making effort to talk to that person, and then date.
Today, younger folks go on a date and then go home to their dating apps, swiping at hundreds of profiles. Instead of thinking this person they met is worth investing in, they peruse a menu of other singles and continuously search for if the grass is greener. And many times they likely mess up a good connection because they are always on the hunt.
I use the word "they" in general terms, as I know not everyone is like this, but it was an interesting observation hearing it come from someone who was raised with dating apps as the norm. I experienced it briefly in 2014 when I went through a divorce, and it was really overwhelming as someone who had never used them before. And still, I met my second wife through mutual friends.
It got me thinking when I was in high school and college (1998 - 2006), I met people organically and through friends or events. I went home thinking about that person and then making effort to talk to that person, and then date.
Today, younger folks go on a date and then go home to their dating apps, swiping at hundreds of profiles. Instead of thinking this person they met is worth investing in, they peruse a menu of other singles and continuously search for if the grass is greener. And many times they likely mess up a good connection because they are always on the hunt.
I use the word "they" in general terms, as I know not everyone is like this, but it was an interesting observation hearing it come from someone who was raised with dating apps as the norm. I experienced it briefly in 2014 when I went through a divorce, and it was really overwhelming as someone who had never used them before. And still, I met my second wife through mutual friends.
44
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:06 am to LSUZombie
quote:
You ever feel like dating apps have ruined a generation?
Can’t be worse than a Vietnam war or a Great Depression
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:06 am to LSUZombie
No, I think people being fat, lazy, and stupid has ruined a generation. These dudes want to be 5’8 235 and wonder why women don’t like them
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:07 am to LSUZombie
I’m swiping left on this thread.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:11 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
No, I think people being fat, lazy, and stupid has ruined a generation
Well, that didn't ruin the boomers
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:16 am to LSUZombie
It’s pure dopamine hits. And you know who LOVE dopamine hits? Single women.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:19 am to LSUZombie
I've never been on a dating app and I'm glad I didn't grow up in this era as well. I was in high school and college from 1992-2000.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:20 am to LSUZombie
not sure it's the dating apps alone, more like the cell phones and texting
a buddy of mine had two teen sons and he commented that one of them had a "date" with a girl that was 100% online and they'd sometimes sit in his living room and text back and forth instead of, you know, actually talking
yeah I told him his son is gay
a buddy of mine had two teen sons and he commented that one of them had a "date" with a girl that was 100% online and they'd sometimes sit in his living room and text back and forth instead of, you know, actually talking
yeah I told him his son is gay
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:20 am to fallguy_1978
quote:
I've never been on a dating app and I'm glad I didn't grow up in this era as well.
same, having game is a lost art
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:24 am to 777Tiger
quote:
same, having game is a lost art
I probably don't have any anymore, but frick it, I'm old
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:26 am to fallguy_1978
quote:
I probably don't have any anymore, but frick it, I'm old
in the same boat but some of the old sensory perceptions will occasionally rear their heads
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:32 am to LSUZombie
quote:
Today, women go on a date and then go home to their dating apps, swiping at hundreds of profiles. Instead of thinking this person they met is worth investing in, they peruse a menu of other singles and continuously search for if the grass is greener. And many times they likely mess up a good connection because they are always on the hunt.
If a guy likes a girl then they will go on another date, even though they might still go home to dating apps anyway. Women will have a great date and still choose to ghost that guy and move on to something they perceive as better regardless of how well the date went.
Every woman wants their own personalized show of "The Bachelorette" and the amount of options given to them make it a reality.
Its not just dating apps. The dating apps make the lifestyle choice easy but social media and the women hive mind really push it over the edge.
You can have a girl that goes on a date, really likes a guy, and cuts him off simply because her 3 friends don't like him. On the other end, guys don't really give a frick and will only influence such things if they see a real red flag.
Its actually a scary combination of thought process: Women are primarily "feeling" based and can be reactive due to those feelings but yet if their feelings do not align with their friends then they may abandon those feelings instantly without even processing why.
Too much outside influence all around.
This post was edited on 10/7/25 at 11:35 am
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:36 am to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
These dudes want to be 5’8
quote:just get you some platform shoes Baw.
by Mingo Was His NameO
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:52 am to LSUZombie
Glad I'm old and married..... the wife can and still cooks supper every day. No use for all this other nonsense. Hopefully our kids learned enough that they never do either.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 11:53 am to SuperSaint
I do think it’s a problem. People wear headphones out in public and don’t even talk to strangers.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 12:01 pm to LSUZombie
I’m 29, and I can confirm dating is awful nowadays. I wasn’t fortunate to meet a great girl at work or in high school/college like almost all of my friends did. It wasn’t for lack of trying, it just didn’t happen for me. I wish we still had the kind of dating environment you older guys grew up with. It’s just doesn’t exist anymore, sadly. Even just going back to the dating world of 10 years ago would be great.
Dating apps are brutal, to the point where I’ve taken a break from them entirely. Just a complete waste of time and money for most guys. When I meet great women in person, they’re almost always already taken. It’s been very disheartening. I’m just trying to improve myself for now, and I’ll try again next summer.
Dating apps are brutal, to the point where I’ve taken a break from them entirely. Just a complete waste of time and money for most guys. When I meet great women in person, they’re almost always already taken. It’s been very disheartening. I’m just trying to improve myself for now, and I’ll try again next summer.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 12:02 pm to Honest Tune
The other problem is that women don't realize that the mechanics and payment methods are different for men.
They'll write things in their profiles like, "I don't respond to likes, you have to send me a message," without realizing that men can't send messages unless they commit to paying for at least a week of overpriced access, but then the women won't often respond until you're on day 6 of your 7 day subscription, which means you pay for another week in hopes of a subsequent response.
Men also need to learn to turn off notifications, and commit to just checking each app once a day. It'll drive you absolutely nuts if you don't.
Men subscribe to too many services at once, too. You can pay for Tinder for six months, but when it comes to Hinge or Bumble, subscribe to one or the other for 30 days at a time, cancel, and switch. Out of all of them, Facebook Dating is the most authentic feeling.
They'll write things in their profiles like, "I don't respond to likes, you have to send me a message," without realizing that men can't send messages unless they commit to paying for at least a week of overpriced access, but then the women won't often respond until you're on day 6 of your 7 day subscription, which means you pay for another week in hopes of a subsequent response.
Men also need to learn to turn off notifications, and commit to just checking each app once a day. It'll drive you absolutely nuts if you don't.
Men subscribe to too many services at once, too. You can pay for Tinder for six months, but when it comes to Hinge or Bumble, subscribe to one or the other for 30 days at a time, cancel, and switch. Out of all of them, Facebook Dating is the most authentic feeling.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 12:04 pm to Michael Stein
quote:
I’m 29, and I can confirm dating is awful nowadays
Height, weight, career, hobbies?
Posted on 10/7/25 at 12:17 pm to Mingo Was His NameO
I’m 5’6” 155 lbs. I know my height is a challenge for online dating. I’ve considered not putting it in my profiles, but I figured there’s no point in not being honest. I hit the gym hard, and I’m strong for my size. I just try to focus on what I can control in life. Maybe I should lie and say I’m 5’9”, since most women wouldn’t know the difference.
I have a great career in a STEM field, and I’m pursuing my PhD, as well. I have plenty of good friends, and I’m very active with my hobbies, do charity work, etc. I’ve been very successful in all aspects of life except for dating. Not much success there, aside from a few relationships.
I have a great career in a STEM field, and I’m pursuing my PhD, as well. I have plenty of good friends, and I’m very active with my hobbies, do charity work, etc. I’ve been very successful in all aspects of life except for dating. Not much success there, aside from a few relationships.
Posted on 10/7/25 at 12:21 pm to Mingo Was His NameO
quote:
No, I think people being fat, lazy, and stupid has ruined a generation.
Agree 100%. It’s not that difficult to get out in society, involve yourself in activities, and actually meet and talk to other people in person.
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