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re: Do yall baws hit yalls kids?
Posted on 3/8/17 at 8:46 pm to djangochained
Posted on 3/8/17 at 8:46 pm to djangochained
This is a question I really struggle with. There are good reasons for and against. I spank mine but I think Im going to stop.
I think it really depends on the child. Some kids are more stubborn than others and almost require it while others are really laid back and respond well to verbal discipline.
Most times I see parents lose their shite over their kids its almost always the parents fault because they dont follow through and they arent consistent in their verbal discipline. Parents also do things like ask their kids what they want for food instead of telling them what they are going to get. Parents also fight in front of their kids and cause the kids to have anxiety which causes all sorts of problems. Parents should also pay attention to how they talk to others in front of their kids. We dont think they are listening but they are. They are fricking sponges. I could go on and on.
Couple rules Ive always followed.
1. Never spank your child when youre angry.
2. Always explain to your child why they are getting disciplined.
3. Make sure you console them after.
I think it really depends on the child. Some kids are more stubborn than others and almost require it while others are really laid back and respond well to verbal discipline.
Most times I see parents lose their shite over their kids its almost always the parents fault because they dont follow through and they arent consistent in their verbal discipline. Parents also do things like ask their kids what they want for food instead of telling them what they are going to get. Parents also fight in front of their kids and cause the kids to have anxiety which causes all sorts of problems. Parents should also pay attention to how they talk to others in front of their kids. We dont think they are listening but they are. They are fricking sponges. I could go on and on.
Couple rules Ive always followed.
1. Never spank your child when youre angry.
2. Always explain to your child why they are getting disciplined.
3. Make sure you console them after.
1
Posted on 3/8/17 at 8:52 pm to nola000
quote:
This is a question I really struggle with. There are good reasons for and against. I spank mine but I think Im
It is a tough call sometimes. For instance, I won't spank my kids for hitting each other. I simply think it sends the wrong message, but they're also young.
I'm all about doing what is effective. If spanking works, great. If timeout or other punishment works, even better. We're willing to try it all and move on if it doesn't prove effective.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 8:59 pm to tgrbaitn08
quote:
Why would I want my kids to be scared of me?
They shouldn't be scared of you.
They SHOULD be scared of your punishment.
If you're a decent person in the other areas of your parenting, they'll separate the two easily.
But seeing as to how you as an adult can't separate them, I doubt you fit the bill of being a decent person in those areas.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:01 pm to slackster
quote:
I'm all about doing what is effective. If spanking works, great. If timeout or other punishment works, even better. We're willing to try it all and move on if it doesn't prove effective.
Because youre a smart, critically-thinking, open-minded individual. Holy shite! They do exist on the Rant!
This post was edited on 3/8/17 at 9:04 pm
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:06 pm to PrivatePublic
quote:
They SHOULD be scared of your punishment.
They are scared of my punishment, and it doesn't have anything to do with me hitting them.
quote:
But seeing as to how you as an adult can't separate them, I doubt you fit the bill of being a decent person in those areas.
My kids are both almost teenagers and I've never even had to come close to touching them. Id like to think my wife and I are doing a pretty good job raising them without beating them.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:10 pm to djangochained
I've found that taking away privileges (no disney/ipad/ipod etc) is more effective than corp punishment.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:12 pm to Tempratt
Spanking is a very lazy way to deal with discipline. Creative, nonviolent strategies are much more effective
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:18 pm to Tempratt
I agree with that but mine are too young for that too make sense
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:27 pm to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
Spanking is a very lazy way to deal with discipline. Creative, nonviolent strategies are much more effective
Sometimes. Sometimes they aren't. Methods of discipline aren't as cut and dry as this place wants them to be.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:28 pm to djangochained
Kids need their asses whipped from time to time. Those of you who don't will likely get shite on some day by your sons. I try not to be violent towards my kids and believe that communication is the key to all relationships. That being said, sometimes a young boy just needs to be reminded of who the dog of the house is. All of this time out BS is what helped create the millennial fricks that we're currently dealing with. I'm not saying that I punch my kid in the mouth but he gets it across his arse when needed.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:35 pm to djangochained
When my son was 3, he started saying "no" to his mom. We talked to him. Took away toys. Put him in time out. It worked for a few days at a time. One day I was in the shower, all soaped up and I heard my son yell "no" at his mother. I turned off the water, walked out to the stairs, all lathered up and dripping and spanked my son's arse. I calmly reminded him not to say "no" and he would get another spanking if he did then turned around and went back to my shower. He's 6 now and hasn't said it since.
He doesn't get spanked often and it doesn't work on all kids but now I can't even get that little fricker to say he doesn't like brussel sprouts without tricking him. You'll figure out what works. Or you won't and my tax money will pay for your kids room and board in 20 years. Good luck.
He doesn't get spanked often and it doesn't work on all kids but now I can't even get that little fricker to say he doesn't like brussel sprouts without tricking him. You'll figure out what works. Or you won't and my tax money will pay for your kids room and board in 20 years. Good luck.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:41 pm to djangochained
You should be hit for using the term "baws."
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:48 pm to OKellsBells
quote:
That being said, if nothing else works, or it's a major felony, I flick him really hard on the top of the head. Leaves no visible marks and leaves a lasting sting.
My kids had so many lumps they looked like a Mr. Potato Head.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:55 pm to djangochained
Rarely. My philosophy is that if I have to hit you to get my point across then I must be shitty at getting my point across. So far, none of my kids have had any discipline problems at school, church, sports, ect…
However, I have and without hesitation spank as a severe punishment but I've found that if I do it sparingly then the threat of spanking works effectively. I had to threaten the oldest tonight and he straightened up real quickly. As long as they know you are willing to, most of the time you don't have to. And if you spank all the time then it carries no weight. How are you going to ramp up their punishment if they do something particularly bad?
But, then again, my wife and I are happily married. My kids have regular contact with both sets of grandparents who are great people and they aren't exposed to general trashy behavior at their school or with their friends, so a lot of their good behavior may be attributed to environment rather than our discipline method.
However, I have and without hesitation spank as a severe punishment but I've found that if I do it sparingly then the threat of spanking works effectively. I had to threaten the oldest tonight and he straightened up real quickly. As long as they know you are willing to, most of the time you don't have to. And if you spank all the time then it carries no weight. How are you going to ramp up their punishment if they do something particularly bad?
But, then again, my wife and I are happily married. My kids have regular contact with both sets of grandparents who are great people and they aren't exposed to general trashy behavior at their school or with their friends, so a lot of their good behavior may be attributed to environment rather than our discipline method.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 9:58 pm to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
Spanking is a very lazy way to deal with discipline. Creative, nonviolent strategies are much more effective
Generalities are a lazy way to discuss/debate.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:00 pm to KyleOrtonsMustache
quote:
Rarely. My philosophy is that if I have to hit you to get my point across then I must be shitty at getting my point across.
Yep.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:01 pm to JJBTiger2012
i bet your kid is still a trouble maker no matter how much you beat him.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:06 pm to tgrbaitn08
Some times you need your kids total attention and nothing cuts through the distraction of the moment like a swat on the butt to go with the lesson. Especially when safety oriented.
"I said do not jump from the diving board on top of your brother." "I said do not chase the basketball into the traffic." Or whatever.
Also do not spank in anger. Do it right away before you get mad. Everyone will be better off.
And this is way toned down from when I was the little kid that had to go get my own switch.
"I said do not jump from the diving board on top of your brother." "I said do not chase the basketball into the traffic." Or whatever.
Also do not spank in anger. Do it right away before you get mad. Everyone will be better off.
And this is way toned down from when I was the little kid that had to go get my own switch.
This post was edited on 3/8/17 at 10:48 pm
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:12 pm to slackster
quote:
Sometimes. Sometimes they aren't. Methods of discipline aren't as cut and dry as this place wants them to be.
LINK
Generally spanking stops immediate behavior but shows no long term changes in behavior, which usually leads to escalation because that's all these parents know. In addition, kids who are spanked are more aggressive, and show long term emotional and cognitive issues. Spanking is a short term reward for a parent at the risk of the long term cognitive and emotional damage of the child.
It may seem easy to blame the cognitive issue on bad genetics, but studies have shown decreased function as corporal punishment increases.
I started spanking my first child and quickly realized it was not only futile, but ridiculous.
Posted on 3/8/17 at 10:17 pm to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
I started spanking my first child and quickly realized it was not only futile, but ridiculous
Same here. Spanked for a couple of years with my oldest before deciding it was ineffective. And strangely enough, my oldest turned out to be my wild child.
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