the 800 pound gorilla with a chainsaw for a penis

just some pre-season rambling here, but Im an eternal optimist, and despite having fewer and fewer reasons to justify that, as the frustrating days have become weeks have become months have become years, I continue to believe we will be great again, very very soon. we will be terrifying again. we will be the show. we will be that 800 pound gorilla with a chainsaw for a dick.

I have almost no confidence in Orgeron, or Ensminger, and even less in the people in the AD, and even less in the board. we are a University run by morons in a state run by frickups, but despite all of that, we are still LSU.

no one in America can even come close to the embarrassing level of talent that we have within a hundred miles of campus, and there is nothing on earth like Tiger Stadium at its peak.

our problem, imo, more than anything else, has simply been sheer random bad luck.

that of course starts with bama.

we're Barkley, and they're Jordan, and as bad as that hurts, what makes it downright brutal is the fact that we should be Jordan. we did absolutely nothing wrong when it came to losing saban. he's said it himself, he had everything a coach could ever ask for here, including a contract that guaranteed he would always be the highest paid HC in CFB. he simply wanted to try the NFL, and when that didnt work, though no bama fan will ever admit this, he absolutely did contact us about coming back.

but Miles was 22-4. he won a Peach Bowl, he won a Sugar Bowl, he had a number 1 pick in the NFL draft, and he was recruiting well. you simply cannot fire that guy.

so saban ended up at bama. thats just god awful bad luck, theres no other word for it, its bad luck to a legendary degree, we're the Wally Pipp of CFB.

despite that, things were good.

1971 Nebraska is often considered the best team of all time. they were the first team to ever beat 3 of the final AP top 5.

the second team to ever do that was 2011 LSU.

you could argue LSUs record was even more impressive because the 3 final top 5 teams Nebraska beat were Colorado, Oklahoma, and bama. when they played, Colorado was 9, Oklahoma was 2, and bama was 2. these are the only 3 ranked teams that Nebraska played that year.

the 3 final top 5 teams LSU beat were Oregon, Arkansas, and bama. when they played LSU, Oregon was 3, Arkansas was 3, and bama was 2. LSU also beat UGA and West Virginia, for a total of 5 wins over the final top 20, and 4 of those 5 were on the road. they played 9 ranked teams that year.

unfortunately we're denied that legacy we earned because gregg fricking williams watched us practice in the dome then gave Kirby Smart our signals.



williams has been in the NFL for 25 years, hes probably never even seen the option, yet suddenly he had all the answers. its bullshite, that team didnt just magically forget how to play football overnight.

ever since then its as if everything that could go wrong has, but this shite cannot last forever, it simply cant, it cannot rain forever, the sun must come out, luck WILL swing back in our favor at some point. yes, sometimes it feels like were cursed, but curses arent real, theyre excuses for pussies, and we can be as great as we choose to be.

so lets fricking choose to be.