re: Daughter’s alcoholism and mental illness.

One step at a fricking time dude.

You are talking about down the road and she hasn’t even gone to rehab yet.

I solve the problems in front of me first before we move on.

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One step at a fricking time dude.

You are talking about down the road and she hasn’t even gone to rehab yet.

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Which means she is at higher risk of contracting HIV and/or pregnancy. Both of which would complicate her recovery and reduce the quality of life of the daughter, the OP, and the OP's wife.

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I solve the problems in front of me first before we move on.

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Why focus on just one? Do you think that she is going to having unprotected sexual intercourse while she is manic or in exchange for drugs? Again sorry OP but it is better to have the problems out in the open. You do not have to solve a problem if it is prevented? Getting anIUD, Nexplanon, or Depo-Provera greatly helps prevent the risk of pregnancy. Apretude is a shot given every 2 months that is 99% effective at preventing HIV. All of those options do not rely on the daughter remembering to take a pill correctly just going to the doctor.

Man. That’s a tough spot.

Obviously this is intervention area (need as many people in the room) to get her to a proper treatment facility.

She’s 19 and so much is ahead of her. Be strong brother.

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I understand this. Adopted 2 kids. 18 yo girl has been in multiple rehab centers since age of 13. She hit 18 and declared herself an adult. I couldn’t tell you where she is tonight. Now 8 yo old adopted son has his own struggles. Genetics of bio parents are strong. We are trying to get him the help he needs but the system is broken. I don’t want him to become a lab rat like they did with his sister. It puts a tremendous strain on the marriage life. I’m still not sure if we will survive this one. God bless you and your search for the best help for your daughter.
EDIT: I too never thought I would be in this situation at this stage in my life. Early 60,s and dealing with this. But maybe better it be me instead of someone else.

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Dude...God bless YOU so much. I wish the very best for you and OP.

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BluegrassCardinal

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Thirty years later I’m seeing my daughter suffer from the same illness.

I would do anything for my daughter, I’d go up on the Cross myself. It’s the worst pain to see your child suffer.

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Not quite there yet with my daughter, 15, but it is painfully obvous we are headed that way. Definietly has depression issues and other lingering mental health issues from an abusive/addict mom. I have had sole custody for 5+ years and she goes through stretches where her mental health is great. Does decent in school, has good friends, but anytime her mom starts her bullshite, it throws my daughter into a quick downward hole. We do tons of counseling and therapy. I just see alot of the same mental health issues/quirks that my ex wife had.

praying for you and your family.

We can connect if you would like to chat offline about our situations.
coincollections@hotmail.com

Mental issues are very challenging especially to close family members.

Here is the honest truth:

The only person that can truly help your daughter is your daughter.

You and your wife can pour all your energy, love, finances to try to make her better, but if she is unwilling to get herself better, her mental health and substance abuse will just yo-yo between recovery and relapse.

You and your wife need to set firm boundaries even at the risk of cutting her off.

I consider myself pretty well in the know when it comes to drugs and I have no idea what “Wellbutrin” is lmao.
But very sad, wish I could give advice

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Not quite there yet with my daughter, 15, but it is painfully obvous we are headed that way. Definietly has depression issues and other lingering mental health issues from an abusive/addict mom. I have had sole custody for 5+ years and she goes through stretches where her mental health is great. Does decent in school, has good friends, but anytime her mom starts her bullshite, it throws my daughter into a quick downward hole. We do tons of counseling and therapy. I just see alot of the same mental health issues/quirks that my ex wife had.

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My daughter started having issues around 14-15. She was having the typical middle school /freshman issues but was doing well in school and was on the 8th grade dance team. In March 2920, all of the area schools shutdown because of Covid. I don’t know is the isolation pushed her over the edge, however I saw a noticeable effect on her mental health. Somewhere I have a picture of me and her at a park overlook. She looks lost and sad tbh. I remember we went to Emerald Beach in NC and she was terrified to take the mask off. So, yea, I think the pandemic was a variable in this problem. The rest are genetics as both my wife and I had some issues on our maternal sides.

I hope yours can pull through, I really do. I’ll drop a line later, thanks for reaching out.

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There is hope Our niece went through this her freshman year and she has overcome it after at least one relapse These kids in college are playing fast and loose mixing drugs with alcohol Praying for your daughter

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Yea, I agree. I had her in the ER the day after. I wasn’t sure of the alcohol quantity and really what substances she had snorted. I do know she had some tremors and nausea and she was asking me for help. I said “let’s go.” The ER, despite being a gateway for a behavioral health unit was fricking useless. I wasn’t allowed in the psych intake area so I have no doubt the RN was getting a partial story. All they did was stick her for labwork and took a set of vitals. No fluids, no monitoring.

For the KY folks on here, it’s Baptist in Corbin. When the next time comes around, we’re going to the Ridge in Lexington.

Sorry to go off on the tangent. My concern was the alcohol stacked with a possible stimulant.

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Screw traditional rehab and see if you can get her on naltrexone. I'm hoping if you can directly address the alcohol abuse, some good effects might follow.

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Know about naltrexone/vivitrol well. I’ve been doing psych case management for the VA for the last few years. It’s great when we get patients in for a monthly injection and seems to reduce cravings.

Sadly, I’ll see quite a few come in for a couple of months, then they disappear. What really makes it stick is when the courts become involved. I don’t know the recidivism rates for people with alcohol/substance abuse related crimes However I’ve seen several veterans stick with a recovery program after completing court ordered treatment