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Posted on 7/15/18 at 5:17 pm to L1C4
Worked the graveyard shift in a massive warehouse with a big biker guy. Just us. We could go all night without bumping into each other.
I’m in the huge men’s room, 20 stalls... out of nowhere I hear the loudest fart imaginable. I couldn’t hold back and laughed loudly. He shouts from the stall on the other end of the room, “Hey! It’s appropriate!”
I’m in the huge men’s room, 20 stalls... out of nowhere I hear the loudest fart imaginable. I couldn’t hold back and laughed loudly. He shouts from the stall on the other end of the room, “Hey! It’s appropriate!”
Posted on 7/15/18 at 5:28 pm to L1C4
Basketball game, opposing team shooting free throw, my teammate let one rip during the throw, obviously missed and everybody laughed. Ref told teammate he should have gotten t'ed up because it stunk....but ref laughed it off.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 5:56 pm to L1C4
Some old guy ripped one right before the Amen to end a prayer at the end of a sermon. Teenage me busted out laughing. Parents weren't pleased.
Pastor: "...and the Lords people say"...
Dude: *faaaaaaart*
Pastor: "Amen"
Me: "HAH!"
Pastor: "...and the Lords people say"...
Dude: *faaaaaaart*
Pastor: "Amen"
Me: "HAH!"
Posted on 7/15/18 at 6:10 pm to L1C4
My daughter was in yoga class when a rather large lady fired a report.
My wife was in a meeting with her boss and her bosses boss and cut one. She got up and left. She left the meeting and work altogether. Called me and said she was going to have to quit her job.
My wife was in a meeting with her boss and her bosses boss and cut one. She got up and left. She left the meeting and work altogether. Called me and said she was going to have to quit her job.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 6:24 pm to L1C4
Elementary school gym class. We were doing butterfly leg stretching excercises. Kid ripped one and it ricocheted off the wood gym floor.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 6:45 pm to L1C4
First time I farted around my now wife.
It's hard to figure out the right time.
We were still reasonably new, and she was stay over at my place after we'd been together all day.
Of course I'm trying as hard as possible to suppress the urges.
At the end of the night we're laying in bed, tell each other good night.
I haven't went to the restroom because it's right outside the bedroom.
After a few times of fighting it off it sounds like squeezing air out the end of a balloon.
Seemed like the wife was asleep so I breathed a sigh of relief.
About 45 seconds later I hear, "Was that a fart?"
I lost it.
It's hard to figure out the right time.
We were still reasonably new, and she was stay over at my place after we'd been together all day.
Of course I'm trying as hard as possible to suppress the urges.
At the end of the night we're laying in bed, tell each other good night.
I haven't went to the restroom because it's right outside the bedroom.
After a few times of fighting it off it sounds like squeezing air out the end of a balloon.
Seemed like the wife was asleep so I breathed a sigh of relief.
About 45 seconds later I hear, "Was that a fart?"
I lost it.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 7:12 pm to Open Dore Policy
Do you two do it around each other now or is it still taboo?
Posted on 7/15/18 at 7:23 pm to L1C4
Doing jumping jacks when I was in 5th grade PE class. Every time I would jump and come down I would fart. I must have did 5 farts in a row. Everyone in the area started laughing. I couldn't stop laughing long enough to blame someone else.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 8:46 pm to L1C4
Any place is funny when you hear a fart
Posted on 7/15/18 at 8:59 pm to East Coast Band
Hearing someone fart while doing situps during a PT test is pretty funny.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:16 pm to CobraCommander83
There's absolutely no story that's going to be funnier when 6-12 year old you heard someone fart in a quiet classroom in elementary school. Just not possible.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:18 pm to CP3forMVP
quote:
There's absolutely no story that's going to be funnier when 6-12 year old you heard someone fart in a quiet classroom in elementary school. Just not possible.
True
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:33 pm to L1C4
One time my wife and I took a trip to Disney World and my parents and brother drove down to meet us in their RV. I was walking to the RV on this path and this kid was driving golf cart. He may have been 12. When he got close I said “Orlando feel my wrath!” And lifted my leg and blew a fart that sounded like an explosion. The kid whipped his head around and damn near wrecked the golf cart.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:35 pm to L1C4
Junior year of HS, English class with Mrs. Parrish (RIP), an intimidating no nonsense Clemson Tiger that once told me she would slap me in the face if she wouldn't lose her job because after one of her rants I suggested we take a field trip to the gynecologist. Anyway my best friend is sitting next row over right beside me, he let's out one of those with no distortion/bubbles, that started as a Tenor and over the span of about 4 seconds rose up to an impossible Mariah Carey high note. Not only did the class and Mrs. Parrish lose it, but this fool kept his eyes straight ahead, and didn't laugh or even crack a smile. Of course I, the FSU fan got blamed, and this was after FSU beat Clemp 54-7...
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:35 pm to TigerstuckinMS
quote:
Conference call. Totally had the one guy who called in from home and thought he was muted.
He was not. Let one rip right in the middle of a point the president of the company was trying to make.
That might have actually been me. I regularly meet remotely while on the shitter and actually ripped one in a huge meeting while someone else was talking. Luckily it was before they started using the feature where a person’s name would show up on screen if they made a noise.
This post was edited on 7/15/18 at 9:36 pm
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:40 pm to EyeTwentyNole
quote:
Junior year of HS
quote:
English class with Mrs. Parrish
quote:
told me she would slap me in the face
quote:
I suggested we take a field trip to the gynecologis
I'm curious about this story
This post was edited on 7/15/18 at 9:41 pm
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:46 pm to L1C4
My English teacher freshman year of HS blasted one as she walked inbetween me and my buddy's desks. She didn't even acknowledge it. To this day, we still wonder if she targeted us.
More recently, my 90 year old grandmother was guzzling red wine at a family Christmas party and she dropped a series of bombs in quick succession. I eventually shot her a "wtf?" look and she just winked at me.
More recently, my 90 year old grandmother was guzzling red wine at a family Christmas party and she dropped a series of bombs in quick succession. I eventually shot her a "wtf?" look and she just winked at me.
Posted on 7/15/18 at 9:53 pm to nvasil1
In 4th grade class I thought I could sneak one through without anyone noticing and it ended up being extremely loud and long. I was able to convince the rest of the class that it was the very shy, sort of fat that sat right next to me. I always felt bad about that
Posted on 7/15/18 at 10:23 pm to nvasil1
quote:
My English teacher freshman year of HS blasted one as she walked inbetween me and my buddy's desks. She didn't even acknowledge it. To this day, we still wonder if she targeted us.
Was she old? It might have just been an accident. Lol
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