re: Biggest Jerk move you have ever made

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Cannot, will not post it. It's a legit goin to hell moment.

Banged my younger brothers ex GF when i was in HS.

When I was in college, I once went down to my grandparents' house in da Parish on Easter Sunday. As I was driving down St. Claude in the Nint Ward, I saw a Ghetto Lad standing on the corner dressed in his Sunday best. He looked something like this.




Well, it had been raining and there was a big "mud puddle" right in front of him.

Although no one else in the car saw it, I could swear that a squirrel jumped out in front of my car "forcing" me to swerve to my right (and speed up) and hit that puddle doing about 50.

The Ghetto Lad didn't look too happy in his new mud colored fur coat. But, I'm hoping that he at least took comfort in the fact that I didn't hit that imaginary squirrel.

I punched a good friend of mine over a fishing hole - we were about 13. I guess I was was feeling my oats and there was chicks around. I popped him 2 or 3 good times and he stood there and cried. Everyone felt sorry for him. I felt bad.
Funny thing was that this wasn't on either of our properties- it was on a mutual friends.
A few years later he shot me in the butt with a pellet gun. Lol

Why would someone downvote this - I was 13 lol

It's 5th grade. I'm from Texas but have been living in Michigan for the last year or so. I still have a drawl. Combine that with the fact I'm about two-three grades ahead of the rest of the class in math, I'm probably numbers 1-9 on the list of Top 10 nerds for jocks to pick on.

Have a "friend". There's friendlier, but I'm hanging out with him this week. He's not solidly in the inner ring of jocks, but he's definitely in the outer ring. Somebody who could be a great offensive tackle if he knew what he would become. But he'd definitely end up with the law enforcement build. Probably a cop, at worst a mall security guard. But he's got this cross he wears in a necklace around his neck. From his trip to Europe, probably the Vatican. You can guess where this is going. But everything up to this point makes it right, but this story is about being a Jerk.

In any case his "best friend", who I knew from being there in 4th grade, comes back from wherever he moved to (I'd say Paris, but probably just downstate or Ohio). He's so enthralled with his friend being back he doesn't realize the two of them have been chasing me around his yard for an hour and a half. With squirt guns. If they weren't spraying me up close, they were smacking me with them.

Yet another round where he catches me but best-friend is refilling. I get a little mad. We tangle. My hand gets caught in his necklace and as I pull my arm back, it goes flying and lands on the ground. He pushes me away, and I notice what I've done. There's the necklace, on the ground, I see it. I look at him, and he has the exact "lets beat the nerd look on his face" and not the "Oh! I lost something valuble". He chases me up the hill to a tree. He chases me around it once or twice, trips over a root and I'm free.

I'm about to rush around the house when I see BFF has finished refilling. I barge through the backdoor, lock the back door, grab the phone, call my parents, and demand they pick me up NOW! BFF tells me "come out here you little shite". Such language for a 5th grader. "Friend's" mom walks in, doesn't know what's been going on outside. Talks to me the way a mother should. Tells me I look soaked, offers me a drink, chats to me about school (she wants the best for the little mall cop). BFF disappeared, no idea where.

Crying. Me and friend's mother go outside, friend is digging through the grass. He's lost his necklace and has been looking for it. BFF has been looking for it too. Mom is unphased at first but begins looking too when "friend" starts breaking down. I spend two minutes "looking" as well, then Mom's Suburban shows up and I'm almost safe.

Friend's mom says she wasn't expecting my mom. Mom knew something was wrong the whole time and lies about the family going out on the lake for the rest of the afternoon into the evening.

I gaze once more at the place I'm certain the pendant lay. Him and his BFF are no where near it. Sigh of relief, the sliding door shuts, and I never have to do anything with my "friend" again.

quote:

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I barge through the backdoor, lock the back door, grab the phone, call my parents, and demand they pick me up NOW! BFF tells me "come out here you little shite". Such language for a 5th grader. 

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You're a pussy.

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