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Today in History: July 9

0455 Avitus, the Roman military commander in Gaul, becomes Emperor of the West.

1609 Emperor Rudolf II grants Bohemia freedom of worship.

1789 In Versailles, the French National Assembly declares itself the Constituent Assembly and begins to prepare a French constitution.

1850 U.S. President Zachary Taylor dies in office at the age of 65. He is succeeded by Millard Fillmore.

1900 The Commonwealth of Australia is established by an act of British Parliament, uniting the separate colonies under a federal government.

1942 Anne Frank and her family go into hiding in the attic above her father's office in an Amsterdam warehouse.

1943 American and British forces make an amphibious landing on Sicily.

1971 The United States turns over complete responsibility of the Demilitarized Zone to South Vietnamese units.


Born on July 9

1819 Elias Howe, inventor of the sewing machine.


JOTD

A husband and wife were having dinner...

...at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, says she'll see him later and walks away. His wife glares at him and asks, "Who the hell was that?"
The husband answers "Oh, she's my mistress."
The wife angrily says, "Well, that's the last straw, I've had enough, and I want a divorce."
He replies, "I can understand that but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Rolls Royce’s and Ferrari's in the garage, and no more yacht club. But the decision is yours."
Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm and the wife asks, "Who's that woman with Jim?"
The husband tells her, "That's his mistress."
The wife says, "Well, ours is prettier."…