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TulaneLSU's 2023 movies review thread. Oct 26: Killers of the Flower Moon
Posted on 8/9/23 at 7:52 pm
Posted on 8/9/23 at 7:52 pm
Dear Friends,
As we did in 2010-2011 with TulaneLSU's 2010 movie reviews thread and TulaneLSU's 2011 movie reviews thread, I would like to continue that tradition with movies this summer. As always, your feedback, both positive and critical, is deeply appreciated.
TulaneLSU's 2023 summer movies at AMC review thread:
Barbie
What a wholly unexpected kaleidoscope of fun this flick is! Colorful, hilarious, musical and light, it is much deeper than a movie for young girls. Instead, it is a movie that teaches the importance of love of neighbor and justice. Oh sweet justice, how dear you are! When the scales of justice are imbalanced, the seeds for discord and revolution are sown. History is replete with examples, from the American Revolution to the Bolshevik Revolution to the 1811 German Coast Slave Revolt led by Charles Deslondes. Steal from, ignore earnest entreaties, humiliate, or take another for granted leads, in the extreme to blood and destruction. Often these evils start between individuals, and they simmer and spread, first infecting a community before consuming an entire people.
What would the world look like if all peoples in all history had treated each other with respect, dignity and the belief that the other is just as important as we are? Oh blessed Utopia! This movie masterfully picks apart the evils of Patriarchy in a most skillful, playful and engaging way that will offend only the softest of the soft. And at the same time, it does anything but leave Barbie and her cadre of like named friends blameless. It was, after all, Barbie’s aloofness and self-centeredness that set in motion the revolution.
Secondarily, the movie involves self-awareness and self-realization. While this theme may connect with the youth more than the more important theme of justice, the movie is a bit weak here, depending on stale ideas and platitudes. Barbie climbing from the cave of shadows into the light is predictable and does not require any repentance, leaving the viewer with a hollow, plastic feeling.
Hilarious and surprisingly profound, Barbie thus far has been my favorite movie of this summer. 8/10
Dreamin’ Wild
One cannot help but think of the Prodigal Son while watching this surprising jewel. Set on an isolated farm in Fruitland, WA, where the town center consists of a barn and a gas station, an hour northwest of Spokane, the movie centers around the love of a father for his two boys. Unlike the biblical story, Dreamin’ Wild shows how a father spends wildly and invests most of what he has in his sons. This fatherly love is not a demented or inverted love that we came to know in the story of Marv Marinovich. This father’s sacrifice comes with no strings attached, yet this pure love somehow becomes a burden, a source of guilt, to the main character, who does not does not learn how to accept grace until the very end.
One also cannot help but think of the great Heraclitus who wisely wrote, “No man ever steps in the same river twice.” The past is the past, and there is no way to change it nor is there a way to relive it, nor should we try. Instead, because we are made by God as artists, as creative beings, we strive onward on the continuum of time to give something to the world, a stone or a pillar, a letter or a painting, a song or a sculpture, in the Kingdom’s great edifice. Until our final rest, we are to make every second count by working hard and creating hard. The world yearns for a new creation.
The scenery is lovely, the music not bad, and the only curse word in the entire movie is the half-curse word that starts with the letters C-R. There is also one scene with the consumption of alcohol, but on the whole, the movie portrays what it means to be a loving family that lives faithful, virtuous lives. It also shows the importance of humility – the humility it takes to accept generosity, and the great weight on the soul when one does not. We are being made to accept grace. Rejection of this fundamental gift destroys us. 7/10
Gran Turismo
It is rare when a movie’s credits are more entertaining than the movie itself and perhaps that is the only remarkable aspect of Grand Turismo. The director does his best to try to denude the audience of its emotions with predictably impassioned, overly dramatic music throughout but the movie is an utter disgrace. Not even attempts at tapping into age-old themes like the underdog beating the establishment, poverty triumphing over wealth, paternal satisfaction, or overcoming tragedy can cause the heart to flutter when there are such bad actors who have an equally bad script.
Beloved LSU basketball legend Ben Simmons makes his acting debut as the main character, a loser video game player living with his parents in the UK. He spends his days wasting his life on a video game console. At night, he does the same thing. He apparently has a relationship with his parents and brother, but none of these relationships is ever developed in any significant way. His parents are notably absent throughout his training and early racing career, and only reappear in a stultifying, anodyne scene at the end, replete with crocodile tears, awkward laughter, and the use of God’s name in vain.
Simmons efforts translate as well on the silver screen as his play on the hardwood. It is an immature performance lacking emotion and passion. His eyes banal, his affect flat, how on Earth did he land a leading role in a major production? David Harbour, with a U we assume because he wants to be British, may indeed be a Teetotaler in life, but his performance is equally execrable. He and Simmons share no chemistry. The casting was simply awful except for Ginger Spice, who gives us her best performance since 1997’s Spice Girls.
Racing movies usually have engrossing and compelling rivalries. I think particularly of Days of Thunder, Ford v Ferrari, and Rush. But there is no such rivalry here. There are superficial rivalries between the old guard and the “sims” as well as Simmons versus the pampered rich kid, Capa. These rivalries are as thick as a piece of sashimi at a cheap all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. The audience feels no particular animosity or hatred towards the establishment or the antagonist who is wholly undeveloped. What a waste.
The pace of this movie is frantic. We jump from video games to training to race after race after race to Le Mans. Each scene’s glibness underscores a production that tries to cram far too much into a two hour movie. The end result is action that lacks substance, meaning, and drama. No amount of engine noise and vibration, even on IMAX, or saccharine music will save it. 2/10
As we did in 2010-2011 with TulaneLSU's 2010 movie reviews thread and TulaneLSU's 2011 movie reviews thread, I would like to continue that tradition with movies this summer. As always, your feedback, both positive and critical, is deeply appreciated.
TulaneLSU's 2023 summer movies at AMC review thread:
Barbie
What a wholly unexpected kaleidoscope of fun this flick is! Colorful, hilarious, musical and light, it is much deeper than a movie for young girls. Instead, it is a movie that teaches the importance of love of neighbor and justice. Oh sweet justice, how dear you are! When the scales of justice are imbalanced, the seeds for discord and revolution are sown. History is replete with examples, from the American Revolution to the Bolshevik Revolution to the 1811 German Coast Slave Revolt led by Charles Deslondes. Steal from, ignore earnest entreaties, humiliate, or take another for granted leads, in the extreme to blood and destruction. Often these evils start between individuals, and they simmer and spread, first infecting a community before consuming an entire people.
What would the world look like if all peoples in all history had treated each other with respect, dignity and the belief that the other is just as important as we are? Oh blessed Utopia! This movie masterfully picks apart the evils of Patriarchy in a most skillful, playful and engaging way that will offend only the softest of the soft. And at the same time, it does anything but leave Barbie and her cadre of like named friends blameless. It was, after all, Barbie’s aloofness and self-centeredness that set in motion the revolution.
Secondarily, the movie involves self-awareness and self-realization. While this theme may connect with the youth more than the more important theme of justice, the movie is a bit weak here, depending on stale ideas and platitudes. Barbie climbing from the cave of shadows into the light is predictable and does not require any repentance, leaving the viewer with a hollow, plastic feeling.
Hilarious and surprisingly profound, Barbie thus far has been my favorite movie of this summer. 8/10
Dreamin’ Wild
One cannot help but think of the Prodigal Son while watching this surprising jewel. Set on an isolated farm in Fruitland, WA, where the town center consists of a barn and a gas station, an hour northwest of Spokane, the movie centers around the love of a father for his two boys. Unlike the biblical story, Dreamin’ Wild shows how a father spends wildly and invests most of what he has in his sons. This fatherly love is not a demented or inverted love that we came to know in the story of Marv Marinovich. This father’s sacrifice comes with no strings attached, yet this pure love somehow becomes a burden, a source of guilt, to the main character, who does not does not learn how to accept grace until the very end.
One also cannot help but think of the great Heraclitus who wisely wrote, “No man ever steps in the same river twice.” The past is the past, and there is no way to change it nor is there a way to relive it, nor should we try. Instead, because we are made by God as artists, as creative beings, we strive onward on the continuum of time to give something to the world, a stone or a pillar, a letter or a painting, a song or a sculpture, in the Kingdom’s great edifice. Until our final rest, we are to make every second count by working hard and creating hard. The world yearns for a new creation.
The scenery is lovely, the music not bad, and the only curse word in the entire movie is the half-curse word that starts with the letters C-R. There is also one scene with the consumption of alcohol, but on the whole, the movie portrays what it means to be a loving family that lives faithful, virtuous lives. It also shows the importance of humility – the humility it takes to accept generosity, and the great weight on the soul when one does not. We are being made to accept grace. Rejection of this fundamental gift destroys us. 7/10
Gran Turismo
It is rare when a movie’s credits are more entertaining than the movie itself and perhaps that is the only remarkable aspect of Grand Turismo. The director does his best to try to denude the audience of its emotions with predictably impassioned, overly dramatic music throughout but the movie is an utter disgrace. Not even attempts at tapping into age-old themes like the underdog beating the establishment, poverty triumphing over wealth, paternal satisfaction, or overcoming tragedy can cause the heart to flutter when there are such bad actors who have an equally bad script.
Beloved LSU basketball legend Ben Simmons makes his acting debut as the main character, a loser video game player living with his parents in the UK. He spends his days wasting his life on a video game console. At night, he does the same thing. He apparently has a relationship with his parents and brother, but none of these relationships is ever developed in any significant way. His parents are notably absent throughout his training and early racing career, and only reappear in a stultifying, anodyne scene at the end, replete with crocodile tears, awkward laughter, and the use of God’s name in vain.
Simmons efforts translate as well on the silver screen as his play on the hardwood. It is an immature performance lacking emotion and passion. His eyes banal, his affect flat, how on Earth did he land a leading role in a major production? David Harbour, with a U we assume because he wants to be British, may indeed be a Teetotaler in life, but his performance is equally execrable. He and Simmons share no chemistry. The casting was simply awful except for Ginger Spice, who gives us her best performance since 1997’s Spice Girls.
Racing movies usually have engrossing and compelling rivalries. I think particularly of Days of Thunder, Ford v Ferrari, and Rush. But there is no such rivalry here. There are superficial rivalries between the old guard and the “sims” as well as Simmons versus the pampered rich kid, Capa. These rivalries are as thick as a piece of sashimi at a cheap all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. The audience feels no particular animosity or hatred towards the establishment or the antagonist who is wholly undeveloped. What a waste.
The pace of this movie is frantic. We jump from video games to training to race after race after race to Le Mans. Each scene’s glibness underscores a production that tries to cram far too much into a two hour movie. The end result is action that lacks substance, meaning, and drama. No amount of engine noise and vibration, even on IMAX, or saccharine music will save it. 2/10
This post was edited on 10/26/23 at 11:37 pm
23
Posted on 8/9/23 at 7:52 pm to TulaneLSU
Haunted Mansion
I love New Orleans. I love the Haunted Mansion ride at both Disneyland and Disney World. I liked the first Haunted Mansion movie with Eddie Murphy. But I did not really like this version of Haunted Mansion.
It starts promising, with scenes from The Napoleon House and throughout the Quarter. It gets even better with the haunted mansion, which is actually the old Buckner Mansion on Jackson Avenue that is a short walk from my childhood home. Some of you will better know the home from the teen classic So Undercover.
The movie gets all the elements right, but the story misses the mark. Jared Leto is grossly underused and the director digs only surface level into his grave of motives and person. Owen Wilson is entirely miscast, his comically confused character might work in a Wes Anderson or Woody Allen picture, but he sticks out like a plastic made-in-China ornament in a tree filled with glass Radkos. And Danny Devito is just an annoying actor now. In reality, was he ever anything but? The other actors are fine, but unremarkable.
I am still waiting to get my collectible pin from AMC for attending this on opening day. They have yet to return my emails. The second time I watched this film was five days after opening and not a single person was in the theater with me. The financial failure that it is does not surprise me. 3/10
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
The closest thing to a time machine back to the 1980s this summer is a ticket to Indiana Jones. Forget Tom Cruise; Harrison Ford is the real ageless wonder. At 80 or something like it, Ford brings his A-game to bring fun back to the theaters in a fascinating story with great special effects.
One would never mistake me for a fan of the Indiana Jones franchise, and I only saw this edition because I had to use one of my free movie passes or let it expire, but I am glad I did see it in the theater. It felt faithful to the movies from the 80s. It was just a whole lot of fun and Disney did justice to the franchise. I have read that it has been a flop financially, but I do not understand it. It is the summer’s best action blockbuster-like movie. 7/10
Jules
The last movie in which I fell asleep in the theater was Winnie the Pooh back in 2011. That was until last night when. I had debated seeing the new blue bug comic movie on its opening, but because I do not like comic book movies, which are for nerds, I made the mistake to go to what I thought was an arthouse movie. Marc Turtletaub should never direct another movie as punishment for making this outhouse movie.
Ostensibly, the film is supposed to be a treatise on the loneliness and forgotteness of 70 and 80 year olds in America. Such a theme could make for a good movie, but Jules is not it. Its opening, which shows a concerned citizen at a small town hall meeting suggesting a more precise motto for the town and the need for a new crosswalk, was homey and interesting.
And then a blue Asian alien shows up and everything goes wrong. Sloppy writing, uninspired acting, and incoherence follow that opening scene. The majority of the movie shows a man grocery shopping for apples, sitting with an alien that does not talk but can blow off the head of a random criminal, and a search for seven dead cats which convert into a ruby to fuel the space ship. There is never a Eureka moment when all the nonsense is weaved together. Instead, these randoms threads fray and stay in a mess until the very end.
This director has no vision and he and each of the three main characters should each be evaluated for dementia for taking part in this abomination and utter waste. Ben Kingsley’s career is officially over. 1/10
Little Mermaid
The entire review, which was quite favorably received on the forum, takes up more space in this thread than I am willing to give it, so I will link to it: TulaneLSU's review of The Little Mermaid.
The summary: On the whole, I was disappointed with the current film because it feels duty bound to hold to the untraditional 1989 version. There are times when it tries to break free from those shackles, but ultimately, it does not. What could have been a great film flounders as an average one. 5/10
Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning
The Mission Impossible franchise is a study in stupid action movies. I have never enjoyed a single one of them, but I watch them hoping Tom will give us more than just a montage of action scenes. His latest offering is no different from the rest. Here we have another boring story with plot holes larger than potholes in Lakeview.
A full ten percent of the movie is Tom Cruise solo running scenes. It is as if the director or Cruise himself wanted to prove to the audience that Cruise is capable of sprinting long distances in suits with his patented hyper arm pumping and knee kicking motion. These sprinting scenes are unnecessarily long and it feels like we are watching a late life crisis stream across the screen.
There is nothing touching or interesting about the movie or its characters. One would think that with so many installments there would be some character development or a pinch of humanity here, as there was in the second Top Gun. If the mission was to make a good movie with this franchise, this chapter once again proves it is impossible. 4/10
Oppenheimer
The culture of death that pervades America today began on August 8, 1945 with the government sanctioned murder of an entire city’s civilians. Whether or not the oft used justification for this war crime saved more lives than it took in 1945 or 1946 misses the point that the consequences of such a brutal decision have molded the American mind in such a way to nurture a culture that devalues life, and ultimately, over the long run, has cost many more lives than would have an invasion.
Before watching this film, it is imperative that one learn about all of the characters depicted. The film has 65 important characters based on real people. If one does not know the history, the film will be for that viewer little more than loud noise and explosions and a trite, fake scene with Albert Einstein. One may as well watch a mindless movie like Mission Impossible if he is not willing to put in the time and energy to know the characters before the film. I commend to you Brighter than a Thousand Suns by Robert Jungk, which is approachable and more captivating than the movie.
Oppenheimer is really three movies rolled into one. It is first and foremost a witless whodunit mystery and apology for Oppenheimer, painting him a victim of Lewis Strauss’s clandestine conspiracy to discredit and humiliate Oppenheimer, who publicly opposed Strauss’s and Edward Teller’s (Mother called him “the ogre with the big eyebrows”) hydrogen bomb project. It is second a history of the creation of the atomic bomb. And it is third a rather poorly made biopic with several apocryphal stories and an only superficial evaluation of the man’s spirit.
I love New Orleans. I love the Haunted Mansion ride at both Disneyland and Disney World. I liked the first Haunted Mansion movie with Eddie Murphy. But I did not really like this version of Haunted Mansion.
It starts promising, with scenes from The Napoleon House and throughout the Quarter. It gets even better with the haunted mansion, which is actually the old Buckner Mansion on Jackson Avenue that is a short walk from my childhood home. Some of you will better know the home from the teen classic So Undercover.
The movie gets all the elements right, but the story misses the mark. Jared Leto is grossly underused and the director digs only surface level into his grave of motives and person. Owen Wilson is entirely miscast, his comically confused character might work in a Wes Anderson or Woody Allen picture, but he sticks out like a plastic made-in-China ornament in a tree filled with glass Radkos. And Danny Devito is just an annoying actor now. In reality, was he ever anything but? The other actors are fine, but unremarkable.
I am still waiting to get my collectible pin from AMC for attending this on opening day. They have yet to return my emails. The second time I watched this film was five days after opening and not a single person was in the theater with me. The financial failure that it is does not surprise me. 3/10
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
The closest thing to a time machine back to the 1980s this summer is a ticket to Indiana Jones. Forget Tom Cruise; Harrison Ford is the real ageless wonder. At 80 or something like it, Ford brings his A-game to bring fun back to the theaters in a fascinating story with great special effects.
One would never mistake me for a fan of the Indiana Jones franchise, and I only saw this edition because I had to use one of my free movie passes or let it expire, but I am glad I did see it in the theater. It felt faithful to the movies from the 80s. It was just a whole lot of fun and Disney did justice to the franchise. I have read that it has been a flop financially, but I do not understand it. It is the summer’s best action blockbuster-like movie. 7/10
Jules
The last movie in which I fell asleep in the theater was Winnie the Pooh back in 2011. That was until last night when. I had debated seeing the new blue bug comic movie on its opening, but because I do not like comic book movies, which are for nerds, I made the mistake to go to what I thought was an arthouse movie. Marc Turtletaub should never direct another movie as punishment for making this outhouse movie.
Ostensibly, the film is supposed to be a treatise on the loneliness and forgotteness of 70 and 80 year olds in America. Such a theme could make for a good movie, but Jules is not it. Its opening, which shows a concerned citizen at a small town hall meeting suggesting a more precise motto for the town and the need for a new crosswalk, was homey and interesting.
And then a blue Asian alien shows up and everything goes wrong. Sloppy writing, uninspired acting, and incoherence follow that opening scene. The majority of the movie shows a man grocery shopping for apples, sitting with an alien that does not talk but can blow off the head of a random criminal, and a search for seven dead cats which convert into a ruby to fuel the space ship. There is never a Eureka moment when all the nonsense is weaved together. Instead, these randoms threads fray and stay in a mess until the very end.
This director has no vision and he and each of the three main characters should each be evaluated for dementia for taking part in this abomination and utter waste. Ben Kingsley’s career is officially over. 1/10
Little Mermaid
The entire review, which was quite favorably received on the forum, takes up more space in this thread than I am willing to give it, so I will link to it: TulaneLSU's review of The Little Mermaid.
The summary: On the whole, I was disappointed with the current film because it feels duty bound to hold to the untraditional 1989 version. There are times when it tries to break free from those shackles, but ultimately, it does not. What could have been a great film flounders as an average one. 5/10
Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning
The Mission Impossible franchise is a study in stupid action movies. I have never enjoyed a single one of them, but I watch them hoping Tom will give us more than just a montage of action scenes. His latest offering is no different from the rest. Here we have another boring story with plot holes larger than potholes in Lakeview.
A full ten percent of the movie is Tom Cruise solo running scenes. It is as if the director or Cruise himself wanted to prove to the audience that Cruise is capable of sprinting long distances in suits with his patented hyper arm pumping and knee kicking motion. These sprinting scenes are unnecessarily long and it feels like we are watching a late life crisis stream across the screen.
There is nothing touching or interesting about the movie or its characters. One would think that with so many installments there would be some character development or a pinch of humanity here, as there was in the second Top Gun. If the mission was to make a good movie with this franchise, this chapter once again proves it is impossible. 4/10
Oppenheimer
The culture of death that pervades America today began on August 8, 1945 with the government sanctioned murder of an entire city’s civilians. Whether or not the oft used justification for this war crime saved more lives than it took in 1945 or 1946 misses the point that the consequences of such a brutal decision have molded the American mind in such a way to nurture a culture that devalues life, and ultimately, over the long run, has cost many more lives than would have an invasion.
Before watching this film, it is imperative that one learn about all of the characters depicted. The film has 65 important characters based on real people. If one does not know the history, the film will be for that viewer little more than loud noise and explosions and a trite, fake scene with Albert Einstein. One may as well watch a mindless movie like Mission Impossible if he is not willing to put in the time and energy to know the characters before the film. I commend to you Brighter than a Thousand Suns by Robert Jungk, which is approachable and more captivating than the movie.
Oppenheimer is really three movies rolled into one. It is first and foremost a witless whodunit mystery and apology for Oppenheimer, painting him a victim of Lewis Strauss’s clandestine conspiracy to discredit and humiliate Oppenheimer, who publicly opposed Strauss’s and Edward Teller’s (Mother called him “the ogre with the big eyebrows”) hydrogen bomb project. It is second a history of the creation of the atomic bomb. And it is third a rather poorly made biopic with several apocryphal stories and an only superficial evaluation of the man’s spirit.
This post was edited on 8/21/23 at 9:53 am
Posted on 8/9/23 at 7:52 pm to TulaneLSU
Oppenheimer cont.
The movie is at its best when it details the building of Los Alamos and the bomb itself. This movie’s climax comes in that 40 seconds of silence between the blast’s fire at Trinity (such blasphemy and mockery to use Christianity’s God as the site of an anti-Christian experiment) and the air blast. During that silence the scientists, and some in the audience, experience the naive awe and pride in what they have created. And then suddenly a great, destructive wind hits them square in the face, ushering a new age, awakening some to their absolute foolishness. I am reminded of Hans Bethe, who is played quite well by Gustaf Skarsgard, who asked if the scientists asked moral and ethical questions when building the bomb. He responded, “I am unhappy to admit that, during the war at least, I did not pay much attention to this. We had a job to do and a very hard one.” Those scientists, so profoundly intelligent in part of their brain, were remarkably stupid and absolutely artless in others.
The piercingly and painfully loud gymnasium scene is another memorable scene revealing mob mentality. Charismatic Oppenheimer plays to the blood-thirsty, enthused crowd the night of the bomb’s denotation. It truly is a horrific display of humanity, and Nolan captures it nearly flawlessly. It brought to mind certain forums on this website, where users play to the baseness of humanity to garner popularity and acceptance. How easy it is, if one has no conscience or scruples, to become popular and liked. Sex and hatred are magnets in a fallen world.
Ultimately, though, Oppenhemier is a treatise on the depravity and sin of humankind. The culmination of centuries of physics and mathematics is a world destroying bomb. The great irony of us is that we were created for good and given so many talents for the good, yet we find a way to deface, distort and disfigure our talents. God entrusts us with five bags of gold and leaves for a while. When he returns, we give him ten bags filled with serpents. If Oppenheimer had stuck primarily to this theme rather than forming the film around a Straussian campaign, the film would be great, in the nine to ten range. But Nolan Ryan instead wants to defend Oppenheimer and make him a tragic hero. In doing so, the movie is only decent to good. 7/10
Shortcomings
It is only by looking outward from a great distance that we are able to find ourselves. One can read any book, watch every arthouse movie ever made, delve into spirit crystals, travel to the ends of the world, learn the techniques of pith and wit but none of those get to the heart of who we are – creations of God shaped in the way that makes us empty and searching until we find rest in God and find service to others.
Life is not about happy endings, dramatic romance, erotic sexcapades, photograph worthy food, sports, cleverness, or fixing a helplessly broken relationship. And for most of Shortcomings I assumed Randall Park, making his directorial debut, had made a movie about the state of relations in America, a state of utter desolation and perdition.
And throughout this 90 minute film, I chuckled at a few wiry one-liners, the 6’6” tai chi practicing, Japanese speaking Jewish Native American – a real life Steven Seagal, and the movie’s blatant mockery of Crazy Rich Asians. I enjoyed giving the beautiful and often forgotten city of Oakland the silver screen treatment it deserves. But throughout, I wondered, Why? Why are we being dragged through a series of broken and worthless relationships that corrode the spirit? To what end is this torture?
Park teases us three times in the closing minutes. A dash through Manhattan with a triumphant reunion? No. Letting go leading to love at the airport? Nope. Love’s beginning through tears on an airline? Not even. For three days, we are told by St. Luke in the Acts of the Apostles, did Saul lose his eyesight and he did not eat or drink anything.
Only at the very end, as we see Ben’s home, the most beautiful of cities, San Francisco, from across the bay is there any evidence of repentance from seeing himself as the universe center. Only then, when he sees for the first time the larger picture, the city, the other, do the scales of cynicism and sarcasm, two great weights tying him to the gravity of his self’s brokenness, fall from his eyelids. The end is Ben’s beginning. May he walk with the Lord and now serve the world rather than cower in fear and self-loathing. 6/10
Talk to Me
The previews during horror movies are often scarier than the movie itself. Earlier this week, I found myself, anything but an eremite, completely alone in the theater. The preview for the new Exorcist movie began playing and by the time the child walked into the church service saying, “The body and the blood,” I could hardly stand it. I screamed in that great cavernous room. There was no echo. I ran out, sweating and panting, and found one of the AMC workers.
“Could you please turn on the cleaning lights for my movie? It is so dark in there and I am alone.”
She laughed a little, but agreed to turn them on. She also said, “But if anyone else shows up, I will have to turn them off.”
“That would be fine. It is just that all alone in the dark is a very scary place to be.”
In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus talks about to scotos to exoteron, “the outer darkness,” in three of his parables. The first is Matthew 8 where he heals the centurion’s lame servant. The Gentile's great faith and humility are contrasted with those who inherited the promise. Jesus lauds the centurion while warning his tribe that they may tossed into the outer darkness. In Matthew 22, Jesus tells another parable, this one about the wedding banquet where one misguided man failed to dress appropriately. Because the man took no care to prepare for the wedding and dress for it, the host tosses the misarrayed man into the outer darkness. And finally, in Matthew 25, we read Jesus’s parable of the talents. A master gives three servants bags of gold. The one who received five put the gold to work and returned ten bags. The servant given two bags returned four bags. But the lazy servant, out of fear of losing his master’s gold, dug a hole and put it there. When he returned the one bag to his master, his master was enraged that he had been lazy and done nothing with his talent. Jesus again says that such a person, driven by fear, will be tossed, like the misdressed and those who lack the faith of the centurion, into the outer darkness. Notice that in each of the parables there are two groups, those inside and those outside. Gospel contains both judgment and grace.
Ultimately, Talk to Me is a movie about the consequences of sin, which lead to the outer darkness. The denoument, when the corridors of the hospital close and darkness envelopes all, and she is all alone with nothing, not even a flicker of light, this is the outer darkness. The movie is not a fun or hopeful or edifying horror movie – it is a jeremiad about the dangers of reaching out one’s hand to the underworld, the occult, and asking it to speak to us. Ouija boarders, palm readers, astrologists, false prophets who preach wealth and war and security, and those seeking communion with the dead, take heed. The outer darkness awaits you.
The movie is at its best when it details the building of Los Alamos and the bomb itself. This movie’s climax comes in that 40 seconds of silence between the blast’s fire at Trinity (such blasphemy and mockery to use Christianity’s God as the site of an anti-Christian experiment) and the air blast. During that silence the scientists, and some in the audience, experience the naive awe and pride in what they have created. And then suddenly a great, destructive wind hits them square in the face, ushering a new age, awakening some to their absolute foolishness. I am reminded of Hans Bethe, who is played quite well by Gustaf Skarsgard, who asked if the scientists asked moral and ethical questions when building the bomb. He responded, “I am unhappy to admit that, during the war at least, I did not pay much attention to this. We had a job to do and a very hard one.” Those scientists, so profoundly intelligent in part of their brain, were remarkably stupid and absolutely artless in others.
The piercingly and painfully loud gymnasium scene is another memorable scene revealing mob mentality. Charismatic Oppenheimer plays to the blood-thirsty, enthused crowd the night of the bomb’s denotation. It truly is a horrific display of humanity, and Nolan captures it nearly flawlessly. It brought to mind certain forums on this website, where users play to the baseness of humanity to garner popularity and acceptance. How easy it is, if one has no conscience or scruples, to become popular and liked. Sex and hatred are magnets in a fallen world.
Ultimately, though, Oppenhemier is a treatise on the depravity and sin of humankind. The culmination of centuries of physics and mathematics is a world destroying bomb. The great irony of us is that we were created for good and given so many talents for the good, yet we find a way to deface, distort and disfigure our talents. God entrusts us with five bags of gold and leaves for a while. When he returns, we give him ten bags filled with serpents. If Oppenheimer had stuck primarily to this theme rather than forming the film around a Straussian campaign, the film would be great, in the nine to ten range. But Nolan Ryan instead wants to defend Oppenheimer and make him a tragic hero. In doing so, the movie is only decent to good. 7/10
Shortcomings
It is only by looking outward from a great distance that we are able to find ourselves. One can read any book, watch every arthouse movie ever made, delve into spirit crystals, travel to the ends of the world, learn the techniques of pith and wit but none of those get to the heart of who we are – creations of God shaped in the way that makes us empty and searching until we find rest in God and find service to others.
Life is not about happy endings, dramatic romance, erotic sexcapades, photograph worthy food, sports, cleverness, or fixing a helplessly broken relationship. And for most of Shortcomings I assumed Randall Park, making his directorial debut, had made a movie about the state of relations in America, a state of utter desolation and perdition.
And throughout this 90 minute film, I chuckled at a few wiry one-liners, the 6’6” tai chi practicing, Japanese speaking Jewish Native American – a real life Steven Seagal, and the movie’s blatant mockery of Crazy Rich Asians. I enjoyed giving the beautiful and often forgotten city of Oakland the silver screen treatment it deserves. But throughout, I wondered, Why? Why are we being dragged through a series of broken and worthless relationships that corrode the spirit? To what end is this torture?
Park teases us three times in the closing minutes. A dash through Manhattan with a triumphant reunion? No. Letting go leading to love at the airport? Nope. Love’s beginning through tears on an airline? Not even. For three days, we are told by St. Luke in the Acts of the Apostles, did Saul lose his eyesight and he did not eat or drink anything.
Only at the very end, as we see Ben’s home, the most beautiful of cities, San Francisco, from across the bay is there any evidence of repentance from seeing himself as the universe center. Only then, when he sees for the first time the larger picture, the city, the other, do the scales of cynicism and sarcasm, two great weights tying him to the gravity of his self’s brokenness, fall from his eyelids. The end is Ben’s beginning. May he walk with the Lord and now serve the world rather than cower in fear and self-loathing. 6/10
Talk to Me
The previews during horror movies are often scarier than the movie itself. Earlier this week, I found myself, anything but an eremite, completely alone in the theater. The preview for the new Exorcist movie began playing and by the time the child walked into the church service saying, “The body and the blood,” I could hardly stand it. I screamed in that great cavernous room. There was no echo. I ran out, sweating and panting, and found one of the AMC workers.
“Could you please turn on the cleaning lights for my movie? It is so dark in there and I am alone.”
She laughed a little, but agreed to turn them on. She also said, “But if anyone else shows up, I will have to turn them off.”
“That would be fine. It is just that all alone in the dark is a very scary place to be.”
In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus talks about to scotos to exoteron, “the outer darkness,” in three of his parables. The first is Matthew 8 where he heals the centurion’s lame servant. The Gentile's great faith and humility are contrasted with those who inherited the promise. Jesus lauds the centurion while warning his tribe that they may tossed into the outer darkness. In Matthew 22, Jesus tells another parable, this one about the wedding banquet where one misguided man failed to dress appropriately. Because the man took no care to prepare for the wedding and dress for it, the host tosses the misarrayed man into the outer darkness. And finally, in Matthew 25, we read Jesus’s parable of the talents. A master gives three servants bags of gold. The one who received five put the gold to work and returned ten bags. The servant given two bags returned four bags. But the lazy servant, out of fear of losing his master’s gold, dug a hole and put it there. When he returned the one bag to his master, his master was enraged that he had been lazy and done nothing with his talent. Jesus again says that such a person, driven by fear, will be tossed, like the misdressed and those who lack the faith of the centurion, into the outer darkness. Notice that in each of the parables there are two groups, those inside and those outside. Gospel contains both judgment and grace.
Ultimately, Talk to Me is a movie about the consequences of sin, which lead to the outer darkness. The denoument, when the corridors of the hospital close and darkness envelopes all, and she is all alone with nothing, not even a flicker of light, this is the outer darkness. The movie is not a fun or hopeful or edifying horror movie – it is a jeremiad about the dangers of reaching out one’s hand to the underworld, the occult, and asking it to speak to us. Ouija boarders, palm readers, astrologists, false prophets who preach wealth and war and security, and those seeking communion with the dead, take heed. The outer darkness awaits you.
This post was edited on 8/21/23 at 10:03 am
Posted on 8/9/23 at 7:52 pm to TulaneLSU
But for those who reach out and ask God to talk to us, the same God of life, who defeated death in the Resurrection of our Lord, the light of true life awaits. Communion and communication and relationship with the God who fashioned the cosmos await us. Let us together say to this God, “Talk to me!” God’s hand is always open to us. God shall warmly embrace us, just as the faithful centurion, the invited wedding guests, and the servants who used their talents to build God’s kingdom.
Unlike the parables, though, there is no mercy in this movie. There are no exemplars and thus, it serves only as a lamentation. It gives us the judgment, like the world, but fails to share with us the good news. 4/10
The Last Voyage of the Demeter
Theological education and general theological social intelligence is hitting, let us hope, a nadir. The latest example comes from this oddly shaped movie that comes straight out of the 1990s. It is dark and moves like a ship caught in the doldrums of August. Like a predictable horror story, we start with a core of characters only to watch them picked off one by one. After the second punctured carotid, I was ready to find a crate in which to nap until the main character’s battle with Dracula.
In what is supposed to be the climatic scene, the main character makes his heroic, provocative speech to Dracula: “You want them to believe that you are a god. You and I both know that you're not. You bleed like any of us. You sleep in dirt. You feed. Above all else, you feed. You want us to fear you. Underneath you're afraid! You're afraid of what lies on the other side, as any other living thing.”
Has he, nor the film’s writers, not read the Gospels of the one, true God, Jesus Christ, who bled for us, who did in fact sleep, and who ate with us? One could even argue that this same Jesus shared in fear, for did he not also say, “Take this cup from me,” while in the Garden of Gethsemane?
Ignorance of theology aside, The Last Voyage is a disappointingly plodding, dawdling high seas bore lost in the umbra of night. The plot is embarrassing. The writers stole the basic idea from Stroker, but Stroker's most important description of the ship -- the hand tied to the ship's wheel -- is absent. Stroker is rolling in his grave that this script is loosely associated with him. The claret cruor that drips so slowly might appeal to fans of the gorefest, but the movie is a cinematic borefest. 3/10
Transformers: Rise of the Beasts
The Transformers cartoon series was one of my favorite cartoons as a child. Mother did not want me watching them because they were violent, and she thought the violence potrayed there would influence my behaviors. I tried to convince her that it was an epic story of sacrificial love with Optimus Prime standing center as the Christ figure. But she did not buy it.
The Transfomers movie franchise, for this fan of the cartoon, has flailed and cratered. The only worthwhile edition of films was Bumblebee. Fifteen minutes into Rise of the Beasts I thought to myself, “Am I in a made-for-TV film at the theater?” This film felt significantly cheaper than the others and amateurish throughout. And how many times is Optimus going to have to relearn that humans are the Autobots’ friends? Most of the movies show Optimus moving from mistrusting to trusting humans after heroic individual actions. Optimus is not so vapid and forgetful that this lesson needs to be relearned in each film.
If Mirage was a character in the cartoons, I do not remember him. Whoever voiced this character should never voice another character again, so annoying was that voice. The graphics look as bad as they did over a decade ago when the first Transformers movie was released. Most scenes are either up close and blinding or from such a distance with such mechanical movements to recall a bad sixth grade history craft project using toy Army men.
On the bright side, it was mindless fun and the character of Optimus Prime is noble. The movie moved quickly and I quite enjoyed the ending, though, trying to fuse it with the terrible G.I. Joe franchise is a mistake. 4/10
Unlike the parables, though, there is no mercy in this movie. There are no exemplars and thus, it serves only as a lamentation. It gives us the judgment, like the world, but fails to share with us the good news. 4/10
The Last Voyage of the Demeter
Theological education and general theological social intelligence is hitting, let us hope, a nadir. The latest example comes from this oddly shaped movie that comes straight out of the 1990s. It is dark and moves like a ship caught in the doldrums of August. Like a predictable horror story, we start with a core of characters only to watch them picked off one by one. After the second punctured carotid, I was ready to find a crate in which to nap until the main character’s battle with Dracula.
In what is supposed to be the climatic scene, the main character makes his heroic, provocative speech to Dracula: “You want them to believe that you are a god. You and I both know that you're not. You bleed like any of us. You sleep in dirt. You feed. Above all else, you feed. You want us to fear you. Underneath you're afraid! You're afraid of what lies on the other side, as any other living thing.”
Has he, nor the film’s writers, not read the Gospels of the one, true God, Jesus Christ, who bled for us, who did in fact sleep, and who ate with us? One could even argue that this same Jesus shared in fear, for did he not also say, “Take this cup from me,” while in the Garden of Gethsemane?
Ignorance of theology aside, The Last Voyage is a disappointingly plodding, dawdling high seas bore lost in the umbra of night. The plot is embarrassing. The writers stole the basic idea from Stroker, but Stroker's most important description of the ship -- the hand tied to the ship's wheel -- is absent. Stroker is rolling in his grave that this script is loosely associated with him. The claret cruor that drips so slowly might appeal to fans of the gorefest, but the movie is a cinematic borefest. 3/10
Transformers: Rise of the Beasts
The Transformers cartoon series was one of my favorite cartoons as a child. Mother did not want me watching them because they were violent, and she thought the violence potrayed there would influence my behaviors. I tried to convince her that it was an epic story of sacrificial love with Optimus Prime standing center as the Christ figure. But she did not buy it.
The Transfomers movie franchise, for this fan of the cartoon, has flailed and cratered. The only worthwhile edition of films was Bumblebee. Fifteen minutes into Rise of the Beasts I thought to myself, “Am I in a made-for-TV film at the theater?” This film felt significantly cheaper than the others and amateurish throughout. And how many times is Optimus going to have to relearn that humans are the Autobots’ friends? Most of the movies show Optimus moving from mistrusting to trusting humans after heroic individual actions. Optimus is not so vapid and forgetful that this lesson needs to be relearned in each film.
If Mirage was a character in the cartoons, I do not remember him. Whoever voiced this character should never voice another character again, so annoying was that voice. The graphics look as bad as they did over a decade ago when the first Transformers movie was released. Most scenes are either up close and blinding or from such a distance with such mechanical movements to recall a bad sixth grade history craft project using toy Army men.
On the bright side, it was mindless fun and the character of Optimus Prime is noble. The movie moved quickly and I quite enjoyed the ending, though, trying to fuse it with the terrible G.I. Joe franchise is a mistake. 4/10
This post was edited on 8/21/23 at 9:52 am
Posted on 8/9/23 at 8:04 pm to TulaneLSU
Your Schtick is gay and lame and you need to keep it on the OT.if you feel the need to be cheeky Just troll like the rest of us. Anybody who gets amusement from your shite is a 43 year old from Gonzales whose best years of life were in 2005.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 8:42 pm to TulaneLSU
quote:
am still waiting to get my collectible pin from AMC for attending this on opening day. They have yet to return my emails.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 8:55 pm to CBandits82
Loved Indy 5 too but thought Mission Impossible was outstanding. 4/10, come on man
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:08 pm to TulaneLSU
Little Mermaid over Mission Impossible. Your a fricking clown.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:11 pm to TulaneLSU
quote:
Hilarious and surprisingly profound, Barbie thus far has been my favorite movie of this summer. 8/10
You’d fit right in with WWL radio that’s being broadcasted out of your precious New Orleans. Since Trump, the radio people seem like they want to say one thing, but quickly realized it would cost them a job, so they just try to play the middle and sound like fools trying to do it.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:14 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
Your Schtick is gay and lame and you need to keep it on the OT.if you feel the need to be cheeky Just troll like the rest of us. Anybody who gets amusement from your shite is a 43 year old from Gonzales whose best years of life were in 2005.
I know I’m in the minority but I agree with you.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:18 pm to TulaneLSU
The only one I gave a damn about reading, you haven't seen.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:20 pm to TulaneLSU
quote:
But what puts this movie over the top are the fans. That's right. By the end of the movie, 75% of the theater, consisting mostly of early and pre-teen girls were on the ground level with their hands up, screaming and touching the screen as if the movie were a concert. It was exhilarating to be in that number! I confess I too ran down to the floor and began dancing and screaming with the masses. What an awesome movie experience. Movie 6/10 Experience 10/10.
My favorite
Posted on 8/9/23 at 9:26 pm to WG_Dawg
quote:
I too ran down to the floor and began dancing and screaming with the masses.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 10:05 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
you need to keep it on the OT.if you feel the need to be cheeky Just troll like the rest of us. Anybody who gets amusement from your shite is a 43 year old from Gonzales whose best years of life were in 2005.
TulaneLSU has been doing movie review threads for 15 years. He’s a pillar of this forum.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 10:19 pm to meeple
Not really, he disappeared for quite some time after the incident at the gun range. He got called out for his BS, multiple posts were deleted from multiple posters, and he disappeared for quite some time. He does what he does which is great but I have a feeling he’s protected by Chicken claws, or whatever you call chicken feet.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 10:20 pm to TulaneLSU
quote:
My science teacher in boarding school recommended I read Junck’s Brighter than a Thousand Suns
You should listen to Linkin Park's A Thousand Suns instead and then write a review.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 10:48 pm to TulaneLSU
Posted on 8/9/23 at 10:56 pm to Hawgnsincebirth55
quote:
Anybody who gets amusement from your shite is a 43 year old from Gonzales whose best years of life were in 2005.
I feel like there is a deep message here that I’m not getting.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 11:49 pm to meeple
quote:Who hasn't
has been doing movie review threads for 15 years.
Posted on 8/9/23 at 11:55 pm to WG_Dawg
quote:
quote:
But what puts this movie over the top are the fans. That's right. By the end of the movie, 75% of the theater, consisting mostly of early and pre-teen girls were on the ground level with their hands up, screaming and touching the screen as if the movie were a concert. It was exhilarating to be in that number! I confess I too ran down to the floor and began dancing and screaming with the masses. What an awesome movie experience. Movie 6/10 Experience 10/10.
My favorite
Sadly I remember that review. Sadly remember because it read like a cry for help...like Chris Hansen and Norman Bates go to the movies with Mother.
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