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re: Scenario: If you were dating a girl for <1 year, got her pregnant- Would you marry?
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:41 am to pvilleguru
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:41 am to pvilleguru
quote:
How's it harsh if neither of us wanted a kid in the first place?
Harsh on the life you're discarding because you fricked up, is my point
0
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:41 am to poncho villa
quote:
If you were dating a girl for <1 year, got her pregnant- Would you marry?
Are we talking 3rd date, or 11 months in?
I agree with many in here that you don't need to be married to raise a kid together. At a minimum, I would insist that we live together (if we already were not). I would not rush into marriage for the sake of being married; but we may get engaged.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:41 am to poncho villa
quote:
Assuming that you thought it through and decided that you wouldn't mind marrying her in the first place?
If you didn't see yourself wanting to marry her, would you do it anyways or is that like shooting yourself in the foot twice?
Dude, I get it.
You're soul searching.
It's hard growing up without a dad.
You really need to stop this though.
I told your mom I didn't even want a kid.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:42 am to RebelExpress38
quote:
People who say no in this situation are the reason the US is crippled by baby mamas on welfare and kids growing up without dads. Actions have consequences.
Look I get that homeboy already fricked up once by knocking up the broad, don’t double down and frick up again by marrying this random girl.
Be there for the child and be the best dad you can be. If you eventually marry the girl for the right reasons, cool. If not, oh well.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:43 am to Fat and Happy
quote:
Co-parenting is easy.
What’s your sample size? Co-parenting is HIGHLY dependent on the other parent. I have heard nightmares.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:44 am to texasmason
quote:
This isn't the 1950's anymore.
Okay, but would you say we are more or less functional as a society than we were in the 1950's? Like it or not, the nuclear family unit plays a large part in developing well-balanced future humans. Can we all agree that our national uptick in crime and general degeneracy (particularly among boys) is strongly correlated to absent fathers?
A woman cannot get pregnant without a man. The second this happens, that girl becomes his family, as she is now the mother of his child, for better or worse.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:45 am to poncho villa
quote:
Assuming that you thought it through and decided that you wouldn't mind marrying her in the first place?
If you didn't see yourself wanting to marry her, would you do it anyways or is that like shooting yourself in the foot twice?
Where does she land on the crazy/hot matrix?
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:46 am to HouseMom
quote:
A woman cannot get pregnant without a man
Artificial insemination.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:48 am to pvilleguru
quote:
WTF
Just something for him to think about in the shower
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:48 am to HouseMom
quote:
Okay, but would you say we are more or less functional as a society than we were in the 1950's?
We're you drinking out of the whites or colored water fountain in the 1950s?
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:50 am to Weekend Warrior79
One thing about not marrying her - you're arguably leaving your child at the mercy of a single mom who is going to have all sorts of societal/cultural roadblocks and hurdles going forward. If I didn't marry her I'd be praying she finds a decent guy who will.
By marrying her at least you have some control over that. You succeeding means she and your kid succeed. I don't think the same necessarily applies based on you paying child support or paying for a better school, although it can help.
Obviously marrying a psychopath isn't going to help, but I've seen reasonable women turn into complete nuts with little chance of stabilizing their lives, and the most common factor there is having a kid and not being married.
By marrying her at least you have some control over that. You succeeding means she and your kid succeed. I don't think the same necessarily applies based on you paying child support or paying for a better school, although it can help.
Obviously marrying a psychopath isn't going to help, but I've seen reasonable women turn into complete nuts with little chance of stabilizing their lives, and the most common factor there is having a kid and not being married.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:50 am to jdd48
quote:
I would have coated up and avoided that, but here we are. I guess most people just don't use condoms anymore. You hear about this all the time these days.
You know shite still happens and you can get a woman pregnant even if you wear a condom, right?
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:50 am to pvilleguru
quote:
Artificial insemination.
You may want to Google this. I'm not sure it means what you think it means. Again, an actual man is necessary for human conception.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:52 am to HouseMom
quote:
You may want to Google this. I'm not sure it means what you think it means. Again, an actual man is necessary for human conception
But she doesn't "become part of his family." He's strictly a donor. No different than donating blood or a kidney.
This post was edited on 7/6/21 at 8:53 am
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:52 am to HouseMom
quote:
Again, an actual man is necessary for human conception.
But based on your antiquated logic….the guy from the sperm bank should marry the woman who selected him as a sperm donor since you say they will forever be family
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:54 am to baldona
quote:
On a similar note, a woman has to be completely fricking stupid to let someone cum inside her if she isn’t using reliable birth control or willing to take plan B.
Bi9ngo we have a winner..
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:55 am to DiamondDog
quote:A lot of good advice, comes from people's life experiences. You dad shared some of his.
My father told me growing up you never marry a woman just because you knock her up.
True story.
Whether that’s right or not I’ll leave that to the peanut gallery.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:56 am to RebelExpress38
quote:
Actions have consequences.
So does marriage, no sense in potentially doubling down on a bad mistake and risking half your shite. I would definitely wait and see if she really was marriage material, I wouldn’t marry her just because I knocked her up.
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:59 am to Nigel Farage
quote:
wouldn’t marry her just because I knocked her up.
And how many people do we know personally who married just because they got pregnant….and are still married now???
What would have been worse for the child….growing up with a single parent but other parent involved in the child’s life.
Or
Growing up with parents who had no business being married to one another who end up putting child through trauma of divorce??
Posted on 7/6/21 at 8:59 am to poncho villa
Its REALLY not that difficult to not get pregnant.
Its terribly weak the risk folks are willing to take for their own momentary pleasure....but I guess its not really a risk if you don't have to actually deal with the consequences.
Its terribly weak the risk folks are willing to take for their own momentary pleasure....but I guess its not really a risk if you don't have to actually deal with the consequences.
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