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Started By
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Parents, do you spank your kids?
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:04 pm
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:04 pm
I have two kids and I may have spanked either one of them at most twice in their life. And they are both older now, high school and about to be junior high. The boy has never been in trouble in his life, he is abnormally good. And my daughter looks up to her brother so follows his example so she rarely gets in trouble either. Both I feel like have really good moral foundations and know right from wrong. We aren’t religious so they have only rarely been to church (my parent would take them to theirs sometimes) so it’s not a religious foundation, they just both have solid moral values that I’m proud of.
For parents that do spank their kids I’m ok with that, it’s just a different method of parenting. I was spanked as a kid and deserved it I’m sure, but there were other methods of teaching me right from wrong that my parents could have pursued but didn't.
Some criticize talking to your kids as a way to teach them a lesson and the effectiveness of that to me depends on your parenting for the other 99% of the time when they’re not in trouble. I consider myself to be a great dad and I do all sorts of things with my kids ever since they were babies to now. We have such a strong bond that I do think talking to them when they get in trouble is and has been a very effective way of teaching them a lesson. There’s generally some sort of punishment that comes along with that like losing the iPad for a weekend or something. For those parents without as strong of a bond with their kids maybe simply talking to them wouldn’t work.
I’m not criticizing those that do spank their kids, I’m curious about everyone’s approach.
For parents that do spank their kids I’m ok with that, it’s just a different method of parenting. I was spanked as a kid and deserved it I’m sure, but there were other methods of teaching me right from wrong that my parents could have pursued but didn't.
Some criticize talking to your kids as a way to teach them a lesson and the effectiveness of that to me depends on your parenting for the other 99% of the time when they’re not in trouble. I consider myself to be a great dad and I do all sorts of things with my kids ever since they were babies to now. We have such a strong bond that I do think talking to them when they get in trouble is and has been a very effective way of teaching them a lesson. There’s generally some sort of punishment that comes along with that like losing the iPad for a weekend or something. For those parents without as strong of a bond with their kids maybe simply talking to them wouldn’t work.
I’m not criticizing those that do spank their kids, I’m curious about everyone’s approach.
This post was edited on 3/12/19 at 7:23 pm
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:07 pm to DavidTheGnome
I've spanked my kid a few times when she was little. She never really has given me much reason to otherwise. She listens to me. Her and mom are catty as hell to each other sometimes though
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:08 pm to DavidTheGnome
No. There’s too much psychological issues associated with spankings, it’s also assault.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:12 pm to DavidTheGnome
I spank when it’s needed.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:14 pm to 13SaintTiger
quote:
No. There’s too much psychological issues associated with spankings, it’s also assault.
So, we'll see you on Springer in a few years saying your kid runs all over you
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:14 pm to DavidTheGnome
I havent had to yet, but Im not above it. So far, taking things away works fine.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:15 pm to DavidTheGnome
You could have used more
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:15 pm to 13SaintTiger
I do think there’s definitely the risk of psychological effects on them. I don’t want my kids to fear me. I want them to both love and respect me and I’m not one of the ones that go out of their way to be their best friend etc. When violence is introduced into the equation I do think it complicates things and could work to erode the bond established.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:16 pm to 13SaintTiger
quote:
There’s too much psychological issues associated
Yeah, like later on in life, they are well mannered, polite and well behaved.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:19 pm to ezride25
I do. And they damn well listen too. But I don’t make them get the switch like my parents did. I just use the belt but not the buckle side.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:20 pm to jlovel7
quote:
You could have used more
My parents don’t know that I’ve killed someone (LucasP) but I’m sure if that happened when I was a kid and they found out they’d tear the shite out of me with a belt.
I was a relatively bad kid growing up, at least compared to my kids and how they behave. I wonder if that is the result of my parents approach of parenting via domination and fear instead of respect and love. Not that my parents didn’t love me, they certainly did, but my dad is concerned with being a macho type and resorted to that trope for parenting style instead of my approach with my kids.
I do think my parenting approach and how I raise my kids is a direct result of how I was raised. I didn’t want my kids to fear talking to me. I think I’ve done a fantastic job with it so far too and many many people have complemented me on what a great dad I am.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:20 pm to DavidTheGnome
Really depends on if they're into that sorta thing.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:21 pm to DavidTheGnome
Yes. Bare hand tho soI can feel how hard it was. No belts and switches or anything
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:21 pm to Bustedsack
quote:
Really depends on if they're into that sorta thing.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:26 pm to DavidTheGnome
My 6 year old just got a spanking 3 minutes ago. She probably gets one every 2 months.
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:26 pm to DavidTheGnome
no they dont, and they never tell their kids no or fuss them for being disrespectful to adults and demand participation trophies and grading curves and mandatory passing and forced graduations even if they do fail so no one ever fails or gets left behind for being a dumbass like they rightfully should
thats why we have a country filled with 50 yr old cry baby snowflakes right now
thats why we have a country filled with 50 yr old cry baby snowflakes right now
Posted on 3/12/19 at 7:29 pm to DavidTheGnome
quote:
I was spanked as a kid and deserved it I’m sure, but there were other methods of teaching me right from wrong that my parents could have pursued but didn't.
no kid ever deserves to be hit. it makes your child fear you and more than anything it's fricking lazy. it requires no actual thought or parenting skills.
you need to figure out your child's individual psychology, connect with them and teach them. that is hard, but that is real parenting, and why most people aren't actually cut out to be parents.
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