re: Did you get an inheritance? Or some financial gift?

Most of your accumulated wealth will not benefit your children unless you intentionally spend it on specific things for them.

Your wealth will benefit your grandchildren.

For instance, my wife’s father was very successful later in his life. But he never felt like he could spend his money. We knew he had a lot but not exactly how much. He passed away and now my MIL is in control of the estate but she is a penny pincher as well.

She is healthy and still in her 70’s. She has two older siblings that are 78-83 and healthy and live alone.

All that to say - we are in our 50’s. Getting a financial windfall in my mid to late 60’s does not change my life in the slightest.

On second thought, maybe I could afford that TD premium membership I have had my eye on for so long.

My parents gave me some money for my first house. They had to take some mandatory withdrawals from their retirement accounts even though they didn't really need them and my dad offered me some money for a downpayment. It wasn't a lot and I didn't ask for it, but I think it's something they really wanted to do. I offered to pay them back when I sold the place but they declined.

My sister in law has been living in a house that her parents own for several years. She pays to heat it and keep the lights on but that's it, no rent or anything. She wants to buy it outright, but her parents think she'll screw up her life and then have to sell it. They'll end up giving it to her at some point, and when they do they've told us that they want to give us money for the kids college accounts so things are "even". My wife has told them they don't have to, they paid for her college which was way more expensive then her sisters, but they insist. So we'll get that when they want to do it.

I'm sure we'll get a decent chunk of change when my parents go, I'm an only child and they did well in life and I'm sure have saved a ton even though I have no clue how much that is. We're not banking on it though, if we get anything it'll be a bonus. We do our best to save and invest as much as we can on our own so we never have to worry about playing the inheritance game.

Upvote for the Officer and a Gentleman quote.

My Pop paid closing costs on first home.

Somewhat.

I bought my oldest a vehicle his senior year. The next one played baseball so he got the eldest's vehicle and bought the oldest another reliable car. The last one got the hand me down car and now she has a reliable car and the OG car was traded in.

For their college education, I pay for their room and board and food. They both have TOPS, and scholarships, and have loans for the rest. I may surprise them one day down the road and pay off their loans, but for now, I need them to have some skin in the game to see their education through.

I plan to leave them a handsome amount of money later in life. I may set aside some funds as a reserve for them to use to have fun and not think of using their earned money. Life is short enough to sacrifice fun with the family to work all the time.

My parents divorced when I was in highschool. They both remarried and died before my step parents. My sisters and I never received a penny of inheritance even though I helped my dad and stepmom immensely to grow their multi million dollar business. My stepmom basically hated all of us so I knew we wouldn't get any inheritance when my dad died. On the other side my stepdad remarried and then he died.

This should have bothered me a lot. The only thing that really bothers me is one of my sisters really needed it as her and her husband are basically living paycheck to paycheck. My other sister and I did well on our own.

quote:

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Whenever I call my dad and ask him what he's doing his response is, "Spending your inheritance"

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same
mom and dad are both 76 and I hope they bounce the check to the funeral home

As the saying goes among rich people - either you fly first class or your kids will.