re: Nastiest thing you've ever seen or heard of.

My first duty assignment was McConnell AFB. There was a sewage lift station on base that had an in-line pH probe that we had to calibrate every so often.

We were called out by the water department from the civil engineering squadron on base to let us know that they were getting ready to pull and clean the probe, and asked us if we could calibrate.

I showed up before they did and watched pull the probe and it had a condom stuck on it. Fella from the water shop pulled the condom off of the probe with no gloves on. I offered him some gloves and said he didn’t need them. We stood around bs’ing while waiting on the probe to do its thing and I watched this dude reach into a pouch of Redman and grab himself a chew.

I almost lost it. I finished up calibrating it and watched him put that probe back in with no gloves again. I walked off before he had a chance to try to shake my hand.

Jar squatters.

Seen:

When we moved, the (full) fridge was the last thing in the house. The compressor died, and the freezer full of meat and seafood sat for about 3 weeks. I opened the freezer door and had to run out of the room to keep from throwing up. I opened up the doors to air-out the house, and within 5 minutes there were hundreds of flies everywhere. I suited-up, got everything into contractor garbage bags 30 seconds at a time while holding my breath, and dumped everything into a construction dumpster about a mile away. The smell was indescribable.

Heard of:

Vietnam. My friend was a Green Beret, deployed with ARVN Special Forces. They are out for over a week. ARVN took a medium sized dog with them. Gave it no food or water for three days. At the end of the third day, they filled a big bowl with rice and water, and the dog devoured it immediately. Then they shot the dog, set up a spit, and roasted and ate the dog, including the now full-of-rice stomach. He said that stuck with him for a long, long time.

Honorable Mention:

BR General on Bluebonnet. My MIL with a complex about going to the bathroom takes laxatives so she can do #2. Goes to the ER with horrible stomach pains, then has explosive diarrhea while in the exam room. It's on the walls, nurses are slipping on the floor, etc. You could smell it when you walked into the lobby of the ER. A river of liquid shite. They must have had to put on moon suits to clean that up.


That's the best I've got...

Grown men in their pjs working from home. Paying someone to cut their yard and wash their cars.

I was appointed on an interdiction case. Deputy and I went over to the proposed interdict's duplex. She was not home but the duplex was open. There was clothing and blankets all over the floors, and if you moved them, it was a festival of adult cockroaches (several varieties).

The walls seemed to have little spots. On further inspection, it was tiny baby roaches.

We wanted to see if she had food. The refrigerator worked but the freezer (upper unit) did not. When we opened the freezer. a flood of baby roaches came out. We said FTS and bailed out.

The most sickening part is that some local riffraff was going to that house and fricking the proposed interdict.

Most recently, and tame compared to many of these posts, the bathroom in Lot F, I believe, in Bernie Moore Track parking lot. Last game last year I came out puking, and last game this year it backed up and you couldn’t hardly stand it. They actually, thankfully brought in a truck to pump it out mid day.

But I’ve heard a dead body is the worst. Don’t ever want to experience that.