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Started By
Message
re: moving in prior to marriage
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:12 pm to redneck
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:12 pm to redneck
quote:
1-2 years?! Thats insane unless there is an accidental pregnancy.
If you meet your spouse in your late 20's to early 30's there's a lot more time pressure to make a decision if you want to try to start a family while you are still relatively young and before it gets too late.
1
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:29 pm to I Bleed Garnet
Trashy no. immoral yes
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:30 pm to jcaz
quote:
used to have space on my bathroom sink counter. Nowadays, not so much
Get a bigger bathroom sink.
Or have 2 sinks...
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:31 pm to redneck
quote:
We started dating junior year of high school so it was never even a thought until we finished up college
Damn
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:35 pm to I Bleed Garnet
Threads like this are a good reminder how dimwitted and backwoods most people on this site are.
Posted on 2/6/20 at 1:52 pm to Peazey
For a mid 20s virgin, is it too late to meet a hot , career minded nice girl? Who's not crazy . If I ever get my shite together
Posted on 2/6/20 at 2:00 pm to redneck
quote:
That being said, if you have to "test" living together to make sure the marriage will work you are not with the right person. If you are going to commit to a life long marriage you know. If you have to test it out you will end up divorced at some point
People are going to downvote you, but this is more true than most would admit.
Posted on 2/6/20 at 2:23 pm to bayoumuscle21
Here we are on page 7 and I'm having to make this post:
Pics?
Pics?
Posted on 2/6/20 at 2:24 pm to redneck
quote:
That being said, if you have to "test" living together to make sure the marriage will work you are not with the right person. If you are going to commit to a life long marriage you know. If you have to test it out you will end up divorced at some point
What about people that have lived together at some point (let's say minimum 1 year) and broke up, and then got back together? Those are always doomed to fail right? Never engaged/married.
Posted on 2/6/20 at 2:43 pm to southpawcock
quote:
What about people that have lived together at some point (let's say minimum 1 year) and broke up, and then got back together? Those are always doomed to fail right? Never engaged/married
I'm no Dr.Phil but if there is a reason you broke up once there will be many reasons in the future to break up again. Move on
Posted on 2/6/20 at 2:53 pm to I Bleed Garnet
quote:
Is it trashy to move in with your gf/bf prior to marriage
Yes. This topic gets brought up quite a bit on here
Posted on 2/6/20 at 3:00 pm to djangochained
quote:
Like a test drive
Here’s the thing, and I know most people will disagree. When you test drive a car, you’re looking for deal breakers that will cause you to decide against the car.
That’s not what’s really going on when you cohabitate. You already know if there are deal breakers just from having dated. The question that most people are trying to answer is, “how easy will it be to integrate my entire life with this person before I commit”.
The problem with this is that it is actually beneficial to learn how to do this integration upfront because you’ll basically be doing it to some degree for your entire marriage. The two of you will constantly change and constantly have to adjust to each other. When you cohabitate as a “test drive”, you’re essentially looking for a situation that will require the least amount of sacrifice and the fewest accommodations. IMO, it’s not a good way to approach marriage.
Also, even if you deem this person worthy of marriage today (based on how easy they are to live with), you have no idea what living with this person is going to be like in 10 years. Or 20. It’s just not a very useful arrangement IMO if the ultimate goal is a life-long marriage.
This post was edited on 2/6/20 at 3:02 pm
Posted on 2/6/20 at 3:27 pm to PrivatePublic
quote:
Try again bucko. Study after study over the years has concluded that cohabitation leads to higher divorce rates and newer studies show at best it makes no difference.
I never read articles or researched it, but I could pretty much tell what all of my wife's nuisances after a year.
Posted on 2/6/20 at 4:07 pm to TheDeathValley
quote:
That’s not what’s really going on when you cohabitate. You already know if there are deal breakers just from having dated. The question that most people are trying to answer is, “how easy will it be to integrate my entire life with this person before I commit”.
You learn a lot more about a person when you live with them as opposed to dating.
quote:
Also, even if you deem this person worthy of marriage today (based on how easy they are to live with), you have no idea what living with this person is going to be like in 10 years. Or 20.
I’ll agree with that. It may not tell you who that person will be in 10 or 20 years, but there is some intimate details you learn about a person when you live with them as opposed to dating.
quote:
Try again bucko. Study after study over the years has concluded that cohabitation leads to higher divorce rates and newer studies show at best it makes no difference.
It looks like this was the case leading up to the 90s and 2000s, but the trend may be starting to reverse. Not because of anything to do with cohabitation, but mostly because of age. Studies are showing that people who get married after age 23 have a higher rate of not getting a divorce. Since people are waiting longer to get married, the old trend is begging to shift. Also, education and economics play a big part as well.
TIME
Atlantic
Posted on 2/6/20 at 4:16 pm to jcaz
quote:
And prepare to ensure the toilet seat is down and clear of pube hair.
You wouldn’t do this anyway? That’s disgusting
Posted on 2/6/20 at 4:25 pm to I Bleed Garnet
Lolz at the parents who make their adult children live separately from their significant others.
They're boning. You may think you're stopping the boning, but you're probably making them bone more.
And then on top of that you are pressuring them to get married just so that they no longer have to bone in secret.
They're boning. You may think you're stopping the boning, but you're probably making them bone more.
And then on top of that you are pressuring them to get married just so that they no longer have to bone in secret.
Posted on 2/6/20 at 4:29 pm to I Bleed Garnet
Yes
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