re: Embarrassing things you innocently said or did as a youngster

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I’ll throw this one out since the poster won’t own up to it.

Junction Jack was some kind of stuffed rabbit mascot for the Astros. A group of TD members gathered for an Astros game in a suite. Everyone was having a good time until Junction Jack arrived. All hell broke loose when______ saw him and knocked over multiple children and a pregnant woman to give the stuffed bunny a hug.

So everyone understands ______ was about 25. He is still very embarrassed by his actions. For the record _____ is still an active poster.

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And the little frickers were climbing all over the furniture. That bitch should be watching her kids.

I stole a bunch of spears off of a float during mid city in high school. The guy was pissed and jumped off the float but I ran off and got away.

Looking back, I wish the guy had caught me and kicked my arse, what a shitty thing to do

I could write a book on all the embarrassing things i did and said. Good Lord. I honed it into a fine art.

When I was 5 or 6 a friend of my mom's came over with her daughter who was my age. We were playing in the back when I said lets go see if my mom has any candy in her night stand. She didn't but we did find her vibrator which neither of us knew anything about.

She decided she wanted to go outside to play so I started chasing her, vibrator in hand, through the living room where the moms were ,around the kitchen table and back through the living room. I think I was yelling, "Come back here or you're really gonna get it."

On the second pass my mom tackled me like Lawrence Taylor in his prime. She was pissed.

It wasn't until years later that it dawned on me why she was so upset and embarrassed.

I was 12 yrs old barely starting puberty and I was in the kitchen talking to my mom and my dick slipped out of the side of my tightly whiteys that were extremely stretched out at the legs. She saw my grub worm.....

Watched the Zorro movie with Antonio Banderas and the next day called my buddy peckerwood in front of my second grade teacher to show off my vocabulary skills.

I had my 5 year old daughter at the office a few weeks ago. The ladies there love her so I bring her every now and then.

An older customer comes in that always walks around and talks to every lady and has to hug them, etc etc etc. he’s like the creepy old man they just deal with.

Well he sees my daughter and asks “how old are you little lady?”
And she takes a moment and responds with “when I am older you’ll be dead!”

My two employees eye’s standing there got as big as golf balls.
The old man turns to one of them and asks “I did not hear her, what did she say?”
Employee one turns to laugh, employee two says “I’m not sure, didn’t hear her”

My daughter hears him asks them and repeated even louder and with her cocky little voice. “I saaaaaaid, when I’m older you will be dead”

He just kind of chuckled. The ladies were dying, and I thought it was hilarious.

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When I was about 6 I didn’t know what shooting the middle finger meant and saw it on tv, so I went stand in the front yard and flipped off all the cars passing for about 15 minutes until my dad saw and lost his shite.

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I did the same thing except I flipped off some other kids in Sunday school class.

During Christmas dinner, when I was five or six, I asked my aunt why she looks like a witch. My mom said, "She doesn't look like a witch."

My aunt said, "Yes I do."

This happened in front of both my mom's sisters, one's husband, five cousins, my maternal grandparents, and our family of five.

I got whipped after everyone left, I also got the 'You know better than to say something like that, even if it's true' speech.