re: The Christmas blues are kicking in

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Then pray some ugliness away.

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The court doesn't respond to prayer, even if it makes you feel better. Find a new lawyer, you never should have gotten stuck with the mortgage and the full 20%.

I had to spend $22k to force visitations with my daughter with a new lawyer after 2 years. I didn't see her for months because she didn't want to be bothered with coming downstairs while picking up my son, and ex wife didn't think it was important. Of course, this becomes a prophecy that reinforces itself, because you're 100% staring at the money I spent, and thinking that you can't do it because you're broke. But you *have* to fix this if you're going to be the dad your kid(s) need and deserve.

Your lawyer may not have told you, but after three years of the establishment of a child support decree, the court re-examines it (I'm almost there, so not sure how exactly it happens yet.) You're not supposed to be in the poorhouse to feed, clothe, and provide medical insurance.

A F driving to SA and back (assuming from Houston), it sucked on a normal weekend, let alone during the holidays.

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Your lawyer may not have told you, but after three years of the establishment of a child support decree, the court re-examines it

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Yeah, I’m hoping when she hits 3 and a half years that I can get 50-50 custody and that will also help me on the child support.

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I need to transform my life. I’ve done good with the drinking. I need to get out and exercise more

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Best thing I ever did to change my attitude was quit drinking and start hitting the gym instead. Also started practice daily gratitude. Slowly things will turn around and you'll feel like a new person and have a much better outlook on life.

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On the other end of the spectrum being with in-laws you can’t stand is just as tough.

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I don’t have the best relationship with my sisters. We love each other, but we may communicate once a month. They claim they want a better relationship with me, but their actions say otherwise.

I’d go to the titter, they are extra generous on Christmas Eve

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50-50 custody and that will also help me on the child support.

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You know she's going to fight that custody arrangement to hell and back because of the financial impact, right? Be prepared to have to pull every text message, every email, during that discovery. Don't post pictures of anything fun that you do that could cost more than $100 to social media, they're going to pull it and use it against you.

Oh, and get in therapy with a woman that's not a total shrew. I think I started with Talkspace or other online deal before the divorce, and now I just go directly to "her" app. They'll at least hold you accountable on sleep, exercise, and diet to some extent. TD is a short term fix some of the time, but there are horrible farking people to listen to on here.

Is the divorce finalized?

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Is the divorce finalized?

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Yes

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OP, what kind of decisions have you made along the journey of life?

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Not sure what you are looking for here.

"Binding Mediated Settlement Agreement - Band Aid Temporary Orders." I'm staring at mine right now (Fort Bend County.) Aside from the lawyer fees to get there, it was under $800 to have the retired judge to force an adjustment to what I dumbly accepted out of the gate. It took barely over three hours to fix what I'd been bitching about for years.