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arseinclarse
USA Fan
Gentilly
Member since Apr 2007
29711 posts

The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

All reports are taken from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission’s database of emergency room visits, and all descriptions are verbatim. Objects are sorted by orifice, working south:


quote:

PENIS
CRAYONS
MARKER CAP
CHOPSTICK
BALLPOINT PEN
PIECE OF TOY PLIERS
LOLLIPOP STICK
COAXIAL CABLE
WEDDING RING
MAGNETS
SCREWDRIVER
BOBBY PIN, “UNABLE TO ACHIEVE ERECTION & THOUGHT IT WOULD HELP”


VAGINA
TOOTHBRUSH
“A METAL AND PLASTIC CONTAINER”
TAPE
“WAS BEING ARRESTED BY THE POLICE SO SHE TOOK HER CELL PHONE AND HID IT FROM THEM - STUCK IT IN HER VAGINA”
PERFUME BOTTLE
MAKEUP SPONGE
LARGE PIECE OF UNDERWEAR
TOY ACTION FIGURE
RUBBER BALL
“JUMPED OFF COUCH LANDED ON SPOON”


RECTUM
“PATIENT STATES HE STATES SLIPPED IN THE SHOWER AND LANDED ON A METAL AIR FRESHENER CAN AND IT WENT INTO RECTUM”
FOLDING KNIFE
PLASTIC TOY, “ABOUT 6 INCHES LONG”
TOOTHPICK
TOOTHBRUSH
TOOTHBRUSH HOLDER
PLUNGER HANDLE
MATTRESS FOAM
TWO RAZOR BLADES
TWO SMALL VIBRATORS
TURKEY BASTER
CONDOM WRAPPER
COAT HANGER, “PATIENT UNSURE HOW IT GOT THERE”
GARDEN HOSE CAP
CIGARETTE LIGHTER
TOY HOCKEY STICK
WATER GUN
BAG OF HEROIN
COINS
EGG TIMER
SMALL SHAMPOO BOTTLE
LARGE SHAMPOO BOTTLE
LIGHT BULB
APPLE SAUCE CAN
“ACCIDENTALLY GOT A DILDO LODGED IN RECTUM & CUT THE END OF THE DILDO OFF”
“STUCK A 4 INCH BUTT PLUG UP RECTUM YESTERDAY, HANDLE BROKE. HE CONTINUED TO PUSH THE TOY IN”
“WAS USING PROSTATE MASSAGER & IT GOT 'SUCKED IN'”'
CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT


Image: https://media1.giphy.com/media/NnGGHE0muVqpO/source.gif


MorbidTheClown
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Jan 2015
37462 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
what about the bottle from the thread earlier this month?

Image: https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2019/12/19/10/22445684-7808967-image-a-12_1576750180357.jpg
This post was edited on 12/27 at 10:19 am


cgrand
New Orleans Pelicans Fan
HAMMOND
Member since Oct 2009
21945 posts
 Online 

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
deadspin is dead
long live deadspin


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90
fallguy_1978
LSU Fan
Half mile from St George
Member since Feb 2018
25655 posts
 Online 

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

WEDDING RING

How does this even happen? A q-tip hurt bad enough.


4LSU2
LSU Fan
Madisonville
Member since Dec 2009
35314 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

PATIENT STATES HE STATES SLIPPED IN THE SHOWER AND LANDED ON A METAL AIR FRESHENER CAN AND IT WENT INTO RECTUM”


Interesting.


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180
Slingin Pickle
LSU Fan
Fancy side of the North Shore
Member since Jun 2008
2099 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
I feel like there should be a lot more vagina stuff


miamitiger
LSU Fan
Member since Aug 2011
1887 posts
 Online 

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

SMALL SHAMPOO BOTTLE 
LARGE SHAMPOO BOTTLE 


What are the odds being same person?


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280
arseinclarse
USA Fan
Gentilly
Member since Apr 2007
29711 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

what about the bottle from the thread earlier this month?


Haven't found the Chinese reports. I imagine it's as thick as an encyclopedia set.
This post was edited on 12/27 at 10:38 am


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40
arseinclarse
USA Fan
Gentilly
Member since Apr 2007
29711 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

a lot more vagina stuff


Old, worn out pussy is hard to trap things in.


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160
High C
Houston Astros Fan
viewing the fall....
Member since Nov 2012
33112 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019


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230
Jim Rockford
LSU Fan
Member since May 2011
77806 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

I feel like there should be a lot more vagina stuff


Women are crazy, but there are more weirdo men.


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40
Dudley Humptyfrats
LSU Fan
'Murica
Member since Oct 2010
1283 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

PENIS
quote:

COAXIAL CABLE

Comcast is getting out of hand


Boring
Member since Feb 2019
1531 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019


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150
MorbidTheClown
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Jan 2015
37462 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

I feel like there should be a lot more vagina stuff


yep..if i had one everything in the house would be labeled fits or does not fit.


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240
Lawyered
Ole Miss Fan
The Sip
Member since Oct 2016
8238 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

WAS USING PROSTATE MASSAGER & IT GOT 'SUCKED IN'”'


Rookie mistake... gotta keep your hands at 10 and 2... one on the 10 inch sex toy and one on your two inch cock


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120
eScott
LSU Fan
Member since Oct 2008
10313 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

WEDDING RING


Best way to propose.


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50
PrivatePublic
TBD Fan
Member since Nov 2012
16009 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
Any other guys that read this thread skip immediately over the penis stuff or is it just me?


LegendInMyMind
Member since Apr 2019
5865 posts
 Online 

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
One of my favorite "end of year" lists. Thanks!


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60
fr33manator
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Oct 2010
94807 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

I feel like there should be a lot more vagina stuff



You can usually just stick your fist in to get that stuff out


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30
Sasquatch Smash
LSU Fan
Member since Nov 2007
10611 posts

re: The things we shoved up our vaginas, penises and arses in 2019
quote:

VAGINA

MAKEUP SPONGE


Someone was on their rag and trying to frick. It's what the pornstars do. Perhaps it was a pornstar.


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