re: Would you rather stay home than visit SO and her family?

I've been dealing with this from a little different angle.

My SO parents live about 90 min away. Usually once a month or so, on a Sunday, we will drive there in the morning, have lunch, hang out for the afternoon, then head back in the late afternoon.

I generally like my in-laws.

My wife, and her mother, love to shop. So sometimes, after lunch, they will decide to go shopping. Which is fine - I am 100 percent ok with her having time with her mother - they are pretty close.

The problem is, that usually results in me, and the kids, hanging out at the in-laws house, for 3-4 hours, with FIL.

I like FIL, but he's getting up there in age, and often takes an afternoon nap. I'm bored, the kids are bored, etc.

After the last such time this happened, I had a convo with SO which basically had me saying, look, I know you want to shop with your mom, so next time, just head up by yourself and let me and the kids hang out at home for the day (or do something else). She got all upset basically saying it wasn't fair to her in-laws for the kids and me to stay at home since "they love seeing us" and that she hates driving somewhat long distances by herself (which is true).

If you are truly setious about wanting to eventually marry this woman then you need to spend some time with her family, for at least the holidays. If you dont, its going to cause alot of problems down the road. Besides, how hard is it to get to know someone over a beer or drink? Or watching a football game together? There has to be “something” you and her family can talk about. Instead of having the mindset that you dont want yo be there, have an open mind and maybe youll realize that they are pretty nice people and pleasant to be around.

Lucky for me, my in-laws live nearby and are pretty awesome. In fact, I dislike going visit my own family more than my in-laws most of the time.

I think some of you are blowing this up a bit.

I like her family, they like me. We know each other well. We’ve spent quite a bit of time with them. We stayed with her sister and brother for extended periods of time.

I’m just saying, not feeling it over this break. Once I get back home tomorrow, I am coming back up here Friday to bring my dad to the Alamo Bowl. That will be my third back and forth trip to SA this week.

You are doing the right thing.

It's always a trap

It'll change with time. You said y'all have future plans...once those plans kick into gear and you get some lil TexasTigers running around the house, you're wife will be much more agreeable with the idea of just staying home. But now? You're not married, no kids, and really have no good excuse not to go.

My wife's family is in South Georgia. When I got transferred to Atlanta, the wife was ecstatic to be moving closer to home. That first year or two, we went down there at least once a month. It was a major pain in the arse but wife felt obligated. Like a light switch, she just decided we were wasting too much of our time on the road going down there so often.

Sometimes you just have to go along to get along while hoping things will shake out on their own as y'all get older.

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I’m not a huge fan of the drive up and drive back in a short amount of time thing, especially since we are on break.

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What.A.Pussy.


You said it was only a 2.5 hour drive. That's day trip length right there.

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What.A.Pussy.

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fricking apologize right this minute.