re: What's been the toughest emotional struggle of your life?

quote:

---

diagnosed as borderline

---

This is some real shite. Mine is watching the mother of my children I'm divorcing passing this behavior to my 9 year old daughter. She deals in only black and white - no gray area to her. If my daughter loves me then she interprets that as our daughter hating her. Any affection towards me is interpreted as a rejection of her. She takes no responsibility for the marriage falling apart and paints me as the bad father who abandoned his children. And my little girl is having severe anxiety and regression because she perceives that if she's with me then nobody is taking care of her helpless mother. It's abusive and sadistic that she feels validated to see her daughter in such pain. Therapy has begun for my daughter and for me to learn how to deal with a raging borderline.

Good on you for seeking behavioral therapy and I wish you the best with it.

quote:

---

borderline

---

i don't know much about this

We were told over and over by doctors that we’d have a stillborn child. Being there for my wife and trying to keep myself composed was probably the toughest thing I’ve ever had to do. That same child is turning 8 in August.

My dad lost his fight with cancer in January this year. Thinking about him everyday and I still get teary eyes. I bought a house in March and had to remodel the kitchen before we moved in. My father in law helped me when he could which I am forever grateful. But It was very hard for me to do and not have my Dad helping me. He and I always worked on things together and him no longer being here got me choked up a few times while working on my house.

Thank you

I’m so glad your daughter is in therapy. Borderline can be passed down genetically and caused by the borderlines treatment of the child

They are only recently starting to diagnose bpd in kids younger than 18. I would recommend a good dbt program as soon as possible. It was life changing for me. Plus I think it can be an effective form of therapy for anyone struggling with emotional issues. They’re starting to use it even in depression

Having kid number 2. Love them both more than anything, but I seriously question if I can do it a few times a week.

Bi-Racial kids usually subconsciously “ choose” a race.They Identity more one way or the other. My girls Identity more asian than white because of strong Asian family influence. My son maybe a bit more Identifying white like his Pops. Which isn’t a problem for any race except for blacks, because blacks uniquely have bought into phony race consciousness . All that is garbage. You just keep being you, man.

quote:

---

but I have a feeling this move will only help to prove that I am the problem and I have to actually change myself and my habits in a major way while also acknowledging that I lack the will power to do so because I’m weirdly punishing myself for reasons I no longer remember or ever understood.

---

you should try meditating, it will help you.

i've got a lot of the same tendencies as you and i think you're a few years younger than me, so if i could impart any wisdom... i think your focus will color your view of the world. focus on the positive and don't let your mind cross over into obsession/compulsion. it's difficult, but it can be done with practice. quiet the mind, break up any bad patterns and don't hold on to negative thoughts

quote:

---

All that is garbage. You just keep being you, man.

---

The first couple times I tried to have sex, I couldn’t get a boner