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re: Funniest One-liner Your HS Coach Ever Said To You
Posted on 8/13/25 at 1:09 pm to morganwadefan
Posted on 8/13/25 at 1:09 pm to morganwadefan
"I said that to say this" was his catchphrase. 
Best line we ever heard:
"Boys there's only one thing that separates the winners from the losers. H-A-R-T. Heart"
(while super serious staring us dead in the eyes)
Best line we ever heard:
"Boys there's only one thing that separates the winners from the losers. H-A-R-T. Heart"
(while super serious staring us dead in the eyes)
0
Posted on 8/13/25 at 5:22 pm to Zappas Stache
quote:
Keep your head in the game Zappa, or do I need to bench you so you can go play slap and tickle with that cheerleader.
Must have been a thing with a certain age of coach. Had one tell me the same thing, after I was picking my arse up off the field after getting run over.
My mistake was getting up and saying 'shite coach, I didn't realize that was even an option.'
There were a lot of bleachers in my future I was about to meet.
Posted on 8/13/25 at 6:08 pm to morganwadefan
Basketball. “$100 move……….. .10 cent shot.
Posted on 8/13/25 at 6:22 pm to morganwadefan
Circle the wagon don’t worry about the mule
Posted on 8/13/25 at 6:49 pm to sjmabry
Was in a basketball game and our opponent had a fast as lightning point guard who had committed to Alabama. He torched us for the first two quarters and the coach changed guys guarding him. The third quarter it was my turn and he just blew right by me and I fouled him on the way by for an and one.
While he was shooting the foul shot it got quiet and the coach screamed “Bird35, why don’t you just ask him for his autograph!!”
That guy scored 13 points in the third quarter and thankfully it was my buddies turn in the fourth.
While he was shooting the foul shot it got quiet and the coach screamed “Bird35, why don’t you just ask him for his autograph!!”
That guy scored 13 points in the third quarter and thankfully it was my buddies turn in the fourth.
Posted on 8/13/25 at 9:59 pm to morganwadefan
In a close game against our rival high school, my older brother dropped a pass, killing the drive.
Everyone in the 2 sections below the rinkydink pressbox heard our OC call him a “dick-fingered bastard”
Everyone in the 2 sections below the rinkydink pressbox heard our OC call him a “dick-fingered bastard”
Posted on 8/14/25 at 5:16 pm to morganwadefan
My buddy played for Paterno.
One practice my buddy screwed up and was told to get off the field.
While he’s running off the field, Paterno yells to him, “ You’re an embarrassment to Italians everywhere!”
One practice my buddy screwed up and was told to get off the field.
While he’s running off the field, Paterno yells to him, “ You’re an embarrassment to Italians everywhere!”
Posted on 8/15/25 at 8:09 am to morganwadefan
"Son, this ain't that pussy 2A Parkview shite... this is 4A football!"
Posted on 8/15/25 at 8:58 am to morganwadefan
This is obviously not something ever said to me, and not quite on topic, but nothing a coach will ever say will top this IMO:
“What do you think of your team’s execution, coach?”
"I'm in favor of it."
“What do you think of your team’s execution, coach?”
"I'm in favor of it."
Posted on 8/15/25 at 9:47 am to morganwadefan
The week before exams a HS coach I coached for tells the kids in the after practice huddle "to keep up your grades just remember 5 minutes of sucking up is as good as an hour of studying"
Posted on 8/15/25 at 9:55 am to morganwadefan
wasn't a coach, but a player I coached.
had a pitcher who was better than average, but not amazing.
didn't throw exceptionally hard, but was mostly a junk baller that nobody really got good contact against him.
one game he gave up his first ever bomb (to a kid he went to school with). an absolute no-doubter to dead center.
couple inning later, he's starting to struggle a bit so I make a mound visit prepared to pull him.
looks at me and say "kind that hit that tank is on deck. I want him before you pull me out." and I agreed.
walked the current batter and gets to face the dude that homered on him.
first pitch and kid hits it ever farther than the first one, but foul.
next pitch is in the kids rib cage. pitcher just walks off the field toward dugout.
asked "what the hell was that?"
his answer: "now his girlfriend knows he's a lil crybaby bitch"
had a pitcher who was better than average, but not amazing.
didn't throw exceptionally hard, but was mostly a junk baller that nobody really got good contact against him.
one game he gave up his first ever bomb (to a kid he went to school with). an absolute no-doubter to dead center.
couple inning later, he's starting to struggle a bit so I make a mound visit prepared to pull him.
looks at me and say "kind that hit that tank is on deck. I want him before you pull me out." and I agreed.
walked the current batter and gets to face the dude that homered on him.
first pitch and kid hits it ever farther than the first one, but foul.
next pitch is in the kids rib cage. pitcher just walks off the field toward dugout.
asked "what the hell was that?"
his answer: "now his girlfriend knows he's a lil crybaby bitch"
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