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Started By
Message
It's been a rough month
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:02 am
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:02 am
It's been a sorry month for my family and I. My mom has dementia and we've had to call in hospice. My dog died at the beginning of the month and this past Wednesday I was in a motorcycle accident. On Tuesday before the accident my ac went out at the house. It's been one thing after another.
I don't even remember the accident. One second I'm riding my bike and the next I wake up in the trama unit. I was told that after the accident I was talking but eventually started throwing up everywhere. I suppose I hit my head and had a concussion. I know I was lucky, 2 broke ribs, punctured lung, severely injured and sprained ankles, injured shoulders, along with some internal injuries but I just can't believe I can't remember anything. I get images like from a dream where I think a car was in my lane but no witnesses so I've no idea what happened. Got my arse kicked for sure. Just hard to believe I could be dead and I wouldn't know the how of it.
I know that my mom isn't going to get better, that this is it but you keep hoping, keep trying. But there's nothing you can do except make her end of life comfortable. It just is what it is. Just needed to vent and get this crap off my chest.
I don't even remember the accident. One second I'm riding my bike and the next I wake up in the trama unit. I was told that after the accident I was talking but eventually started throwing up everywhere. I suppose I hit my head and had a concussion. I know I was lucky, 2 broke ribs, punctured lung, severely injured and sprained ankles, injured shoulders, along with some internal injuries but I just can't believe I can't remember anything. I get images like from a dream where I think a car was in my lane but no witnesses so I've no idea what happened. Got my arse kicked for sure. Just hard to believe I could be dead and I wouldn't know the how of it.
I know that my mom isn't going to get better, that this is it but you keep hoping, keep trying. But there's nothing you can do except make her end of life comfortable. It just is what it is. Just needed to vent and get this crap off my chest.
50
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:07 am to BFANLC
When it rains it pours...then the flowers come out.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:10 am to BFANLC
Love on your mom until the end. They feel, hear, and in some part of their brain, understand what's happening. They just can't turn it into output. I could see the struggle in my mom's eyes when she heard something she wanted to respond to.
Talk to her, hug and kiss her, and sometimes enable her. It's there. Make it comfortable.
Sorry for your other troubles. Mom is the priority right now.
Talk to her, hug and kiss her, and sometimes enable her. It's there. Make it comfortable.
Sorry for your other troubles. Mom is the priority right now.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:12 am to BFANLC
I'm truly sorry you're having to go through all this at the same time. Life hits us that way often times. I will pray for healing for you and any peace and comfort you can possibly find during your mother's illness.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:16 am to BFANLC
Sorry to hear that man. Said a prayer for you and yours.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:23 am to BFANLC
quote:Really sorry to hear that man.
BFANLC
quote:Good on you doing it, regardless of the venue. We all need a place to vent.
Just needed to vent and get this crap off my chest.
Nothing but the best wishes for you.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:23 am to BFANLC
Sorry you are hurting, physically and emotionally.
Loosing a parent you love hits especially hard. Just be there as much as you can for her, and for yourself.
Sounds like you really had a bad accident, but you survived and will heal. The memory gap is frustrating, but I think it insulates us from the horror of the event.
Loosing a parent you love hits especially hard. Just be there as much as you can for her, and for yourself.
Sounds like you really had a bad accident, but you survived and will heal. The memory gap is frustrating, but I think it insulates us from the horror of the event.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:31 am to BFANLC
It goes downhill from here.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 12:52 am to BFANLC
Sorry man. I don't have your list of troubles but my mom died recently of dementia. It was a hard road. I miss her but she's better off now. I won't lie and say it gets better--it doesn't. But you do get better at coping with it.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 1:03 am to BFANLC
Hang in there bud, they always say it gets worse before it gets better.
Better times are ahead, just trudge thru buddy, we got ya back!!
Better times are ahead, just trudge thru buddy, we got ya back!!
Posted on 6/28/24 at 1:23 am to BFANLC
That sux just to read. Maybe we just absorb the blows better when they are spread out but it always seems like as another poster put it "when it rains it pours". It isn't of much comfort now but life will get better unless you don't allow it to. I hope you get better soon and are showered with blessings it always happens but sometimes we have to look for them and acknowledge them.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 1:41 am to BFANLC
You hang in there man. I’ve had months/ years where I felt like a black cloud was hanging over me, and have come to the conclusion that “ when it rains it pours” is some kind of unknown rule of the universe. I think in those times maybe we should marvel at the grace of a creator that made us as tough as he made us . Anyhow, talk to the board as needed, friend. It can really help to just put it out there and know people are pulling for you.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 4:02 am to BFANLC
Prayers for you and your family
This too shall pass
This too shall pass
Posted on 6/28/24 at 4:24 am to BFANLC
Probably not what you want to hear, but it could be worse. I just read a story about a guy who got in a motorcycle wreck & had to amputate his leg. You still have things to be thankful for even if it doesn’t feel like it. Hope everything gets better for you
Posted on 6/28/24 at 4:38 am to BFANLC
Glad you're alive my friend. 
Posted on 6/28/24 at 5:45 am to BFANLC
Keep fighting
Posted on 6/28/24 at 6:01 am to BFANLC
Sorry to hear about your troubles.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 6:11 am to BFANLC
Hang in there. Things will get better. I always love when I read responses like this from the board.
The OT can be a miserable place sometimes, but sometimes the good people come out in droves.
The OT can be a miserable place sometimes, but sometimes the good people come out in droves.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 6:26 am to BFANLC
Sorry to hear you have all of this going on at one time. I can't be of much help or offer much advice on most of it, but wrt your mom...prayers are with you, but I can tell you from experience that bringing in hospice will take some of the weight off of you and let you focus on loving her, spending time with her, and just trying to be the best child you can in her last days/weeks.
We lost my 86 year old mom three weeks ago tomorrow. She had been living with us since a Parkinson's diagnoses in 2017; her health had been slowly declining over the past couple of years, but really took a sharp downturn at the first of the year. Three hospital stays, on oxygen, difficulty walking, etc. The last time she went in to the hospital she had fallen getting out of bed and hit her head on her nightstand. It was during that hospital stay that we decided to move her to comfort care in the hospital and try to find a care facility to move her to under hospice.
The palliative care doctor told us on the day she went in that she had days to weeks. She was in the hospital 12 days before we found a senior care center nearby that had space for her. She had gotten a lot worse in the hospital (I honestly think their idea of comfort care was just keep her doped up and deal with other patients) and when she got to the care center had a UTI, was constipated from impacted fecal matter at the rectum, and could barely get out of bed.
The senior care facility got her eating, had her up and moving. But she was only there for 6 days before a massive stroke took her. It sucked. She actually had rallied, enough to the point that I didn't go see her that Saturday so I didn't get to see her on her last day. But the hospice care/senior care facility let me go back to being her son and not her caregiver, and it was a blessing at the end of her life.
We lost my 86 year old mom three weeks ago tomorrow. She had been living with us since a Parkinson's diagnoses in 2017; her health had been slowly declining over the past couple of years, but really took a sharp downturn at the first of the year. Three hospital stays, on oxygen, difficulty walking, etc. The last time she went in to the hospital she had fallen getting out of bed and hit her head on her nightstand. It was during that hospital stay that we decided to move her to comfort care in the hospital and try to find a care facility to move her to under hospice.
The palliative care doctor told us on the day she went in that she had days to weeks. She was in the hospital 12 days before we found a senior care center nearby that had space for her. She had gotten a lot worse in the hospital (I honestly think their idea of comfort care was just keep her doped up and deal with other patients) and when she got to the care center had a UTI, was constipated from impacted fecal matter at the rectum, and could barely get out of bed.
The senior care facility got her eating, had her up and moving. But she was only there for 6 days before a massive stroke took her. It sucked. She actually had rallied, enough to the point that I didn't go see her that Saturday so I didn't get to see her on her last day. But the hospice care/senior care facility let me go back to being her son and not her caregiver, and it was a blessing at the end of her life.
Posted on 6/28/24 at 6:33 am to BFANLC
Sorry to hear all that… try to stay strong….
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