re: What Ways Did You Publicly Proclaim Your Love For Your Girl Back In The Day?

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frick that furry bastard.

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I can't remember really doing anything, but my girlfriends in high school sure did take a lot of my school's sports jackets/hoodies.

It was my 8th grade year, so, I must have been 14 and I fell fast for a blue eyed girl named Courtney. I told all of my friends how much I liked her, but she was so intimidatingly pretty for our age. Trying to find the courage to ask her out was like someone trying to get oil out of a waterspout.

One day I told all of my friends that I was going to ask her to go to the movies. I rehearsed all weekend and when Monday morning came, I was ready. What she would’ve said, I can’t say. I never did get to ask because her dad was in Army, and unbeknownst to me, that weekend she moved away.

I did learn something from Courtney, though. Sink or swim, you have to give it a whirl.

Sacrificed a goat

Killed her fiancé, Dismembered and disposed of his body down by the river. Mailed her his ears as a token of my intentions. I hope to get out of Parchment in only 12 more years. Sure hope she is waiting for me when they cut me lose in December of 2030. I'll only be 89 years old then.

I am a big believer that true love means never having to say, "I'm sorry."

Watched a Wal-Mart employee type in a code for the store loudspeaker. Remembered it and went to an open phone paged her over the loudspeaker and professed my love.

Gave her the green hit.