re: Have you ever had suicidal thoughts? Or ever came close to ending it?

Seek out help and don't ever for a second think your weak in doing so.

My grandmother committed suicide when my mom was only 25.

It has really big impactful repercussions on loved ones.

So many people will help you just reach out and explain your feelings and what you're going through.

Lost a young son many years ago. I put a gun in my mouth on more than one occasion. If it wasn't for my wife and my father I wouldn't be here today.

I actually had the pistol in my mouth once. Like you, my faith and my children wouldn’t allow me to do it. That’s been over 20 years ago. I eat my meds like a good boy, and things still get rough, but I’m stronger than ever now.

It's never as bad as it seems.

Yeah , 29-0 and 21-0.

I woke up in panic attacks in March 2019. I was diagnosed with religious OCD. It debilitated me for a year and a half. I thought about all the time. I wouldn't wish this on Nancy Pelosi! Ok maybe her!

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religious OCD

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This real?

I actually attempted suicide by shooting myself. Put one in the chamber, stuck it in my mouth and pulled the trigger. I had already written letters to my kids for them to read when they were older and wrote to my parents and siblings.

I finally just stuck it in my mouth and pulled the trigger and it just clicked. It didn’t fire. I collapsed and was in shock. I cried hard for an hour right on the ground where I fell.
I heard a voice that I still don’t can’t explain. Wasn’t language but it was something. I understood even though I couldn’t tell you or repeat what it said.
That was the moment I found religion. That was God speaking to me. I don’t care who thinks that is ridiculous or bullshite. Schizophrenia or something else. All I know is I saw life different.

I do know I’m lucky since I didn’t reach out to a professional for help. Medication could have helped me to not get to that point. I was just too embarrassed and scared since I was worried about being hospitalized. That mistake almost cost my kids a father. I take medication now to help along with reading the Bible and praying.

Bottom line is there is help out there and it’s hard for some to tell someone. Dont make that mistake.

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CatsGoneWild

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Jump in your car you come to Walkons and watch the LSU Tn game I’ll buy you lunch.

Daily. Been through too much. I’m just ready to go to the afterlife. My faith won’t let me. My soul won’t let it happen or something. I don’t know how to explain it. Yes, been pretty close over the last six months a few times , but I always think of my mother and how it would hurt her.

I feel like the world is judging me while I’m drowning and everyone’s trying to have their fun with it. When I was a toddler I used to pull my hair out(unconsciously) due to the immensely stressful home life. That’s how I coped as a toddler. Been through physical, verbal, mental stuff with my father. I grew up with huge bifocals and a big gap between my teeth. I was constantly made fun of just for looking differently(I know no kids meant anything at the time). When I left for college at LSU I was ready to get away, graduate and focus on a good job, deal with my shite just like anyone else and settle down and raise kids the right way, with love, patience, and discipline. Weeks before I lost my virginity I was told I couldn’t have kids. It just about broke me at the time. I got dealt a tough hand. That’s fine.
But I got the nightmare of a lifetime on top of that, which for now, I won’t go into, but that’s what makes me think about it daily. It feels like I’m being judged constantly by worldly men who see me drowning and are judging and seeing if I’m being loving, smiling, and a good hearted person.