re: No parent should have to bury their kid.

Redstick
My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family.
Witnessed what it does to parents from watching my parents grieve over my younger brother who was killed in car accident at 19.
Really messed me up because I was a functioning alcoholic at the time and it sent me over the edge for years.
Had survivors guilt because he was planning on going to Oral Roberts and here I was sorry piece of crap why not take me?
Edit to add my heart,thoughts and prayers go out to all parents that have buried their children it isnt supposed to work that way.

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Kraut Dawg

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If you need to talk hit me up. I set this email up for just this reason. Otreachout@gmail.com

HE IS SERVING TIME NOW.... HOPE THEY HAVE SONIC IN PRISON

Well, when it rains it pours. I was at home about noon when my elderly next door neighbor rang my doorbell frantically. She'd run over her 15.5 year old dachshund. I ended up driving her to the vet. She had to put her down. This is the same lady that lost her husband to a heart attack in their driveway about 18 months ago.

She was going to dig a hole and bury the dog. I should be there helping her. But I'm at the doctor.

Mentally, this has not been a good day for me.

I witnessed my 89 year old great grandfather break down when he saw his 59 year old daughter (my grandmother) in her coffin for the first time. No matter how old they are, losing a child is the most devastating feeling a person can feel. I feel for parents who lose their children young.

I can't begin to imagine the pain. I've gone there in my head, but it's too much to take, so I quickly try and deflect to another thought.

I lost my best friend at 18. It hurt a lot at the time, but it hurt the most after I had my own kids and I went there in my head about what my friend's parents went through. I had lost touch with them, and it hurt me to know they had this void.

I sat down one night and wrote her mom a letter. This was almost 20 years after my friend died. I hadn't seen her parents in most of that time. I wanted the mom to know that I missed her daughter and what her daughter meant to me. I wanted her to know that her daughter lived on in some small way with me, and that I carried her with me. She had an impact on me that is always in my head.

This friend was the one friend to keep me in check and called out my bullshite. I told her mother that I still had the regular thought that her daughter would be disappointed with me if I were to step out of line in life. She was still guiding me even after death. I didn't know if it was an appropriate letter to write, but now being a parent myself, I wanted her mom to know she was still with us and that I saw things from the mom's perspective now. I'm sure it was a hard letter to read. Maybe it wasn't my place to bring it all back up. I don't know.

We've since connected more, and I try and find time to swing by and see her every so often. We catch up on life and tell stories about my friend. Then we hug and cry. Then we smile and move on until the next time the universe gives us an opportunity to connect.

A child in my family recently passed. It's been so horrible for everyone.

I'm not the most emotional person, but even I've had times where I'd think or say something and it triggers something and I have to stop and try to control my emotions so I don't start crying.

And it's heartbreaking to see that happen to the parents, grandparents, or close friends who can't control it and there is nothing you can do to really help.

The worst thing that can happen to a person

My cousin died at 32 years old. Not a child but he was an only child. My aunt never recovered. She lived in Puerto Rico at the time. I’ll never forget her bone deep sobs walking up the jetway when she came home to bury him.

My youngest daughter’s best friend committed suicide at 19. That girl practically grew up in our house. She had a mental/personality disorder that didn’t manifest until she was about 16. Her parents were zombies at her funeral.