re: What is the worst hook up experience you have ever had?

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That happened to me once.

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I've got one worse. The more I read this thread the more shite I remember that I've forgotten about

Once on a duck hunting trip in Arkansas, we went out to a bar one night. I met this decent looking chick, IRL 6 or so, and went to her house rather than the hotel since my 2 friends were staying in the same room with me.

I get there, and we get to making out. Then she yanks all of the sheets off the bed and pulls out another set of sheets from her closet. She puts them on the bed and I see that they are made of latex...i ask her you must be a squirter or something. She goes no.... pauses, and then goes on to tell me how she is into watersports and wants me to piss all over her.

Needless to say I GTFO and decided to stick to duck hunting the rest of the trip

I would have hit it then said "I'm going to smoke real quick, I'll be right back and hauled arse.

Another weird story with a cougar who took me to her place from a bar. All was good until I found she was on her period. Oh well, I'm drunk AF and going to hit this. She then wanted me to eat her out. "Lol no". Then tried to guilt me into it. Basically called me a pussy for not doing it but still let me hit. I got up when I was done and pissed in her living room. I realized I had no fricking clue where I was but had to GTFO. Ended up walking down the road and having a friend come get me.

I was on spring break in Panama City one time...went into Harpoon Harrys and this drunk chick from Minnesota starts dancing with me. We go out to my truck and get busy in the back seat. I hear a tap on my window and it's a tow truck guy informing me that I can't park there and I have to move my truck.

So I get out, butt naked with a raging hard on, look the tow truck guy in the eyes and say "I'm not happy to see you right now" then I get in the drivers seat, with all of the traffic honking at me, and move my truck a block away. I finish my business.

Now in the meantime, my friends get kicked out of the bar because one of them in their drunken genius was caught pissing off of the balcony upstairs. My phone was dead. They couldn't find my truck since i had to move it and had to walk 2 miles back to the hotel. They were pissed until I told them the story

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deltaland

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Oh you woulda been buying beers the rest of the trip!

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You should have at least pissed on her. I mean, how many chances do you get to check that block?

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This one slut we Brought home from that mega club City Streets in Houston and we tag team her at her condo. In morning I wake up and they are in shower frickin. She comes out before him and I make out with her and finger bang her for a minute before we leave. He gets in the car and goes 'man that slut made me pee all in her face in the shower.'

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Yeah why didn't you just catch a nutt then piss on her? Not like she was doing it to you.

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Welllll..... she wanted to do it to me too TBH

Canadian chick I met in Whistler with burn scars over 90% of her body wouldn't let me hit it and then insisted on violently thumping the bean while I pretended to be asleep.

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My worst was all in one night in New Orleans. I fricked 2 strippers, 1 prostitute, and got robbed by an escort.

I was down for a conference one weekend. Stayed at Hotel Monteleone. I went out one night after having some drinks at the conference dinner...got drunk on Bourbon St...took a couple xanax. Went into a strip club and got a lap dance for 200 and the stripper put a condom on me and rode my dick till I came. I was kinda shocked they'd do that in the dance room, but I liked it so I went and found a hotter dancer and gave her 200. She gave me a line of coke to snort off her arse cheek then fricked me like the previous stripper did. So good night so far.

I head back to my hotel, and a girl who is drunk off her arse grabs my arm. I'm hammered and can barely walk. She wants to come to my room and I'm thinking she is just some drunk chick wanting to frick..so I take her up there and frick her. Then she demands payment and I'm like "You didn't tell me that beforehand I don't have any cash on me" and finally she agreed to me just ordering a burger through room service for her as payment.

Now it's about 3 a.m and I'm like frick it I always wanted to get an escort off of backpage and I'm jacked up on coke and can't sleep. So I call one up who looks pretty good. She gets to the room, gets naked and sucks my dick. I had already paid her 175 bucks...then I find out i don't have any more condoms. She offers to run down the street and buy some and come back and me in my drunken stupor don't think about her having my money. Bitch ran off with the cash and never came back. I was pissed and had maxed out my ATM withdraw limit and had to call the bank the next day to let me use my card so I could get gas to drive home

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Charlie Sheen is that you?

Vampires