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Started By
Message
Aging parents money question.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 9:32 am
Posted on 3/29/26 at 9:32 am
Long story I will try to sum up. Mom and dad are mid 70’s. Mom took care of everything. Dad always quiet and behind the scenes. Mom has early dementia. She will be alert with a conversation. Tell who and where she is and who’s the president. But she is beyond forgetful. Buy the same shite 10 times. Repeat herself etc etc.
We have put controls on her phone but it is still an iPhone. She apparently answered the damned phone and spoke to some turd. She doesn’t remember any of it. Dad only knows she spoke with someone for 20 mins. So….. A charge comes out for $200 in an Apple purchase. A $106 charge at a wal mart gets submitted and rejected 25 times. And finally $10,000 of her money is moved from dad’s money to her account.
We knew about it because my wife and I have access and use of their accounts. So we watch them. We have blocked mom and basically load gift cards with her own money onto her checking account so she can’t waste money buying the same thing 10 times.
Basically now dad has too much money exposed in a checking account. What should I do? Where can I move around 15-25k? Just a separate bank saving account?? Stocks? Money market? This is my Louisiana Baw dad. Unless he has easy access to it if needed he will want NO PART of something where money is tied up.
We have already frozen everything. What can I do??
We have put controls on her phone but it is still an iPhone. She apparently answered the damned phone and spoke to some turd. She doesn’t remember any of it. Dad only knows she spoke with someone for 20 mins. So….. A charge comes out for $200 in an Apple purchase. A $106 charge at a wal mart gets submitted and rejected 25 times. And finally $10,000 of her money is moved from dad’s money to her account.
We knew about it because my wife and I have access and use of their accounts. So we watch them. We have blocked mom and basically load gift cards with her own money onto her checking account so she can’t waste money buying the same thing 10 times.
Basically now dad has too much money exposed in a checking account. What should I do? Where can I move around 15-25k? Just a separate bank saving account?? Stocks? Money market? This is my Louisiana Baw dad. Unless he has easy access to it if needed he will want NO PART of something where money is tied up.
We have already frozen everything. What can I do??
This post was edited on 3/29/26 at 9:47 am
6
Posted on 3/29/26 at 10:08 am to LSU alum wannabe
Money market accounts with most brokers are about as safe as you can get and are earning 3.6ish %. Also money can be moved back and forth easily. I’m in Fidelity.
Tell him it’s to earn interest on cash and it should be an easy conversation.
Tell him it’s to earn interest on cash and it should be an easy conversation.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 10:27 am to SquatchDawg
quote:
Also money can be moved back and forth easily. I’m in Fidelity.
Explain it like you’re talking to a very nice but a coonass uncle.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 1:01 pm to LSU alum wannabe
quote:
Explain it like you’re talking to a very nice but a coonass uncle.
The same financial entities that you can open investment accounts with (Fidelity, Vanguard, etc, etc) to invest in the stock market will also let you invest in "money market funds" which are essentially low risk bond funds. They usually pay a bit more than a checking account will, with the only drawback (which is a benefit in your case) that you have to wait for transfers between your bank and the financial institution, like you would if you sold any other mutual fund and then wanted to transfer the cash back to your account.
Essentially adds an extra step and a short delay to access the money, while still making it very easy and earning a little extra interest on the side.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 1:21 pm to LSU alum wannabe
Tell him it’s just like a savings account that earns interest. Once it’s set up you can transfer money to and from your bank account and it only takes 2 days. It’s not in the stock market or mutual funds. You can also pull it up every day and check it.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 3:23 pm to Joshjrn
Thanks. Isn’t there an initial period of a few months? 3-6 months before funds can be accessed? It’s not a problem I just want to be clear.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 3:35 pm to LSU alum wannabe
No should be immediately accessible in a MM account. Might take a a day or so to settle if moving to/from checking.
Posted on 3/29/26 at 4:48 pm to LSU alum wannabe
My father could not remember my kids but he could remember his and my ssn.
He would blurt it out any time an H1B would call.
Pissed me off.
I took his phone and gave him a new number.
He would blurt it out any time an H1B would call.
Pissed me off.
I took his phone and gave him a new number.
Posted on 3/30/26 at 7:30 am to LSU alum wannabe
What bank do they use?
Couple suggestions:
1.) make an account for their bills and auto pay out of there. Don’t give them access to those in regards to a check book or card. Keep them yourself
2.) have a second account and card for their spending that you limit to X amount.
3.) have a 3rd account that’s a savings, Money market, etc where the bulk of the money is kept. You can within seconds on an app transfer money in and out between all of these. The 3rd account is where you have any deposits like social security go to. The 3rd account doesn’t have anyway to pull money out outside of a bank app transfer or in the brick and mortar withdrawal.
Couple suggestions:
1.) make an account for their bills and auto pay out of there. Don’t give them access to those in regards to a check book or card. Keep them yourself
2.) have a second account and card for their spending that you limit to X amount.
3.) have a 3rd account that’s a savings, Money market, etc where the bulk of the money is kept. You can within seconds on an app transfer money in and out between all of these. The 3rd account is where you have any deposits like social security go to. The 3rd account doesn’t have anyway to pull money out outside of a bank app transfer or in the brick and mortar withdrawal.
Posted on 3/30/26 at 7:51 am to baldona
Thanks. Setting it up today.
Posted on 3/30/26 at 8:46 am to LSU alum wannabe
Yep, baldona’s advice is spot on.
You might also consider:
Credit Agency Freeze - with all three credit agencies. You can lift the freeze temporarily if you need to. Clark Howard.com has a good guide for how to.
Bank and Brokerage Accounts - make certain you are authorized on all these accounts, regardless of beneficiaries.
Wills -make sure you do everything you can in advance to avoid Probate. Make sure you have durable PoA docs for both parents.
Consider a Revocable Trust - placing their primary assets (e.g. real estate) into the trust … with yourself designated as the Trustee.
Above all, take care of yourself as you navigate these challenging family issues. Having very recently buried my 93 year old father, I cannot express how comforting it was to have planned in advance for these many challenges. May God Bless.
You might also consider:
Credit Agency Freeze - with all three credit agencies. You can lift the freeze temporarily if you need to. Clark Howard.com has a good guide for how to.
Bank and Brokerage Accounts - make certain you are authorized on all these accounts, regardless of beneficiaries.
Wills -make sure you do everything you can in advance to avoid Probate. Make sure you have durable PoA docs for both parents.
Consider a Revocable Trust - placing their primary assets (e.g. real estate) into the trust … with yourself designated as the Trustee.
Above all, take care of yourself as you navigate these challenging family issues. Having very recently buried my 93 year old father, I cannot express how comforting it was to have planned in advance for these many challenges. May God Bless.
This post was edited on 3/30/26 at 8:49 am
Posted on 3/30/26 at 12:49 pm to cadillacattack
Thank you sir.
Posted on 3/30/26 at 6:13 pm to LSU alum wannabe
And, change the settings on their phones to only permit phone calls from contacts if you can, or require an initial screening before the phone even rings.
I was forced out of a phone number I'd had for 14 years into a new number, and my spam calls dropped 99.9%, but I'm guessing they won't go along with that. Somehow I did end up on some sort of hispanic list (I have the Spanish keyboard on my phone for DuoLingo I guess) and got hit with people selling immigration services once a week for about 12 weeks on my new number, but nothing else.
quote:
Choose one of the following:
Never: Call Screening is turned off and your iPhone will ring when you receive a call from an unsaved number.
Ask Reason for Calling: Calls from unknown numbers will be asked for more information before iPhone rings.
Silence: Calls from unsaved numbers will be silenced, sent to voicemail, and appear in the Recents list.
I was forced out of a phone number I'd had for 14 years into a new number, and my spam calls dropped 99.9%, but I'm guessing they won't go along with that. Somehow I did end up on some sort of hispanic list (I have the Spanish keyboard on my phone for DuoLingo I guess) and got hit with people selling immigration services once a week for about 12 weeks on my new number, but nothing else.
Posted on 4/1/26 at 12:17 am to LSU alum wannabe
From experience, visit with a lawyer. I wish I had in 2013. It all went south from there.
Posted on 4/1/26 at 11:52 am to LSU alum wannabe
Money Market or CDs before stocks
Posted on 4/1/26 at 12:16 pm to LSU alum wannabe
quote:
LSU alum wannabe
If you want as tactical as the fund, SWVXX is the Schwab version of the money market described in this thread.
SWVXX
Posted on 4/1/26 at 12:17 pm to cadillacattack
quote:
Credit Agency Freeze - with all three credit agencies. You can lift the freeze temporarily if you need to. Clark Howard.com has a good guide for how to.
I just did this. It's 15 minutes to do across all three. Very easy.
Posted on 4/1/26 at 2:39 pm to LSU alum wannabe
That's not too much in a checking account. Go open a money market at a brokerage or bank
Posted on 4/1/26 at 8:12 pm to cadillacattack
you can avoid probate in Louisiana?
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