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re: Ideas for my son to start inviting his friends to our house
Posted on 4/7/24 at 10:21 pm to Mariner
Posted on 4/7/24 at 10:21 pm to Mariner
quote:
Thankfully we are moving to a house twice the size with a playroom and will install a pool.
I'm trying to help you. The movie theater got used twice a year. The $75k pool I dumped in our backyard got used less than 25 times in three years. I also stupidly dropped $5k on a play yard which got hauled off for free 4 years later.
Kids want to be invited to where there aren't rules. They'd largely screw around at someone else's house who orders them DoorDash on demand, than be at your house with the pool, when all you have is crostini.
Don't buy a bigger vehicle for other people's kids. I'd strongly suggest not buying a bigger house for other people's kids, either.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 10:59 pm to LemmyLives
quote:
If you make kids ask you to get food out of the pantry, most of them hate you because they had to ask (sub 11 year olds.)
I don't really know what this means.
When I was a kid we got our own food out of the pantry. I likewise don't remember food being a big deal with either of my kids and their friends.
If we're talking about dinner, yeah, there would be parents involved in that decision. But if we're just talking about hanging around the house playing on the weekends or during the summer we went inside and got our own snacks if we wanted them and usually just drank water out of the hose if we got thirsty. Or poured ourselves Koo-aid or soda if we happened to be inside.
I don't remember really even bothering about lunch. Too much stuff to do.
This post was edited on 4/7/24 at 11:08 pm
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:05 pm to StringedInstruments
Yeah, no. Hard to compete maybe just make sure you and wife are cool and laid back when they are hanging out and that may make a difference.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:07 pm to LemmyLives
quote:
Kids want to be invited to where there aren't rules.
Now that we're having this discussion, I realize that this is true even when kids get older.
I remember spending the most time (by far) in high school hanging around at this one friend's house specifically because his parents left us alone and didn't bother us.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:15 pm to baseballmind1212
quote:
A 120" screen with a cheap projector hooked up to an Xbox
This would definitely pull the kids in.
A cheap white screen like a Silver Ticket, a lifestyle projector and an Xbox and/or PS5.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:19 pm to Obtuse1
quote:
This would definitely pull the kids in.
Unmonitored food and wifi pulls kids in. They don't watch shite.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:36 pm to baseballmind1212
With a golf sim, you could add a real putting green , even on a hill. And move the hole every two weeks.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:44 pm to real turf fan
quote:
move the hole every two weeks.
Sounds kinda dirty...
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:44 pm to wackatimesthree
quote:
I don't really know what this means.
you don't eat food in my house unless you ask. It's courtesy, like saying f@*$ing "please" and "thank you." Since you are of the age that drank out of the hose, like me, it may not be obvious to you that pre-teens and younger kids will run into people's houses and raid pantries and fridges without asking on the regular.
Of course you get water if you ask. Of course you get goldfish if you ask. But you F*@*ing ask, because it's not your house.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:47 pm to StringedInstruments
Man if you’re willing to drop $10k and your kid is involved in sports, just get ahead of the curve and invest in a nice home gym set up.
Nice Olympic weight set, rack, some adjustable dumbbells, get a mini fridge that you keep stocked with some Muscle Milk or whatever. Full length wall mirror, some decent Bluetooth speakers and a nice sized smart TV. The dedicated basement that is the hangout spot now will soon become lame when they start to get hair on their balls and decide they want to start chasing pussy.
The bonus is that you also get to use this equipment.
Nice Olympic weight set, rack, some adjustable dumbbells, get a mini fridge that you keep stocked with some Muscle Milk or whatever. Full length wall mirror, some decent Bluetooth speakers and a nice sized smart TV. The dedicated basement that is the hangout spot now will soon become lame when they start to get hair on their balls and decide they want to start chasing pussy.
The bonus is that you also get to use this equipment.
Posted on 4/7/24 at 11:56 pm to VictoryHill
quote:
Nice Olympic weight set, rack,
Kids don't want to hang around work.
Posted on 4/8/24 at 12:13 am to StringedInstruments
When I was growing up there were 2-3 houses all my friends hung out at
Guys I considered best friends….i could probably count on 1 hand the number of times I went to their house
Knowing their parents, I’m sure they would’ve loved hosting us. But those friends literally never invited us over so it was never on anyone’s radar. I guess you could say it was just their personality
My point is….if your son doesn’t want to have his house be the place to hang out then no matter what luxuries you have it ain’t happening
So I would talk to your son first before you spend a shite load of money. See how he feels about being the “host”
Guys I considered best friends….i could probably count on 1 hand the number of times I went to their house
Knowing their parents, I’m sure they would’ve loved hosting us. But those friends literally never invited us over so it was never on anyone’s radar. I guess you could say it was just their personality
My point is….if your son doesn’t want to have his house be the place to hang out then no matter what luxuries you have it ain’t happening
So I would talk to your son first before you spend a shite load of money. See how he feels about being the “host”
Posted on 4/8/24 at 12:20 am to Kafka
quote:
let those punks go outside and play with sticks in the dirt
Hey, a-hole, don’t forget an empty box.
Posted on 4/8/24 at 12:31 am to StringedInstruments
quote:
Anyone else go through this as a parent? Have any ideas*? Do I just have to admit we have the lame house and there’s nothing we can do?
My son turns 11 on Thursday and he’s the same as I was growing up, which sounds a lot like you’re son. It has nothing to do with y’all’s house, maybe he’s a listener, and while he likes he friends he doesn’t want them in his personal space.
This post was edited on 4/8/24 at 12:34 am
Posted on 4/8/24 at 12:42 am to LemmyLives
quote:
If you make kids ask you to get food out of the pantry, most of them hate you because they had to ask (sub 11 year olds.)
That’s a good point, and it’s true. If my son has 11 year old boys at my house I would hope my son would tell them I’m not worried about those kids going to the kitchen cabinets to get something to eat. Right or wrong, it only takes one instance for those kids to label you an arse.
This post was edited on 4/8/24 at 12:45 am
Posted on 4/8/24 at 3:38 am to StringedInstruments
I think you're pressing, alot, & just need to allow it to organically develop.
But you could have a cookout, fire, campout, paintball, laser tag, or feed them and then let them go be kids. Be the house they all come to eat.
You don't have to spend thousands of dollars to spend time with your kid (especially if he's not asking for it). Sounds like he's having a great time and enjoying his childhood. Let him.
But you could have a cookout, fire, campout, paintball, laser tag, or feed them and then let them go be kids. Be the house they all come to eat.
You don't have to spend thousands of dollars to spend time with your kid (especially if he's not asking for it). Sounds like he's having a great time and enjoying his childhood. Let him.
Posted on 4/8/24 at 4:02 am to StringedInstruments
When my kid was this age I had all the neighborhood kids over. I didn't spend tons of money besides drinks and snacks for them.
All it took was being all time qb and splitting them up in teams. Yeah they play in the yard now but they can't pass as good as a adult. Do huddles call plays.
Also would do blitz ball homerun derby. Officiate and pitch so it's not unfair. Also when they would play a game I'd setup with a cold one call balls and strikes, foul etc
I would judge dunk contest after lowering the rim all the way down. With games Referee.
Sure they play now already by themselves but 6 out ten times they'll argue about a strike they didn't agree on or stepping out of bounds or something. Also help divide teams fairly with age, ability, etc. I only had boys but girls from the neighborhood also would play. All ages. Even had seniors that lived in neighborhood and played some and if I had to I'd suit up to make it fair.
Be involved make a league, tournament etc and they will eat that shite up.
Same thing if they slept over. 1v1 madden tournament
Sanction it for them. Random draws for who plays.
Works for shooting games. Golf was probably the most played for us.
My son is 16 now so this isn't way in the past and all kids had a ps5 or xbox.
If your yard isn't suitable take them to a park or go to the neighbors house and play with them. When it's getting dark and you're about finished call a sleep over and madden tournament and they'll go straight home to ask to come.
That was long but I hope it helps you with your son. Be a kid with them again but guide them.
All it took was being all time qb and splitting them up in teams. Yeah they play in the yard now but they can't pass as good as a adult. Do huddles call plays.
Also would do blitz ball homerun derby. Officiate and pitch so it's not unfair. Also when they would play a game I'd setup with a cold one call balls and strikes, foul etc
I would judge dunk contest after lowering the rim all the way down. With games Referee.
Sure they play now already by themselves but 6 out ten times they'll argue about a strike they didn't agree on or stepping out of bounds or something. Also help divide teams fairly with age, ability, etc. I only had boys but girls from the neighborhood also would play. All ages. Even had seniors that lived in neighborhood and played some and if I had to I'd suit up to make it fair.
Be involved make a league, tournament etc and they will eat that shite up.
Same thing if they slept over. 1v1 madden tournament
Sanction it for them. Random draws for who plays.
Works for shooting games. Golf was probably the most played for us.
My son is 16 now so this isn't way in the past and all kids had a ps5 or xbox.
If your yard isn't suitable take them to a park or go to the neighbors house and play with them. When it's getting dark and you're about finished call a sleep over and madden tournament and they'll go straight home to ask to come.
That was long but I hope it helps you with your son. Be a kid with them again but guide them.
Posted on 4/8/24 at 5:02 am to StringedInstruments
Have the snacks!
Posted on 4/8/24 at 5:34 am to LemmyLives
quote:
Don't buy a bigger vehicle for other people's kids. I'd strongly suggest not buying a bigger house for other people's kids
I appreciate the advice but I am not moving to a bigger house just to have kids over, but it is a nice to have. I am moving because we have been busting at the seams for the past five years and this past Christmas was the breaking point. It's also not a budget issue.
Posted on 4/8/24 at 5:56 am to StringedInstruments
You could take them somewhere. They might enjoy a picnic or fishing.
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