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re: What's the point of open marriages?
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:20 pm to ShortyRob
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:20 pm to ShortyRob
quote:
I think my answer to this is best. Write down all the good reasons you think people get married. Cross off monogamy........That's my list.
That's kind of a big one to cross of the list. You can say that it's wrong to see sexual exclusivity as a big part of marriage, but that's ridiculous. You're redefining marriage. You should come up with a new term for it.
1
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:21 pm to Slippy
quote:
How do you get so far into this "lifestyle" to where you think that you're the normal one and everyone else is self deluding?
You're sick.
You're just as bad as what you think he is.
Why can't you just be happy with your life choices instead of having to deride someone else's choices to prop your own up?
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:21 pm to burdman
Perhaps it was the other guy who suggested everyone else is stupid for wanting to eat the same meal the rest of their lives.
I'm all about people doing what they want. Generally don't care about things like gay marriage, etc. But I'm not prepared to say that deviancy is cool because it's "someone else's choice." He can frick all the people he wants, but if he chooses to brag about it on the internet, I can choose to call him a deviant.
My secretary is a swinger, btw. I call her a deviant all the time.
quote:
Why can't you just be happy with your life choices instead of having to deride someone else's choices to prop your own up?
I'm all about people doing what they want. Generally don't care about things like gay marriage, etc. But I'm not prepared to say that deviancy is cool because it's "someone else's choice." He can frick all the people he wants, but if he chooses to brag about it on the internet, I can choose to call him a deviant.
My secretary is a swinger, btw. I call her a deviant all the time.
This post was edited on 6/22/15 at 2:25 pm
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:22 pm to ShortyRob
quote:
Racists exist in regular life. They exist in swinger life.
If a white couple is not sexually attracted to blacks then I'm not quick to call them racist. It's just their preference.
It just seems that these gatherings would be overwhelmingly white, so I was curious if you saw any truly alarming responses to non whites who show up to these.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:24 pm to Slippy
quote:
There are many aspects of humanity, I think, that separate us from other beasts. The capacity for love and devotion is one of them
How is he not loving and devoted to his wife? You're proving his point.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:29 pm to LordSaintly
I would imagine that the struggle is real for a black married couple that wants to swing.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:29 pm to LordSaintly
Adultery once was a basis for community shaming.
Now it's a party theme.
(And yes, we are all potential adulters, so I'm not claiming any moral high ground.)
Now it's a party theme.
(And yes, we are all potential adulters, so I'm not claiming any moral high ground.)
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:29 pm to AUbagman
quote:
I mean the failure rate of open marriages are higher than traditional ones.
I'd like to see your source for this data
quote:
It sounds like you're projecting your personal beliefs that everyone in a traditional marriage is unhappy.
I never said that everyone in a traditional marriage is unhappy. I said that many people are willing to be miserable their whole lives just to hold on to this traditional marriage concept. Are you trying to say there aren't many, and I mean MANY people in traditional marriages that aren't miserable? Because trust me, there are. I'll also say this - if those that are divorced had lived up to their promise before their God and everyone else, there would be many many more miserable people in this world. People expect marriage to lock in that person, that personality, that body, that mind that you fell in love with, but inevitably people change over time. Some bonds can overcome this, but many can't. The divorce rate is a testament to this. Not to mention that the religious teachings that these marriages were based on are being disproven more and more every day by modern science. Let the hating begin, but we all know people that got divorced because they were so miserable in their boring traditional marriage, and we all know someone right now that is in a traditional marriage and is miserable as hell and is ready for a divorce. Stop defending a failing institution and open your mind a little.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:31 pm to Slippy
quote:
Adultery once was a basis for community shaming. Now it's a party theme.
I hear what you're saying. Is it really cheating/adultery if both agree to it, though?
This post was edited on 6/22/15 at 2:33 pm
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:34 pm to Slippy
quote:I didn't suggest that
Perhaps it was the other guy who suggested everyone else is stupid for wanting to eat the same meal the rest of their lives.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:35 pm to LordSaintly
quote:
I hear what you're saying. Is it really cheating/adultery if both agree to it, though?
If you believe that morality is subjective, then I guess not. But I know lots of moral relativists who are happily monogomous.
This post was edited on 6/22/15 at 2:37 pm
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:53 pm to Ross
quote:
So being monogamous means you have to be miserable? Sorry pal I'm not buying it.
Not saying this at all. Just saying it's not for everyone and there's nothing wrong with letting go of marriage in the traditional sense and being open minded about something different. It doesn't take a traditional marriage to be happy. In fact, it's quite the opposite for many people, but they won't get it until their third for fourth divorce
This post was edited on 6/22/15 at 2:56 pm
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:55 pm to DaTroof
quote:
He can frick all the people he wants, but if he chooses to brag about it on the internet, I can choose to call him a deviant.
I never saw him bragging, only answering questions that were asked of him. I would never do it, but I do respect the guy for answering questions and taking the shite talking like a champ
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:57 pm to HoustonChick86
quote:
Well half the people involved are women, so I'm sure it has happened.
I know a couple that are now married because they met at one of these. Dude was single, she was married w/ 3 kids at the time. They "fell in love" from that encounter I guess.
The rest is history.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 2:59 pm to finchmeister08
I want to bang my wife in a room full of other couples banging. No trading. Is that weird?
Posted on 6/22/15 at 3:05 pm to Black n Gold
quote:
I want to bang my wife in a room full of other couples banging. No trading. Is that weird?
Not sure how they came up with the term but I think they call that "soft swap."
Posted on 6/22/15 at 3:08 pm to ShortyRob
You speak of a swingers etiquette. After a slam fest like that, is it proper courtesy/protocol to get tested? How often does this STD testing occur? Like in pron I read its every week or two.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 3:17 pm to notsince98
quote:
Not sure how they came up with the term but I think they call that "soft swap."
Sounds like a guy trying to sell the idea to his wife.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 3:18 pm to LordSaintly
quote:Agreed. I didn't mean it that way really.
If a white couple is not sexually attracted to blacks then I'm not quick to call them racist. It's just their preference.
I'm just saying that if you're at a gathering, you don't have to sleep with ANY particular couple so, if you leave just due to a black couple's presence, well, kinda silly.
quote:No.
o I was curious if you saw any truly alarming responses to non whites who show up to these.
But again. The only events where you wouldn't know what couples were coming would be events like big organized conventions or parties and I mean, you'd sort of understand that will bring a variety of folks.
Posted on 6/22/15 at 3:21 pm to Black n Gold
quote:This is actually common in the swinger world.
I want to bang my wife in a room full of other couples banging. No trading. Is that weird?
There are even couples that attend events like swinger conventions. Flirt all day and then only play with each other. I knew one of these. Met them and saw them at three events.. Drove me insane cause the girl was a goddamned smoke show(wife thought he was hot too). But, nope. They were 100% sexually monogamous. Just enjoyed the "atmosphere".
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