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Message
2
Posted on 8/13/15 at 10:59 pm to sleepytime
If your marriage were to end bc of someone cheating, would you rather cheat on your wife (could you live with yourself), or would you rather her cheat on you (let her live with that)?
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:02 pm to Smalls
quote:
I would want to know.
Yes. I would want to know.
That fact does not change the reality that going out and interjecting yourself into other people's lives by spilling shite like that makes you an a-hole.
Let me let you in on a bit of a secret(that's no secret at all)............there are people that are VERY happily married today where one or both of them cheated 10 years ago and neither knows about it.
Mind your own f'n business.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:04 pm to ShortyRob
quote:
Let me let you in on a bit of a secret(that's no secret at all)............there are people that are VERY happily married today where one or both of them cheated 10 years ago and neither knows about it.
Mind your own f'n business.
How many do you know? And how many would you say there are in proportion to the amount of marriages you know? And also, did the marriages last? Sounds like that story has yet to be written...
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:08 pm to Smalls
One and done... No! An affair yes. I have always felt guys that fed up once and felt guilty eventually telling the wife were cowards. They made that and should carry it.
I mess up once I am a carrying it to my grave. She is too good a woman to hear or know about that crap. I pray that never happens.
I mess up once I am a carrying it to my grave. She is too good a woman to hear or know about that crap. I pray that never happens.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:22 pm to ShermanTxTiger
quote:
She is too good a woman to hear or know about that crap.
That doesnt make sense. "She is such a good woman, so she doesn't deserve the truth" ? Is that what I'm hearing? You dont think she deserves your honesty? You'd rather lie to her, and hide things from her because she's "such a good woman" ? You sir, have no clue, and I am saddened by such a statement. You'd be the coward for having the affair in the first place because you're not strong enough to control yourself, and not wise enough to realize what you have. Holy shite your comment makes my skin scrawl. Who raised you? Son of a bitch man.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:40 pm to tiggerthetooth
I have never cheated once in 27 years of marriage. But if it happened by some weird f up on my part I wouldn't want to bring my wife into that crap. We humans like to get shite off our chests to feel better. What is hard is carrying it to the grave. I would never tell my wife if it happened. Not to save me, but to save her. I would also not want to know in a reverse scenario.
She messes up and decides she wants to stay with me (one time) I prefer not to know. She falls in love with another man or is screwing around...please let me out.
She messes up and decides she wants to stay with me (one time) I prefer not to know. She falls in love with another man or is screwing around...please let me out.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:44 pm to tiggerthetooth
quote:
How many do you know? And how many would you say there are in proportion to the amount of marriages you know? And also, did the marriages last? Sounds like that story has yet to be written...
LOL. Dude. The number of 80+ year olds who have died after 50+ years of marriage when one or both had a cheating epside is DEFINITELY not insignificant.
Simple rule. You can't see behind closed doors. When you see something go down and get all righteously indignant, remember that reality. No matter what you see or think you see, you likely don't know 10% of the situation.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:46 pm to tiggerthetooth
quote:Actually, it makes HEAPS of sense.
That doesnt make sense. "She is such a good woman, so she doesn't deserve the truth"
Stop living in unicorn land.
Men who tell their wives AFTER the fact do NOT do it for their wives. They do it to ease their own fricking conscience(and vice versa).
You realize you love the woman and you fricked up? Good. Treat her like a fricking queen for the next 40 years.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:52 pm to ShortyRob
quote:
Actually, it makes HEAPS of sense.
Stop living in unicorn land.
Men who tell their wives AFTER the fact do NOT do it for their wives. They do it to ease their own fricking conscience(and vice versa).
You realize you love the woman and you fricked up? Good. Treat her like a fricking queen for the next 40 years.
Unicorn land? Unicorn land is something that doesn't exist FYI. You would be expecting your SO to believe in something (your faithfulness) that doesnt exist (you are not faithful, therefore she would believe in something that isnt true).
I dont see how Im in unicorn land.
quote:
Men who tell their wives AFTER the fact do NOT do it for their wives. They do it to ease their own fricking conscience(and vice versa).
And thats sad. Not everyone is selfish like you. Im sorry you were raised to be so selfish and only doing for others because it benefits you somehow. I would think that you actually cared about your wife's well-being? (isn't that why you got married?) And that's why you'd tell her? And you wouldnt want her to think you're faithful, because you wouldnt actually be faithful?
You know what though. Who am I to talk? Being selfless and honest with my SO is just CRAZY. Im out of my mind to think I should be honest.
Posted on 8/13/15 at 11:56 pm to tiggerthetooth
quote:If you love someone and they love you and you frick up but realize you fricked up.................THEN, you tell her which ruins your love for good..........just so you can tell yourself you're so much better than everyone else..........you're an arse.
You know what though. Who am I to talk? Being selfless and honest with my SO is just CRAZY. Im out of my mind to think I should be honest.
I'm not saying I approve of cheating. But, that shite is YOUR monkey when you do it. Telling your wife after the fact when at that moment, she is kinda hoping your marriage LASTS is nothing more than saying, "here honey, this monkey on my back is pain in the arse..........you carry it".
Posted on 8/14/15 at 6:07 am to ShortyRob
Yes, and I would want to know as soon as possible. Since this is about the other thread, I would like to know from a stranger. That would be far better than a friend. I would much rather associate getting the knowledge from someone I didn't know than one of my friends.
Let's be honest about this, you aren't going to get a straight answer from the cheater, they will even attempt to lie when you catch them in the act. Especially if they are cheating on a marriage. Piece of shits deserve to be outed by any means necessary.
Let's be honest about this, you aren't going to get a straight answer from the cheater, they will even attempt to lie when you catch them in the act. Especially if they are cheating on a marriage. Piece of shits deserve to be outed by any means necessary.
This post was edited on 8/14/15 at 6:14 am
Posted on 8/14/15 at 6:53 am to ShermanTxTiger
quote:W
I have always felt guys that fed up once and felt guilty eventually telling the wife were cowards
T
F
quote:Too good a woman to know about it, but not too good to cheat on, seems like sound logic.
I mess up once I am a carrying it to my grave. She is too good a woman to hear or know about that crap
Posted on 8/14/15 at 6:55 am to tiggerthetooth
quote:And in the very same post, he's telling you that you live in unicorn land.
would be expecting your SO to believe in something (your faithfulness) that doesnt exist
Talk about a lack of self awareness.
Posted on 8/14/15 at 8:00 am to tiggerthetooth
quote:
That doesnt make sense. "She is such a good woman, so she doesn't deserve the truth"
I am going to have to agree with Sherman and ShortyRob on this one.
You seem to value the truth a lot. Do you tell your wife she looks fat in that dress? When your wife makes a dinner that you don't care for do you tell her it is crap and throw it away?
Posted on 8/14/15 at 8:44 am to Smalls
Honestly, if it was something she did once, or even just every now and then, every couple of years or so, say...
As long as she was safe about it, and it was purely about just needing something different every once in awhile (no "emotions" or whatever), I can't sit here and say I'd be thrilled about it, but, what I don't know won't hurt me.
I've been with the wife for 7 years. I love her like crazy, and I don't cheat. But I can't say it's never tempting. As much as I love her, sometimes I still get the itch for a little variety. I just never follow through. I love steak. But every once in awhile I still want chicken, just for a change of pace.
That said, I also don't think she's cheated. I've been cheated on in the past, and on some level, for some reason, I could always just tell it was happening before i found out. I don't believe in any of that shite, but it was almost like you could "sense" it. I'm sure it's subconscious clues. Body language or something. I've never even had the slightest suspicion that the wife cheats, and she's a traveling ER nurse, gone for a week or 2 weeks at a time.
As long as she was safe about it, and it was purely about just needing something different every once in awhile (no "emotions" or whatever), I can't sit here and say I'd be thrilled about it, but, what I don't know won't hurt me.
I've been with the wife for 7 years. I love her like crazy, and I don't cheat. But I can't say it's never tempting. As much as I love her, sometimes I still get the itch for a little variety. I just never follow through. I love steak. But every once in awhile I still want chicken, just for a change of pace.
That said, I also don't think she's cheated. I've been cheated on in the past, and on some level, for some reason, I could always just tell it was happening before i found out. I don't believe in any of that shite, but it was almost like you could "sense" it. I'm sure it's subconscious clues. Body language or something. I've never even had the slightest suspicion that the wife cheats, and she's a traveling ER nurse, gone for a week or 2 weeks at a time.
Posted on 8/14/15 at 8:50 am to PPL
Hello, real life Hank Evans, one day the Charlie in you will awaken.
Posted on 8/14/15 at 8:58 am to Dam Guide
quote:
Let's be honest about this, you aren't going to get a straight answer from the cheater, they will even attempt to lie when you catch them in the act. Especially if they are cheating on a marriage. Piece of shits deserve to be outed by any means necessary.
M*fing this. No matter how "morally upstanding" you think your SO, once they have tasted someone else's dick/pussy, then all bets are off. How can someone actually believe that it won't happen again - or still happening?
Posted on 8/14/15 at 9:04 am to sleepytime
quote:
Frick yes I would want to know and I wouldn't be mad at the person who told me.I would be skeptical, but I wouldn't be mad.
This
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