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re: Anyone here ever dated a witch?

Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:16 am to
Posted by Indfanfromcol
LSU
Member since Jan 2011
14900 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:16 am to
Tell her before yall frick you want to lube things up. Throw some holy water on your dick. If she burns run after finishing. If not, run after finishing.
Posted by Barstools
Atlanta
Member since Jan 2016
11293 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:22 am to
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard w/ the Chicago Philharmonic Orchestra.

It was a fun show, I liked the set without the orchestra the best but not because of the actual orchestra. It was just more spacey and jammy than the other 2 "sets".

It was advertised as a 3 set show but really it was a 1 2.5 hour set with no break. They played like an hour with the orchestra, 45-60 mins without and then another 30-45 with the orchestra. My only complaint about the orchestra was, even in row P, they were way too quiet and muffled and everyone would start yelling and cheering thinking the song was over but the orchestra was still playing.

I would probably not see them again but it was fun for what it was. And I got hexed by a witch, so that adds a few points.

Posted by ChestRockwell
In the heart of horse country
Member since Jul 2021
7098 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:31 am to
Lay off the drugs bro.
Posted by Barstools
Atlanta
Member since Jan 2016
11293 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:38 am to
quote:

Lay off the drugs bro.


What part of this story makes you think I was on drugs? I was completely sober, hence why being a witch was weird and not inviting.
Posted by Allyn McKeen
Key West, FL
Member since Jun 2012
4658 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 3:57 am to
Even trans people think you can't become a witch just by saying you are a witch.
Posted by DeltaTigerDelta
Member since Jan 2017
13527 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 4:33 am to
quote:

I’ve always had a “fascination“ with witches. Mainly because of Elizabeth Montgomery and Bewitched who was no doubt the sexiest witch who’s ever fricking lived.

True but she still couldn’t flip the two homo Darrens on the show.
Posted by Beessnax
Member since Nov 2015
10832 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 4:45 am to
I would imagine that the sex would be awesome because she's not dealing with the guilt associated with sex that Christian women have been programmed to feel since birth.
Posted by Bama and Beer
Baldwin Co, AL
Member since Oct 2010
84863 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 4:46 am to
I can't 100% confirm but I think I have
Posted by MyRockstarComplex
The airport
Member since Nov 2009
4911 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 5:08 am to
quote:

Any of you baws ever dated a witch? I'd imagine the sex is pretty good.


Yes. It’s stupid. Bail before you find yourself hearing things like “I can only cum during bloodletting” or her justifying drug fueled orgies as a sacrament and not cheating.

That latter might be more “satanist” than witch. The deciding factor is does she make soaps or candles?
This post was edited on 8/8/25 at 5:20 am
Posted by nicholastiger
Member since Jan 2004
54172 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 6:18 am to
At least worth a one night stand unless she breaks out the Annabelle doll
Posted by NCaddoTigerfan
Member since Aug 2021
685 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:04 am to
Did her perfume smell like burning leaves?
Posted by HoustonGumbeauxGuy
Member since Jul 2011
32793 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:05 am to
If you haven’t fricked her already she’s not into you
This post was edited on 8/8/25 at 7:06 am
Posted by Tarps99
Lafourche Parish
Member since Apr 2017
11664 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:07 am to
quote:

Any of you baws ever dated a witch? I'd imagine the sex is pretty good.


I dated one. She put a spell on my peen and made it to her satisfaction. Unfortunately, we broke up, and she put a spell on it to make it a micro peen. Now I have to sit down to pee.
This post was edited on 8/8/25 at 8:35 am
Posted by Godfather1
What WAS St George, Louisiana
Member since Oct 2006
87733 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:11 am to
quote:

Anyone here ever dated a witch?


I dated a girl off-and-on for 12 years (including a whole year straight - I almost married her) who’s a witch (Wiccan) now. I feel like I really dodged a bullet on that one.
This post was edited on 8/8/25 at 7:12 am
Posted by MeatHead1313
Member since Aug 2019
251 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:29 am to
quote:

a witch


She turned me into a newt
Posted by SoFla Tideroller
South Florida
Member since Apr 2010
39249 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:32 am to
Did she turn you into a newt?
Posted by tigersownall
Thibodaux
Member since Sep 2011
16701 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:33 am to
Go to mass now.

Csb time. I used to work on the grounds crew at Nicholls when I was in school. There was a full time guy on staff that was completely crazy. He did good work but a weird guy. The first day I met him he explains to me how his sister in law was a witch and she just recently cast a spell on his blazer.
Posted by Saint Alfonzo
Member since Jan 2019
28438 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:34 am to
A buddy of mine years ago dated a witch. They broke up but she "cursed" him so he couldn't date other people without getting her permission first. He met a woman he liked and wanted to date so he had to go and ask the witch for his release to date the new girl. I was skeptical about the whole thing, but it definitely was something he believed entirely. My advice, stay far away from bitches that are witches.
Posted by Bard
Definitely NOT an admin
Member since Oct 2008
58012 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:44 am to
quote:

Any of you baws ever dated a witch?


No, but it's mainly because I've known a few. Many of the "witches" (not Wiccans) are really just a derivative of Goth/emo, looking to make up for some feelings of inadequacy by getting into something fringe-y to give themselves a false sense of control over perceived rejection.

quote:

she proceeded to tell me she wants to move to Salem and showed me some creepy but petty cool tattoos


quote:

I'd imagine the sex is pretty good.


She'll have no limits, or else very weird ones (like doing anal only outdoors along "ley lines" or some shite). Also, stalker potential is pretty high.

May the Force be with you.
Posted by fr33manator
Baton Rouge
Member since Oct 2010
133612 posts
Posted on 8/8/25 at 7:49 am to
quote:

May we burn her?



But how do you know if she's a witch?
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