re: How many posters on here have hit what they considered ROCK BOTTOM?

Approached it numerous times but the closest I was to hitting it was when I had to drop out of a top 10 law school. Here I had an opportunity that people would kill for and I couldn’t handle it due to mental illness.

I enrolled in another graduate program and realized it was garbage and quit. Ended up in another graduate program at a mediocre state school in a field I had no experience in. Literally the only reason I ended up there is because they didn’t require letters of recommendation and I was too embarrassed to ask anyone anymore.

Then after I graduated that program, for 2 years, I couldn’t find a job in the field and was working as a temp through a staffing agency.

Then I moved to a totally new city, living with my parents at 26, working a retail job for $8.25 an hour.

But then my break came. Finally got a job in my field that I’ve held for almost 5 years. But during those 5 years, I’ve had to go on disability twice due to mental breakdowns.

So it’s just constantly a cycle of going down and trying to pick myself back up. Getting up in the morning is the hardest thing I have to do all day. Part of me just wants it all to go away but I’m scared to die. But I have my better days sometimes. I record each day a rating out of 10 and I can go from a cycle of 2s and 3s to a 6 randomly so it’s not all bad. Just keep going and hope things get better.

At least I don’t have a partner or kid depending on me.

Just rambling but this is cheaper than therapy and something in there might help someone.

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I don’t think it’s possible for me to ever sink back down to my lowest point. I’m too much older and wiser, and too much has changed for the better

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I often feel that way too. It scares me when I question whether I could come back from it again. I don’t know that I have the energy to get sober again and rebuild my life. It sickens me to even think about it.

Anyone responding hasn’t.

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Same. My parents and fiancé died, and I got to a really, dark depressed place that was nothing I ever imagined for myself. I went from having it all to truly having nothing and thankfully I found my way to peace and true joy again. I am very grateful for each moment and don’t take anything for granted

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Very sorry for your loss. I’m glad you found peace and joy again. You’re right about taking nothing for granted. My mom’s aging and in bad health, every moment I have with her in a good mood not in pain I cherish.

Yep. Been there and don’t ever plan on going back. I will say this, hitting rock bottom changes you and not necessarily in a good way.

(no message)

Honestly...the drive from Orlando to Gainesville after getting a call that my wife was at the hospital after having a miscarriage (while coaching) was one dip. That was the longest drive ever on the way up and miserable when I was driving us home. That Saturday we had all the blinds closed and just watched movies all day. We then went oldest son with a 250k NICU bill, a second miscarriage, and my youngest who racked up a 400k NICU bill (would've been 7 figures if they weren't conservative...thankfully he avoided ECMO while being right in that line.) Being next to him when he crashed 36 hours after he was born was another low...thankfully I was in there with a really good friend who got me out of there so I didn't see everything they were doing.

When you get older things that seemed like rock bottom tend to be blessings in disguise. Never would have believed that half a lifetime ago.

Young Dolph died yesterday, so yes

That's the most depressing thing I've ever read. You should seek help, baw.

My college roommates stole my rent money for crack. I had no other $, lived with 3 dudes and the only girl I had was this guy's wife that he wanted me to bang her. The whole thing sucked and was weird.

I already beat their asses for other nonsense and realized I was in the wrong place, wrong time, with the wrong people.