- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Coaching Changes
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
What Is Society’s Responsibility When the Foster System Fails?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:51 am
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:51 am
What do we do when the systems in place fail?
I met a man who grew up in foster care. No stable family, no support, no real guidance. When he aged out of the system at 18, he was completely on his own. Not long after, he was arrested for armed robbery. That was obviously a terrible decision. He said he felt like he had no options, which I can understand.
Fast forward a few years. He has a baby with his girlfriend that he met at the shelter he stayed in after aging out of foster care. Then the girlfriend gets arrested. Now he's alone with a 4-month-old infant, with no one to help. No family, no mentors, no parenting classes, no safety net. Tragically, the baby died while in his care. He's now facing criminal charges again, but the deeper question sticks with me:
What should we expect from someone who was never taught how to be a parent? Who never saw a healthy relationship, who was raised by the state, and then dropped by it? At what point does society step in beyond a punitive role, but to prevent tragedy?
I get that people make choices. But when someone’s entire life has been shaped by neglect and abandonment, is it really fair to say it’s all just "his fault"? He was raised in a system that is in place to protect children. Does society/government shoulder any responsibility when that system fails?
We talk a lot about personal responsibility, but we also need to talk about institutional responsibility. If foster care is meant to protect and prepare kids for adulthood, and it consistently fails to do so, then what's the fix? And how do we stop another baby from dying the same way?
I met a man who grew up in foster care. No stable family, no support, no real guidance. When he aged out of the system at 18, he was completely on his own. Not long after, he was arrested for armed robbery. That was obviously a terrible decision. He said he felt like he had no options, which I can understand.
Fast forward a few years. He has a baby with his girlfriend that he met at the shelter he stayed in after aging out of foster care. Then the girlfriend gets arrested. Now he's alone with a 4-month-old infant, with no one to help. No family, no mentors, no parenting classes, no safety net. Tragically, the baby died while in his care. He's now facing criminal charges again, but the deeper question sticks with me:
What should we expect from someone who was never taught how to be a parent? Who never saw a healthy relationship, who was raised by the state, and then dropped by it? At what point does society step in beyond a punitive role, but to prevent tragedy?
I get that people make choices. But when someone’s entire life has been shaped by neglect and abandonment, is it really fair to say it’s all just "his fault"? He was raised in a system that is in place to protect children. Does society/government shoulder any responsibility when that system fails?
We talk a lot about personal responsibility, but we also need to talk about institutional responsibility. If foster care is meant to protect and prepare kids for adulthood, and it consistently fails to do so, then what's the fix? And how do we stop another baby from dying the same way?
66
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:54 am to 4cubbies
Do you not have a bicycle you can give him in exchange for some type of “manual labor”?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:55 am to 4cubbies
People like him should be raised by the state to become a warrior class. It would solve so many problems.
He doesn’t belong on the streets, he belongs on a landing craft invading China
He doesn’t belong on the streets, he belongs on a landing craft invading China
This post was edited on 7/14/25 at 9:56 am
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:56 am to 4cubbies
I think about this sometimes... I don't have any answers, it's a terrible situation.
I think some areas do some extension services to help new adults find work and housing.
I think some areas do some extension services to help new adults find work and housing.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:57 am to 4cubbies
Do you spend your entire day dreaming of ways that government can control everything?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:58 am to 4cubbies
Well the first thing is to look away from government being the nanny
Posted on 7/14/25 at 9:59 am to 4cubbies
quote:
What should we expect from someone who was never taught how to be a parent
It is a stain on the nations soul to let these kids fall through the cracks, and go to dens of child molestors and people who only host them for the paycheck.
Resources for taking care of orphans and foster kids should be bountiful - it’s the Christian thing to do, and long term would result in less social cost (drug addicts etc).
On the flip, society needs to stop being lenient. Those who have kids they drop on societies plate to take care of need a forced Snip Snip. Otherwise we end up with more abortions and kids set up for failure
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:00 am to 4cubbies
Cubbies you are all about fighting that fight how about this poor foster guy keep his dick in his pants instead of creating a child that will fall into the same shitty situation. Rinse and repeat. You play the blame game way too much. The system in place sucks but unfortunately it is not going away any time soon. It's called accountability and if you don't have it bad shite happens. Quit defending these people and if you don't like it open your check book and make a contribution to organizations trying to stop this behavior.
The democrats you vote for want this it is one of the most reliable voter bases they count on maybe people like yourself should write your political politicians and start something.
The democrats you vote for want this it is one of the most reliable voter bases they count on maybe people like yourself should write your political politicians and start something.
This post was edited on 7/14/25 at 1:09 pm
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:00 am to Padme
quote:
Well the first thing is to look away from government being the nanny
What would happen to orphans?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:01 am to GeauxBurrow312
quote:
Resources for taking care of orphans and foster kids should be bountiful - it’s the Christian thing to do, and long term would result in less social cost (drug addicts etc).
I don't think Christians get to play a part in this as much anymore.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:01 am to 4cubbies
quote:
We talk a lot about personal responsibility, but we also need to talk about institutional responsibility
That’s what’s wrong with this country now- all we talk about is institutional responsibility. Personal responsibility and accountability is the answer. There is none- and that’s the real problem. You don’t need anything other than the knowledge of good and evil (you’re born with it) and free will (God-given). The rest is squarely on you. Your current circumstances are the result of decisions you made years ago. Sow. Reap. Rinse. Repeat. We are the culmination of our own decisions.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:02 am to SallysHuman
quote:
I don't think Christians get to play a part in this as much anymore.
What do you mean "get to"?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:03 am to 4cubbies
quote:
We talk a lot about personal responsibility, but we also need to talk about institutional responsibility.
From your anecdotal story, it sounds a whole lot more like personal responsibility was for more at play here. Maybe we actually need to be talking more about personal responsibility.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:03 am to 4cubbies
quote:
but we also need to talk about institutional responsibility.
No. Young people should suffer the consequences of bad decisions. It's how we used to learn to be smarter.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:04 am to 4cubbies
quote:
What do you mean "get to"?
Religion and charity went hand in hand for centuries.
Government doesn't like competition.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:05 am to SallysHuman
quote:NGOs baby it's why Catholic Charities and Lutheran Services are more than happy to get all that Gov cheese to indirectly pay for illegal immigrants.
Religion and charity went hand in hand for centuries.
Government doesn't like competition.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:05 am to 4cubbies
So he lived his whole life under the umbrella of a government controlled and monitored system, which failed him, and you think we need MORE government control and monitoring?
Typical.
Typical.
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:07 am to 4cubbies
quote:
What do we do when the systems in place fail?
What? The government doesn't do things as well or as efficiently as the private sector???
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:07 am to Prodigal Son
quote:
Personal responsibility and accountability is the answer.
Is this something people are born having? Or is it learned?
Posted on 7/14/25 at 10:07 am to 4cubbies
quote:
What would happen to orphans?
It doesn’t matter how sobbish you get with your examples, do you only see government as a solution? Do you think government throughout human history has been the only solution for orphans? Think outside the box for a change. Make up your own ministry for orphans. Start with one. But don’t stay on your forever tangent
Page 1 of 13
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News