TulaneLSU's visit to Kurt Cobain's home

Dear Friends,

Divorces are particularly hard on children when the children are between six and ten years old and when the divorce is sudden and unexpected. Children at that age are old enough to know what is happening, young enough to believe it is their fault, and naive enough not to know there is more to life than the family nucleus. Divorce at that time, then, can be war, a savage tearing apart and dissolution of one’s foundation and world. How is trust in anything restored?

Nirvana and Kurt Cobain were before my time. It was only after twice passing through Aberdeen, Washington last week that I developed any interest in the person or the music of Kurt Cobain, who was raised in that dreary coastal town. I was shopping in Swanson’s Supermarket. A sign outside advertising fresh sockeye salmon for $8 per pound drew me. I purchased a two pound filet with visions of eating it raw with soy sauce. As I checked out, I asked the cashier, “Is there anything in your lovely town worth seeing or doing besides shopping in its best supermarket?”

“This town blows,” she snapped. I was startled by her vulgarity and the coarseness that I suppose develops in an industrial port where ragged and wild logs are turned into geometric lumber ready for purchase. “But we do have the Kurt Cobain park and you can see his house where he grew up.”



The great poster, cgrand, had directed this portion of my journey, with his advice on touring Olympic National Park. He was thoroughly impressed by the HOH river trails, which were about three hours north. I was running well behind schedule, having stopped at many eateries in Astoria and northward, so my touring was rather quick.

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The neighborhood of Cobain’s youth is unassuming and staunchly working class. Most homes were well maintained, though, a few are derelict and look like they could be housing drug users. Walking in the neighborhood, I passed paths with a few Latino teenagers who did not seem bothered by my presence. They might have been going home from school or choir practice, though,I did not see any nearby churches. St. Andrew’s Episcopal was the closest church to Cobain’s house, about a mile away, but I have read nothing that would indicate he ever visited. It is said that in his later teen years he would burn pages of his lyrics he did not like on the porches of Aberdeen churches, so perhaps he did visit St. Andrew's.





Cobain lived in this neighborhood from the age of two to the age of 15 or 16. It was in this house that he learned of his parents’ divorce. One wonders how that devastating news came to nine year old Kurt, who, before that destructive day, reportedly had been a happy, outgoing, and talented young boy. Did he run, tears streaming down his face and anger spilling from his mouth, to the door’s threshold to prevent his dad from leaving?

The divorce was a turning point, and from that point onward, his life seems to have been one of torment, destruction, and angst. He continued to live in Aberdeen with his mother until the age of ten, when he moved to his father’s new house in Montesano, just five or so miles east and upriver on the Chehalis, the same river that ran so close to his mother’s house.



A year later, Cobain’s father, a mechanic, remarried and her two children moved into the house in Montesano. Eleven year old Kurt surely had mixed feelings. Like most boys in such a situation, he probably wanted to love and become friends with his stepsisters. But a part of him likely held a loyalty to his mother that prevented him from loving his siblings freely. Guilt caused him to act out and he left that house to move to his grandfather’s trailer.

From the age of 11 onward, he bounced around different family and friend’s homes. While living with his mother in Aberdeen, he wrote on his bedroom wall, ““I hate Mom, I hate Dad. Dad hates Mom, Mom hates Dad. It simply makes you want to be so sad.” These were indeed difficult times for him.

At the age of 13, he first tried that damaging drug, marijuana. It was his first experience with an illegal drug and its damning aftershocks never ceased. Some sources suggest he was actually prescribed and took Ritalin for ADHD at age seven, but this is contested by many of his fans.

His early teenage years were marred by marijuana, LSD, and alcohol use. It is said he had his first suicide attempt during this time. He killed a neighbor’s cat. Vandalism became a way to express his unbridled anger at the world. He seems to have hated life and hated everything about the world, including his own life.

During his senior year of high school, he moved in with the Reed family, whose son was his friend. The Reeds were Baptists and part of taking him into their household included church attendance. He became a regular attendee at Central Park Baptist Church, located between Aberdeen and Montesano. There he is said to have been baptized. He also quit the drugs and alcohol. Life seemed to be heading in the right direction.







On this visit, I arrived at Central Park Baptist around 9AM on a Sunday. Not a person was there. I knocked on the church’s door, hoping someone would let me tour the empty building. I hoped that I could attend services and Sunday school, but I was too early. It would have been fascinating to talk to some of the church members who knew Kurt to find out more about his faith or lack of faith. From the window I noticed a Christmas angel tree already decorated.





Apparently, Cobain got locked out of the Reed house one afternoon. Instead of waiting, he busted a window and made his way inside. The Reeds were not pleased and they told him to leave the last semblance of a stable house he would experience. He also seems to have forever left the Church. His faith became like the seed that fell on the rocky, shallow soil. When the sun came up, the plant withered because it had no roots.

Kurt moved back with his mother, but two weeks before the end of his senior year, he dropped out of school because he did not have enough credits to graduate. He became a janitor at the same school he attended. It was then that he met future Nirvana band member, Krist Novoselic. This mismatched duo’s first venture together was not in music but in a janitorial company they named Pine Tree. It was not a success.

Cobain’s rebelliousness got him arrested the next year. He was arrested for vandalizing cars. His favorite words with which to destroy were “god is gay.” Shock and offense became his reason for being.

It was also during this year that he became truly itinerant, homeless even. He claimed to live under the Young Street Bridge, which bridges the gap over the Wishkah River. It is just a block or two from his childhood home.