re: Idiots find 1 million dollars on the road

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My concern if I had found the cash and kept it would be that the former owners of the cash were less than legitimate, would be looking for the money, and if found would probably prefer that me and my family not be able to ever tell anyone about the money.

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That's a legitimate concern

And now that they've gotten the police involved both of their first and last names are public information and thus easily known to these illegitimate people

Whatever morons thought it was a good idea to make their identity publicly known should be fired

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Dude, a full time nanny would be the shite.

We have a couple trust fund friends that have this and their lives are noticeably easier for obvious reasons.

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I send my kid to an academy for 190 bucks a week.

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this really so ridiculous? Maybe I watch too much TV, but I was under the impression that tracking serial numbers was very much a real thing.

If you found $1MM in cash, I think it would be prudent to take some steps to avoid ending up in hand cuffs because you spent money that was used to purchase 5 tons of heroin

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If the government knew it was used to buy 5 tons of cash don't you think those guys would be in handcuffs and I he money recovered immediately?

Do you really believe the government is letting 1 million in cash just walk?? Really

And the only time they really track serial numbers is when they are setting up a sting or know the crime already.

Do you think the government is just sitting around with rooms full of people tracking serial numbers? If they were how would they know where the money goes once in circulation? If they knew it was for a crime the people would be arrested already.

And yea you watch too much TV. If you were right, all the drug dealers would be arrested for money laundering.

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If the government knew it was used to buy 5 tons of cash don't you think those guys would be in handcuffs and I he money recovered immediately?

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I surely don't expect to find $1MM in a ditch, but if I do, then I think it's wise to assume there is a set of extraordinary circumstances which has led to you finding it. I wouldn't take anything for granted, but again, I am a bit paranoid.

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Do you think the government is just sitting around with rooms full of people tracking serial numbers?

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Obviously not. Any such thing would be automated. You've clearly got some tech savvy, I'm sure it wouldn't be hard for you to imagine how an algorithm could be created to flag suspicious levels of expenditures

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Yep. There's basically 2 things you're worried about 1- Uncle Sam tracking the money because it was used for a DEA operation or something like that 2- The "owner" coming looking for it No Country For Old Men style

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It didn’t belong to either.

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I would feel so guilty if I kept the money.

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Yep. every damn time I woke up hungover I'd tell myself that it was my punishment for keeping the money.