What’s the shortest amount of time you’ve worked at one job?

I was global sales director and hired a guy for sales. Fired him less that a week later.

Real jobs post college it was 2 years or so. In high school I worked at a job for one day once.

4 hours.

Saw a training video, realized I wanted no part of it.


Sad part is 20 years and a career later, I switched careers and ended ip doing something similar. Gave up the suit to make six figures fricking off most days. It's kind of nice.

This reminds me of the old Mitch Hedberg joke:

"I worked for a roofer once. Yeah I remember that.....day. "

About 4 hours at UPS. They had evening jobs for college kids, 4 hours a night M - F, pay was $8/hr.

The first and only night I worked was in the back of a semi trailer where it was about 130 degrees. The packages just keep coming and I had to pull them off the conveyor and stack them in the trailer all by myself. Packages get heavy after about half way through and lifting them over your head to fill it to the roof.

I was so sore and whipped the next day, I never went back, not even to collect my 4 hours of pay.

I quit a job at lunch on my first day. I was in HS and it was a summer job. It was hot as hell outside and I had to call someone to pick me up.

As my cousin later said I didn't learn what I wanted to do that day but I damn sure learned what I didn't want to do.

I made it about 3 hours at a McDonald's in high school. I mooned one of my buddies out of the drive through window and got caught on camera. Kind of proud of that one.

6 months.

I knew day 1. Tried to give it a good opportunity to work. Pretty much every day was a amphetamine riddled shite show.

0 days.

About two months. Salaried position, paid monthly. This was in 2001 before direct deposit and such really caught on. Boss handed me my first pay check. I put it in wallet. Other employees were leaving and before long I was the only one there. Thought nothing of it. An office full of IT service techs all just going out for routine daily work at customer sites.

After work, I stopped by the bank to deposit my check. A few days later, my bank called me to say the check bounced. Then it registered to me that on pay day they were all racing to cash their checks.

Told boss about check bouncing and he said it was an accounting mix up and that he'd pay me right then and there with a new check. Which he did. I immediately started walking out as he asks me where I am going. I say "to your bank to cash this". They could not cash it.

Returned from the bank and lost my **** with the guy. He talked to me privately and after a sad tale I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Next pay day rolls around and I get a check for two months salary.

I literally race other employees to the bank down the road. I am one of several in line trying to cash pay checks at the company's bank. No checks clear.

I never went back, not even to get my stuff. Instead I went to the district attorney's office in downtown Baton Rouge and pressed charges. A couple weeks later they called me to inform me that he had left the country. I forget where he was originally from, but he had gone back home to flee prosecution for that and a myriad of fraud crimes.

They told me that if he ever returned, he would be arrested at airport. Then I would be called. That was in 2001, never received a call.