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Started By
Message
re: To have kids or not?
Posted on 6/16/19 at 7:48 pm to Grassy1
Posted on 6/16/19 at 7:48 pm to Grassy1
I'm leaning towards the not having a kid side (various reasons), but I'm still pretty young so that can change.
The aunts and cousins who ask/tell you when do you plan on having a kid at every family gathering can piss off though. Those people are the worst.
The aunts and cousins who ask/tell you when do you plan on having a kid at every family gathering can piss off though. Those people are the worst.
This post was edited on 6/16/19 at 7:57 pm
1
Posted on 6/16/19 at 7:52 pm to BlackCoffeeKid
I will say that if I didn’t want kids I wouldn’t have gotten married
Posted on 6/16/19 at 7:54 pm to yellowfin
I feel like if you don't want kids you definitely have to have that conversation with your possible fiance before getting engaged.
Be an arse move to mention that after getting married.
Be an arse move to mention that after getting married.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:02 pm to Sun God
quote:
I don’t know if they felt sorry but laugh internally? Sure
I’ve definitely been out in public and watched parents deal with their kids being unruly little shitheads and felt bad for them.
I’m not even anti-kids. It’s just funny that someone “feels bad” for people without kids as if it’s some elite club.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:04 pm to AbitaFan08
I diidn’t get married until I was 30,frankly I was afraid to have kids.From all my acquaintances who had children I determined that having a good kid was a wonderful experience,having a bad kid is your worst nightmare and you live it til the day you die.
I knew so many people that had 3 or 4 children and end up with one that is a criminal or whore or some other problem,their good kids never seem to make up for the misery of the bad one.I can’t believe it was bad parenting that made one kid bad when their other children turn out fine.I believe some people are just born bad for whatever reason, maybe mental illness,brain damage from difficult birth,who knows why.
I was just afraid to take the chance.
I knew so many people that had 3 or 4 children and end up with one that is a criminal or whore or some other problem,their good kids never seem to make up for the misery of the bad one.I can’t believe it was bad parenting that made one kid bad when their other children turn out fine.I believe some people are just born bad for whatever reason, maybe mental illness,brain damage from difficult birth,who knows why.
I was just afraid to take the chance.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:06 pm to AbitaFan08
If people feel that they need to have kids to "complete" themselves or feel "love" then so be it. The high and mighty attitude over it is for the birds though
This post was edited on 6/16/19 at 8:06 pm
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:06 pm to LSUA 75
quote:
,having a bad kid is your worst nightmare and you live it til the day you die.
This scares the hell out of me as well. Especially if I'm the reason they're screwed up.
Not to mention I don't think I'd be able to handle a mentally handicapped child. It just wouldn't be a good situation for anyone.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:15 pm to tduecen
quote:
If people feel that they need to have kids to "complete" themselves or feel "love" then so be it. The high and mighty attitude over it is for the birds though
I get what you’re saying but that mindset cuts both ways
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:24 pm to Sun God
It certainly does... There are plenty of people perfectly happy and content in their lives that don't have children and plenty that have children that could see no other alternative. However you have shitty parents and miserable single people. To try and classify one group or another is foolish and shoes how out of touch you are imo
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:25 pm to tduecen
quote:
If people feel that they need to have kids to "complete" themselves or feel "love" then so be it. The high and mighty attitude over it is for the birds though
I was happy and loved without being a parent, but it's just different. Not something that makes one better than someone without kids, but just profoundly different than any other love I've felt personally. I do agree that until someone has a child they probably don't fully understand the depth of emotion they are tied to your children.
But I agree, some people start looking down on those without kids or act like their having a child makes them better.. those people are assholes
This post was edited on 6/16/19 at 8:26 pm
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:56 pm to BlackCoffeeKid
quote:
Not to mention I don't think I'd be able to handle a mentally handicapped child.
I dont think enough people consider this possibility.. having kids can be a really tough deal, and expensive- but add to that physical or mental disability, and just know that you’ll need to spend every waking moment providing care for that child, as well as almost every dime you’ll ever earn, and more... I think those kids can be amazing, and would probably enrich your life even more than a “normal” kid would- but if someone is considering having children and isn’t prepared for the possibility that they could have a child who is autistic, cerebral palsy or whatever (it happens A LOT)- then IMO that person has no business having kids.
I dont have kids btw.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 8:58 pm to Grassy1
Kids are a blessing and are awesome even through bad times. Love my kids.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 9:33 pm to tduecen
quote:
It certainly does... There are plenty of people perfectly happy and content in their lives that don't have children and plenty that have children that could see no other alternative. However you have shitty parents and miserable single people. To try and classify one group or another is foolish and shoes how out of touch you are imo
Agreed totally
Posted on 6/16/19 at 9:37 pm to Sun God
frick I said "shoes" instead of "shows"
Posted on 6/16/19 at 10:02 pm to tduecen
Well shite now I disagree totally
Posted on 6/16/19 at 10:18 pm to BlackCoffeeKid
quote:
Not to mention I don't think I'd be able to handle a mentally handicapped child.
This isn't a popular thing to say but so very true. Having a severely mentally disabled child that would never have a chance to leave the home on their own would be such a blow. I know parents love those children too and they make the best of it, but that would be extremely life altering.
Not to hijack the thread, but I often wonder what people would do, truly do, if they found out 3 months into a pregnancy that their child is going to have Downs Syndrome or something similar like Cerebral Palsy. I'm pro-life, but objective enough to realize that hearing that as a prospective parent would be Earth shattering. I can't help but think it would give pause to even the most pro-life parents out there.
This post was edited on 6/16/19 at 10:22 pm
Posted on 6/16/19 at 10:26 pm to HoustonChick86
quote:
100% agree.
Except for right now. I might trade him for a 30 minute nap, if I could have him back once I wake up.
New sleep pattern, who dis?
Teething has changed the night situation for sure.
Posted on 6/16/19 at 10:50 pm to Grassy1
My daughter and wife are out of town (6 months old) I’m so bored without her to feed or play or just watch baseball with me. Slowest week ever.
This post was edited on 6/16/19 at 11:00 pm
Posted on 6/16/19 at 10:57 pm to GeauxtigersMs36
quote:
My daughter and wife are out of town (6 months old) I’m so bored with her to feed or play or just watch baseball with me. Slowest week ever
Now this is a viewpoint I find insane
Posted on 6/16/19 at 11:01 pm to Sun God
I’ve FaceTimed them 5 times today. She’s my buddy.
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