- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Coaching Changes
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
Whats the worst excuse you've ever made to get out of bad sex?
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:34 pm
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:34 pm
Hooked up with this girl after a party one night and it was horrible. She called me about a week later wanting me to come over for round 2 and the first excuse I thought of was "I would but I ate too much spaghetti". I felt like an idiot that I couldn't come up with a better excuse on the spot but I guess she got the point, she didnt call me anymore after that.
46
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:36 pm to CrimsonFever
What is this 'bad sex' you speak of?
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:36 pm to CrimsonFever
quote:
"I would but I ate too much spaghetti".
That's better than the ones I've been using. I'm stealing that.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:37 pm to CrimsonFever
"I'm saving myself for Satan."
(Used to be "I'm holding out for Joan Rivers" but I'm pretty sure she croaked.)
(Used to be "I'm holding out for Joan Rivers" but I'm pretty sure she croaked.)
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:37 pm to CrimsonFever
Bad sex is like pizza, regardless of the quality it’s still good. Are you one of those gays?
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:38 pm to CrimsonFever
“It’s not you…… It’s me….”
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:38 pm to CrimsonFever
“I was actually trying to hook up with your friend and always had you as a backup option. Bad timing but, can you send me her number?”
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:38 pm to CrimsonFever
My dog was waiting for me at home
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:39 pm to TigerNlc
quote:
Bad sex is like pizza
Yeah it has too much cheese and smells like anchovies.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:40 pm to CrimsonFever
What’s bad sex?
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:41 pm to LSU_GOOSE
quote:
My dog was waiting for me at home
I used that as an excuse not to go have some drinks with a female co worker after inventory one night. I didnt have a dog. She was engaged and a little nuts and I was not interested in any unneeded drama.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:43 pm to CrimsonFever
How bad are you talking? I've had a sort of dead fish where the girl just laid there and did nothing and it took me like 30 minutes to finish and I've had a girl put hickies on my dick because she took "sucking dick" too literally. Looked like my weiner went 15 rounds with Apollo Creed or I had used it to catch lamprey eels.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:44 pm to CrimsonFever
LOL I have a dog so it’s very believable
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:46 pm to CrimsonFever
My mom needs to wash my sheets.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:46 pm to CrimsonFever
Even the worst sex I’ve had wasn’t so bad that I needed to get out of it.
Now, have I made excuses not to hang out with women even through the night would likely end in sex? Sure. Juice wasn’t worth the squeeze.
Now, have I made excuses not to hang out with women even through the night would likely end in sex? Sure. Juice wasn’t worth the squeeze.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:49 pm to Jake88
quote:
Looked like my weiner went 15 rounds with Apollo Creed or I had used it to catch lamprey eels.
Okay, this was just a Ho-hump post until you finished it Damn strong with this one two combo.
Literally did a spit take. Hilarious. You win my post of the day award.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:50 pm to CrimsonFever
quote:
bad sex
Excuse me, what now?
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:51 pm to LSU_GOOSE
your vagina was too small the first time
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:54 pm to OWLFAN86
quote:
your vagina was too small the first time
Your vagina was as loose as a bowl of spaghetti.
Posted on 8/8/21 at 7:54 pm to Jake88
Once I got her clothes off she smelled like a bag full of assholes. I later found out that she was a pretty bad drug addict which probably explains it, which is sad, she was a solid 8 out of 10 as far as looks.
Page 1 of 4
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News