re: Dumb things that piss you off

I have a ton, but that’s because I’m a micr-managing prick

Loading the utensils in the dishwasher either or both upside down and mismatched. Last thing I want to do is stab myself on an upside down fork only to have to separate knives, forks, spoons, etc. They should be sharp end down and loaded like/like.

People that give 3 or 4 car lengths at red lights, stop signs, etc. There’s truly no reason this pisses me off but it does.

Lights, and yes I’m old, but the f’ing lights. I swear I could turn every light off and miraculously every one is back on in 10 minutes. I just don’t understand. I’m pretty sure my wife and kids have started a “make dad pissed” club that meet secretly while I’m at work. I’ve tried to get my 3 yo to tell me the truth but then she leaned in and whispered “snitches get stitches” so evidently they’re hardcore.

shite on the floor. I say shite bc that’s the only word that accurately describes it. How, when I go to bed, the floors are glistening clean but when I come home the next day there are food remnants, pebbles (and we have no pebbles), doll heads(my 3 yo pulls the heads off her Barbie dolls when she can’t brush their hair), every single dish towel we own(3 yo uses them as blankets for her babies when they’re laying on the floor for nap time…sounds adorable but it looks like a morgue), and hair. Oh the hair…I know it’s impossible to curtail this but with 4 women/girls there is literally hair everywhere. I put my foot through the ceiling last week because a hair was tickling my neck while I was tight walking a joist and I, irrationally, lost my cool.

people typing 'should of' instead of 'should have' or should've'

Slow golfers. When there’s a group in the fairway and a group on the box…you don’t need to look at your 6ft putt from 3 directions.

People that walk down the middle of the lane in the parking lot on the way to their car. Pick a side a-hole!

I hate when people are hyper corrective of what they prefer to be called. Like calling a guy Tony who is named Anthony just one time and they say something like “my name is Anthony” or “I prefer to be called Anthony” frick them. You just sound like a prick and I am being friendly. Now I just won’t talk to you because you’re a dick.

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People who stare at their phone while driving in general

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FIFY

Humidity

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At a busy gas station when people leave their vehicle at the pump to go inside after they're done fueling up

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If the lazy fricks working there would keep the receipt paper filled, I won’t have to go inside at all.

People not using blinkers

People that infiltrate neighborhoods for Halloween candy and park on both sides of the road, limiting access for residents, taking 30 minutes to get kid down the road for another function in nearby neighborhood. Same people parking in middle of road to let kids out for trick or treating versus walking the hood.