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Message
re: Dear OT - What is proper response to a particular dining out with others behavior?
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:00 pm to Turf Taint
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:00 pm to Turf Taint
I’ve been around this before. If this is like my experience, it can come off as more of a power-play then just somebody ready to go home. I was out with a friend’s family years ago and his dad got up and said let’s go while the rest of us were half way thru dessert. Rest of the family just rolled their eyes and went along with it, clearly wasn’t the first time. Once I realized he wasn’t joking, I stabbed him in the genitals with my fork to show dominance. Then finished dessert with the same fork. That last part may not be true.
1
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:02 pm to Turf Taint
quote:bore out his daughters sphincter
Curious what OT thinks about how to handle this 1st world problem.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:02 pm to Wabbit7
quote:
When he stands up tell him sit back down or you’ll put him down. Don’t be afraid to take it as far as it needs to go to establish yourself.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:04 pm to Handsome Pete
quote:
I stabbed him in the genitals with my fork to show dominance. Then finished dessert with the same fork. That last part may not be true.
quote:bet you aren't even handsome either
Handsome Pete
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:08 pm to Turf Taint
My in laws actually stay too long after the bill is paid because only my wife ever had any sort of service industry job while in college.
I usually just play with my son until I feel like we have exhausted the good graces of the tip I left. At that point, I cut eyes at my wife.
The wife shuts it all down immediately.
To you young bucks...
Beware any woman who avoids conflict.
You don't want the crazy bitch who constantly starts it. But you definitely don't want the really crazy ones who constantly avoid it.
I usually just play with my son until I feel like we have exhausted the good graces of the tip I left. At that point, I cut eyes at my wife.
The wife shuts it all down immediately.
To you young bucks...
Beware any woman who avoids conflict.
You don't want the crazy bitch who constantly starts it. But you definitely don't want the really crazy ones who constantly avoid it.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:11 pm to Turf Taint
quote:
Curious what OT thinks about how to handle this 1st world problem.
w/e
I'm not leaving until I finish my drink.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:14 pm to Turf Taint
Based on experience, I’d say this isn’t the only thing he’s a jerk about.
But if you do talk to him, give him a chance to tell you if it’s health related. Maybe he gets the fois when he eats out. Maybe he’s diabetic, and he knows he’s going to crash quick when he eats certain things. Maybe he can’t see at night. Who knows.
Is he an alkie or a pill popper? It might explain the randomness of this coming up. Maybe he needs a snort or a hit.
But if you do talk to him, give him a chance to tell you if it’s health related. Maybe he gets the fois when he eats out. Maybe he’s diabetic, and he knows he’s going to crash quick when he eats certain things. Maybe he can’t see at night. Who knows.
Is he an alkie or a pill popper? It might explain the randomness of this coming up. Maybe he needs a snort or a hit.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:19 pm to JudgeHolden
Maybe he has to poop 
but I am not leaving before my drink/dessert is finished or the bill is paid. If both of those things have happened quit being an arse and leave the table.
but I am not leaving before my drink/dessert is finished or the bill is paid. If both of those things have happened quit being an arse and leave the table.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:26 pm to Turf Taint
Leave before him next time
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:26 pm to Turf Taint
I know of a man who does this, too, he also tells you where to sit at the table when you arrive
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:27 pm to Turf Taint
quote:
Curious what OT thinks about how to handle this 1st world problem.
Stop being a dick and preventing the wait staff and restaurant from making money and other people from being able to get a table.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:29 pm to JudgeHolden
quote:
Maybe he gets the fois when he eats out. Maybe he’s diabetic, and he knows he’s going to crash quick when he eats certain things. Maybe he can’t see at night. Who knows.
The blue pills were starting to kick in. OP said the MIL always goes along with it, right?
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:37 pm to Turf Taint
Just carry on the tradition with the dipshit your kid marries and stop worrying about it. Offer it as a sign of respect.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:42 pm to Turf Taint
If he's payin' that is his right.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:44 pm to Turf Taint
quote:If you pay the check, you control the departure. Right?
it is expected that the experience ends and all depart.
Just hang on to the check?
Alternately pay, and when he stands, say "Hang on {insert FIL name}, let's hear what 'X' was saying to 'Y'.
If he pays, go with his flow.
If a third party is paying, go with the flow.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:48 pm to Turf Taint
Do you have your own vehicle or did you ride with him?
Posted on 1/21/23 at 4:57 pm to Turf Taint
She would excuse herself to the restroom, after which you would excuse yourself to the restroom exactly 6 1/2 minutes later. If she’s got a lick of sense she will be aware of the 6 1/2 minute rule and obviously will wait you out.
From there biology and human instinct takes over and y’all take it to the last stall IN THE MEN’S ROOM. Some people actually get that wrong and take it to the lady’s room and women can literally smell that shite going down…..which means you’re getting taken to the cleaners in divorce court.
ETA….oh shite my bad. Didn’t bother to read and assumed it was question about how to handle another dude’s girlfriend or wife giving you the business with f*ck me eyes at a group dinner in a fine restaurant.
From there biology and human instinct takes over and y’all take it to the last stall IN THE MEN’S ROOM. Some people actually get that wrong and take it to the lady’s room and women can literally smell that shite going down…..which means you’re getting taken to the cleaners in divorce court.
ETA….oh shite my bad. Didn’t bother to read and assumed it was question about how to handle another dude’s girlfriend or wife giving you the business with f*ck me eyes at a group dinner in a fine restaurant.
This post was edited on 1/21/23 at 5:00 pm
Posted on 1/21/23 at 5:09 pm to Turf Taint
quote:I guess I don't understand the issue. If he's ready to go, then he can go. If you're not ready to go, then stay. If everyone else leaves you alone, you win. Enjoy your prize of solitude. I'm sure of others who are not done see you not even bother to move to leave, they will join you and remain as well.
For many years, when dining out with in-laws, after all have eaten, when father-in-law is ready to go, it is expected that the experience ends and all depart.
If staying a bit to talk exceeds his will to be there, he stands up and that is it.
To be clear, about 2/3 of the time it lines up with 'normal' time to end. However, 1/3 of the time it is accepted that when he is ready, all must be ready to go. This is same no matter who pays the bill or drives to the restaurant.
I am sitting at the restaurant alone, as I just called bullchit on this (kidding).
Curious what OT thinks about how to handle this 1st world problem.
Posted on 1/21/23 at 5:16 pm to Turf Taint
Sounds stupid.
I’m a grown man and will come and go as I see fit.*
* unless Mrs. Vader says she’s ready to go.
I’m a grown man and will come and go as I see fit.*
* unless Mrs. Vader says she’s ready to go.
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