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Posted on 2/18/24 at 9:11 pm to tigerskin
quote:
Open casket funerals are more emotional
quote:
Open casket
So youre saying that the family members that chose this option, knew in advance that they would be able to direct attention to themselves?
Shocked I tell you. Shocked!
Posted on 2/18/24 at 9:24 pm to Pepperoni
quote:
How about working with the funeral director to create a 3D facial replica for pre-interment planning purposes for a loved one. It could occasionally wink or mimic breathing for viewers. Heck, go whole body.
I like the cut of ur jib .
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:21 pm to tigerskin
quote:
Where do you live?
middle TN currently. grew up outside of Memphis
My mother is from Baton Rouge. When my grandmother died, there was a point of contention about open/closed casket. Mom and my aunt shut it down and made sure it was closed. Some of the older folks were saying they wanted to see her as she was. We were all like, "she looks dead. We don't want our last memory of her to be that."
Only open casket funeral I've been to was a close friend of mine who died in a car wreck in college. Visitation had his parents right by the open casket. It was unsettling
This post was edited on 2/18/24 at 10:25 pm
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:25 pm to tigerskin
We recently buried my grandfather..the open casket portion was for very close family only and was closed before others were permitted in. I was really happy we did it that way...he wasted away toward the end. He was a proud man and I know he wouldn't have been wanted to be seen that way... that said it probably did offer certain closure for us that a closed box wouldn't have
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:29 pm to lsufball19
quote:
Open casket funerals are more emotional
Hell yes they are. When they closed my dad's casket the final time after the service, my mom fainted, then in my anxiety over seeing that, I fainted also.
Coming from a family of Southern Baptists, every funeral and wake my mom had ever been to had been open casket, so that's why we did it for my dad.
After that day, we both decided that we would be cremated when it's our time to go.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:33 pm to scott8811
quote:
it probably did offer certain closure for us that a closed box wouldn't have
This was actually the one upside of the open casket--but my dad had been sick for a while and his passing wasn't a shock at all, so I think we already had our "closure". I could have done without EMS showing up to the funeral home
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:36 pm to tigerskin
quote:
Why do we mainly do it that way?
So we don't accidentally bury a live person.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:38 pm to tigerskin
My mom asked for family only if the casket was open. The regular visitation and funeral were closed.
She asked to be buried in her pajamas and didn’t want the town to see them. lol.
She asked to be buried in her pajamas and didn’t want the town to see them. lol.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:41 pm to tigerskin
One of my cousins was murdered by her crazy ex husband. She had an open casket, and despite a veil and makeup, you could see the outline of the entry wound on her forehead. Then when they closed her casket for the funeral, her son who was about 10 or 11 let out with the most awful wail.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:43 pm to RobbBobb
quote:
Shocked I tell you
There were many moments when I was sorry I was an only child when my parents passed. However one of the positives was being able to plan the funerals and make sure the caskets were closed.
We had beautiful large photos mounted on canvas placed next to the casket
Point is, family members more times than not decide if the casket is open or closed.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:47 pm to tigerskin
The majority of funerals I have been to have been open casket as well. I agree that open caskets are the most emotional as well. On the opposite end of the spectrum, one of my relatives recently passed and she wanted nothing. She simply was cremated without a ceremony of any kind. I don’t even know what happened to her ashes. It was kind of confusing that she just disappeared from our lives.
It seems to me that an open casket helps family members get closure much faster…it’s though to get any kind of closure otherwise.
The fact is, whatever the loved ones choose to do should be done.
It seems to me that an open casket helps family members get closure much faster…it’s though to get any kind of closure otherwise.
The fact is, whatever the loved ones choose to do should be done.
Posted on 2/18/24 at 10:49 pm to tigerskin
I have never once been up to look at a fricking dead person in their casket. Why would anyone ever do that?
Posted on 2/19/24 at 12:03 am to tigerskin
My grandfather was a mortician. There is no right answer really. Sometimes seeing someone at peace is helpful, other times they look not so great and you are left with an even more awful and depressed memory. I try to think either way you’re there for that person so try not to get in your own head about it all.
What works best, IMO, is a small family funeral with just the immediate family/loved ones and then a celebration of life event with NO dead body for literally everyone else. Let everyone leave on a better note celebrating that persons life.
What works best, IMO, is a small family funeral with just the immediate family/loved ones and then a celebration of life event with NO dead body for literally everyone else. Let everyone leave on a better note celebrating that persons life.
Posted on 2/19/24 at 12:14 am to Old Money
I have not seen an open casket funeral in a while, the last one was a very old Italian man, just the way they did it. Since I'm old I want cremation, only open casket if I can have special effects, such as something that makes me wink, or an erection that rises for a pretty woman, maybe some moans or a Tickle Me Elmo laugh.
Posted on 2/19/24 at 12:15 am to tigerskin
It's so crazy, definitely one of the weirdest customs ever.
Posted on 2/19/24 at 4:28 am to tigerskin
Immediately following the passing of my mom it was very evident my dad was not prepared to make these kinds of decisions by himself because of still dealing with her loss. I made it quite clear we shouldn’t do an open casket. Cremate and have a nice urn at the wake and service. The immediate family had to see her lifeless body once already. That’s enough for me. I wanted it to be a celebration of life and I don’t want my last memory of her to be a lifeless vessel. Well he agreed and it was quite beautiful.
Man, I miss her. :(
Man, I miss her. :(
Posted on 2/19/24 at 5:46 am to Old Money
quote:
There is no right answer really.
My dad used to tell me growing up people who don't do a casket are scared to confront the realities of death and loss. It's easier to just throw an urn up there and ignore it.
I wish I was kidding.
Posted on 2/19/24 at 6:09 am to Northshore Aggie
quote:
One of the weirdest customs we have.
Not as weird as ganging up somewhere after the burial and pigging out on food that was "brought over" by friends and neighbors.
Posted on 2/19/24 at 6:14 am to DiamondDog
quote:
My dad used to tell me growing up people who don't do a casket are scared to confront the realities of death and loss. It's easier to just throw an urn up there and ignore it. I wish I was kidding.
Mine is a combo of financial (cremation is cheaper) and sense (I don’t want my remains to be “dressed up”).
Let me guess, your dad also believed in embalmment? Because that isn’t facing the reality of death.
ETA: Not trying to crap on your dad BTW, in a sense he had a point, I just don’t want to remember my loved ones like that.
This post was edited on 2/19/24 at 9:41 am
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