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Posted on 5/31/18 at 8:37 am to The Torch
quote:
I wake up with dried blood, cum and pussy juice all dried up on my legs and can't leave because I have no car. Plus she was disgusting, ugly, fat and gross.
Uber.
No uber, start walking.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 8:43 am to DustyDinkleman
Hooked up with a girl I worked with in college, 6 years after college
She told me to hit it from behind, she turned over, and I caught the nastiest smell of arse ever
I went limp
Had trouble with doggy for a few months after that
Kept getting flashbacks
She told me to hit it from behind, she turned over, and I caught the nastiest smell of arse ever
I went limp
Had trouble with doggy for a few months after that
Kept getting flashbacks
Posted on 5/31/18 at 8:43 am to Loungefly85
This sounds like a scene from a James Lee Burke novel.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 8:43 am to terriblegreen
2 roommate stories
- When I was stationed in GA, my roommate brought home some random. The next morning I'm in the living room and she comes out. She's acting all weird and shite and starts yelling at me and acting like she's gonna fight me. I start yelling back (I have no idea who this bitch is) and the next thing I know she lunges. I caught that bitch by her throat and threw her on the ground. I jumped on her and was holding her down yelling for my roommate to get out here and take care of this shite. He comes out, I tell him to open the door, and I literally threw this slut out the door. She started hitting the door for a few minutes then walked off down the street... I never saw her again.
- Different roommate in CT. He brings home some nasty skank one night while I was sleeping. I wake up the next morning and $70 that I had sitting on the coffee table is missing. He wakes up and I ask him if he picked up my money... he said he didn't. Then he turns around, goes back to his room, and wakes up the skank in there to ask her where my money is. She got pissed and started yelling all the way out the door. As soon as she left, he apologized and paid me back.
- When I was stationed in GA, my roommate brought home some random. The next morning I'm in the living room and she comes out. She's acting all weird and shite and starts yelling at me and acting like she's gonna fight me. I start yelling back (I have no idea who this bitch is) and the next thing I know she lunges. I caught that bitch by her throat and threw her on the ground. I jumped on her and was holding her down yelling for my roommate to get out here and take care of this shite. He comes out, I tell him to open the door, and I literally threw this slut out the door. She started hitting the door for a few minutes then walked off down the street... I never saw her again.
- Different roommate in CT. He brings home some nasty skank one night while I was sleeping. I wake up the next morning and $70 that I had sitting on the coffee table is missing. He wakes up and I ask him if he picked up my money... he said he didn't. Then he turns around, goes back to his room, and wakes up the skank in there to ask her where my money is. She got pissed and started yelling all the way out the door. As soon as she left, he apologized and paid me back.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 9:26 am to DustyDinkleman
Met a girl at a beach bar. She wasn't particularly attractive, but after a few hours of drinking she got better. Later in the evening she and her friend ask me to go to their friend's condo. I go and it turns out the owner of the condo is an 6'7, 330 lbs NFL offensive tackle. He's just finished up mini-camp and I figure he's going to kick my arse for being some rando that just showed up to his place with his girls. However, he turns out to be a nice guy and tells me to help myself to anything in the house while he goes bang the friend of the chick I'm with.
I then go to the other bedroom with the girl I'm with and she asks to take a shower. Figuring she means both of us, I start to take off my shoes but she doesn't move. I ask her if she is going to get in and she says "no", she just wants to watch. Despite much trying, she absolutely refuses to take off her clothes or just simply hook up. She then takes out her phone as if she is going to start taking pictures of me in the shower.
At that point I start to get a real creepy vibe about the whole situation and figure this could be really wild or she may want to filet me Silence of the Lamb style. Being that she wasn't nearly attractive enough to risk the latter, I politely say I have to leave, but she refuses to let me out of the bathroom, then the condo. I finally work my way out of the condo. She then chases after and jumps on the elevator with me refusing to let me leave by myself and begging to hang out the next day and rest of the week. Not wanting to let this girl know where I'm staying, or anything else about me, I wait until the elevator reaches the ground floor, kiss her while the door is opening, slightly push her away and smash all the buttons on the elevator so she can't just reopen the door, and run out into the parking lot. It was a gated condo, so I had to scale a 15 foot iron gate to get out. After that I had a 6 mile walk back to the condo at 3:00 am. Luckily, a friend was kind enough to come pick me up.
The night didn't turn out that bad though, as I arrived at our condo to find two MUCH hotter girls completely naked cooking bacon and eggs for my friends. I ended up hooking up with one of them instead. So I guess it went from bad (potentially being trapped in a hole and skinned alive) to good
I then go to the other bedroom with the girl I'm with and she asks to take a shower. Figuring she means both of us, I start to take off my shoes but she doesn't move. I ask her if she is going to get in and she says "no", she just wants to watch. Despite much trying, she absolutely refuses to take off her clothes or just simply hook up. She then takes out her phone as if she is going to start taking pictures of me in the shower.
At that point I start to get a real creepy vibe about the whole situation and figure this could be really wild or she may want to filet me Silence of the Lamb style. Being that she wasn't nearly attractive enough to risk the latter, I politely say I have to leave, but she refuses to let me out of the bathroom, then the condo. I finally work my way out of the condo. She then chases after and jumps on the elevator with me refusing to let me leave by myself and begging to hang out the next day and rest of the week. Not wanting to let this girl know where I'm staying, or anything else about me, I wait until the elevator reaches the ground floor, kiss her while the door is opening, slightly push her away and smash all the buttons on the elevator so she can't just reopen the door, and run out into the parking lot. It was a gated condo, so I had to scale a 15 foot iron gate to get out. After that I had a 6 mile walk back to the condo at 3:00 am. Luckily, a friend was kind enough to come pick me up.
The night didn't turn out that bad though, as I arrived at our condo to find two MUCH hotter girls completely naked cooking bacon and eggs for my friends. I ended up hooking up with one of them instead. So I guess it went from bad (potentially being trapped in a hole and skinned alive) to good
This post was edited on 5/31/18 at 9:28 am
Posted on 5/31/18 at 9:32 am to Alt26
quote:
completely naked cooking bacon
Risky play
Posted on 5/31/18 at 9:40 am to DustyDinkleman
Got drunk with a pretty bar whore. Went to her cousins trailor, banged her. Drank too much and pissed the bed in my sleep. My ride left and they had to drive me home the girl wouldn't look at me and her cousin kept giggling. And my underwear was wet and in a plastic bag.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 9:42 am to shagnasty 2
quote:
And my underwear was wet and in a plastic bag.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 9:47 am to Alt26
I've had a few really bad one night stands, some of them just nasty shite happening, but the worst was dealing with this girl who was looking so hard for emotional attachment.
I'm at the bar with a bunch of friends and a friend's girlfriend tells me that some girl on the dance floor wanted some mmmmmbeeer. So I go chat her up and end up riding back with her and a couple of her girlfriends, alone. Pull up to this shitty trailer and go inside. Nasty, people in there are nasty, this chick doesn't seem like she belongs with this crew. They offer me an oxy, which I decline, and eventually pass out in this girl's bed. Wake up and bang in the morning and THEN she tells me about her baby.
Man, she was so persistent in wanting to find a daddy. It was really sad. Like bad enough I felt bad for the sex. I keep dodging giving my phone number and they drive me home. This chick is really laying it on thick at this point, while I'm crammed into a Honda Accord with like 6 people, including her damn baby. They drop me off and I promise her I'll see her again....which, thank god, I didn't.
I'm at the bar with a bunch of friends and a friend's girlfriend tells me that some girl on the dance floor wanted some mmmmmbeeer. So I go chat her up and end up riding back with her and a couple of her girlfriends, alone. Pull up to this shitty trailer and go inside. Nasty, people in there are nasty, this chick doesn't seem like she belongs with this crew. They offer me an oxy, which I decline, and eventually pass out in this girl's bed. Wake up and bang in the morning and THEN she tells me about her baby.
Man, she was so persistent in wanting to find a daddy. It was really sad. Like bad enough I felt bad for the sex. I keep dodging giving my phone number and they drive me home. This chick is really laying it on thick at this point, while I'm crammed into a Honda Accord with like 6 people, including her damn baby. They drop me off and I promise her I'll see her again....which, thank god, I didn't.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 10:05 am to The Torch
Damnit boy. Good stuff
Posted on 5/31/18 at 10:10 am to DustyDinkleman
Brought home a little slut from the bar one night in college.
Fcked her and we went to sleep. I woke up the next morning with a bad hangover with this bitch with nasty breath trying to kiss me and lick in my ear. I damn near puked
Fcked her and we went to sleep. I woke up the next morning with a bad hangover with this bitch with nasty breath trying to kiss me and lick in my ear. I damn near puked
This post was edited on 5/31/18 at 10:17 am
Posted on 5/31/18 at 10:12 am to DustyDinkleman
Had sex with this guy that smelled of shitty beer and French fries... the next morning I wake up and go to pee and his bathrooms smelled like burnt ketchup and wet paint. I upper-decked his toilet and then left.
Posted on 5/31/18 at 10:26 am to JTM72
quote:
She was still passed out - tried to smash again
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