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Message
re: Kids Calling Parents Sir and Ma'am
Posted on 5/22/17 at 3:45 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
Posted on 5/22/17 at 3:45 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
quote:
I have my 3 and 2 year olds call me Sir. For example I tell them to clean their room and they say, "Yes Sir." A friend of mine thinks it's weird and disturbing they say yes Sir to me. She believes they should be saying yes Daddy or yes Dad or something else along those lines. What does the OT think? IMO kids who don't say Sir or ma'am are from trashy families.
It's more of a southern thing. I grew up saying sir and ma'am in Alabama. Wife and I don't require it for our son. I only say sir and ma'am to my parents, uncles, and aunts back home now.
0
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:06 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
I think parents spend way too much energy trying to either A) shower their kids with a torrent of affection and/or 2) become their best friend.
If you really, like really, love your children, you should raise them to be self-sufficient, courageous, responsible people who can navigate society in a healthy way and stand on their own two feet. If you are mostly concerned with having a cute lil' buddy and making sure they know how much you wuv dem, there are dogs you can buy that will not grow up into helpless, depressed, naive snowflakes. In my estimation, the latter sort of parenting is largely responsible for a lot of the societal dysfunction we see in young adults today. Those are the sorts of parents that have a problem with "sir."
Your kid using "sir" and "ma'am" with adults immediately tells me something about him and about you, all of which is positive. It's refreshing to see a kid who knows the world doesn't revolve around him at all times. He gets some degree of immediate esteem from those kinds of things. Frankly, polite behavior with authority figures will carry you a long arse way in the future because it is now so insanely rare and not modeled by prominent figures in society.
If you really, like really, love your children, you should raise them to be self-sufficient, courageous, responsible people who can navigate society in a healthy way and stand on their own two feet. If you are mostly concerned with having a cute lil' buddy and making sure they know how much you wuv dem, there are dogs you can buy that will not grow up into helpless, depressed, naive snowflakes. In my estimation, the latter sort of parenting is largely responsible for a lot of the societal dysfunction we see in young adults today. Those are the sorts of parents that have a problem with "sir."
Your kid using "sir" and "ma'am" with adults immediately tells me something about him and about you, all of which is positive. It's refreshing to see a kid who knows the world doesn't revolve around him at all times. He gets some degree of immediate esteem from those kinds of things. Frankly, polite behavior with authority figures will carry you a long arse way in the future because it is now so insanely rare and not modeled by prominent figures in society.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:11 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
I'm a grown arse man and I still say sir and ma'am.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:21 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
Respect starts at home.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:31 pm to Tigerlaff
quote:This is hilarious. The South is the only place where sir/ma'am is prevalent, and it's the most depraved region. Look at any social indicator and southern states will make up the majority of the bottom.
In my estimation, the latter sort of parenting is largely responsible for a lot of the societal dysfunction we see in young adults today. Those are the sorts of parents that have a problem with "sir."
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:39 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
My kids say sir and maam.
Don't know about the other kids who don't say sir or maam being from trashy families though.
Don't know about the other kids who don't say sir or maam being from trashy families though.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:44 pm to GreatLakesTiger24
quote:
This is hilarious. The South is the only place where sir/ma'am is prevalent, and it's the most depraved region. Look at any social indicator and southern states will make up the majority of the bottom.
If you read the post again, slowly, you'll see that the first part of the post deals with my opinion that:
quote:
I think parents spend way too much energy trying to either A) shower their kids with a torrent of affection and/or 2) become their best friend.
The second part of the post talks about how "sir" and "ma'am" is one of the indicators that may suggest you are not dealing with the poor parents described in the first paragraph.
Just give it another shot and get back to me.
This post was edited on 5/22/17 at 4:45 pm
Posted on 5/22/17 at 4:57 pm to Tigerlaff
I grew up thinking yeswhat was a word. Whether I was speaking to my parents or another adult, if Injust said yes, I knew yes what was coming from my father.
I appreciate that now. I think it is a show of respect.
I appreciate that now. I think it is a show of respect.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:03 pm to Tigerlaff
Why are all kinds of northerners moving down here if our ways are backwards and at the lowest social indicators?
Screw that.
Yes sir/yes ma'am for the win, we value human beings and their inherent dignity. We show it with manners.
Screw that.
Yes sir/yes ma'am for the win, we value human beings and their inherent dignity. We show it with manners.
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:04 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
Your friend is a snowflake enabler.
Teach your children manners and respect for elders
It will serve them well in business and life in general
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:06 pm to Willie Stroker
quote:
Why do you need these words to feel respected? From my perspective, the need to reinforce a right or wrong way to address you is more of an ego problem than a parental issue
As a parent, it's not so much about respect for you, it's about respect for others and social norms. Ego doesn't have much to do with it. Like I said in an earlier post, I haven't taught my kids to do it because, frankly, it's just considered odd where I live. But if I lived in the south I would damn sure have them say it. Not for my benefit, but theirs.
This post was edited on 5/22/17 at 5:12 pm
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:44 pm to northshorebamaman
It is definitely regional. The southern and country parts of Missouri held on to it. But most places here it would seem out of place. You can be polite and respectful with please and thank you. Same with using "Mr.".
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:47 pm to Tigerlaff
quote:
I think parents spend way too much energy trying to either A) shower their kids with a torrent of affection and/or 2) become their best friend.
What about the parents who get enjoyment from beating the shite out of their kids then bragging about it?
Posted on 5/22/17 at 5:51 pm to Peazey
quote:
Or you are just a control freak who will let idealized views of discipline get in the way of actually having a relationship with your children
Would be interesting to know how old you are and how many children you've raised to college age.
My job as your Father is to be your Father....not your best friend. My job is to do everything in my power to ensure that you grow into a prosperous and law abiding citizen. My job is to teach the difference between right and wrong, to listen to both sides of the argument, to respect your elders and understand that men have fought and died for you to have the opportunity to pursue happiness.
My job is to take you fishing, hunting, to throw the ball in the backyard. To provide a roof over your head, food on your plate and clothes on your back. My job is to provide you with medical attention when needed. My job is to teach you to defend yourself.
My job is to teach you to be true to your word, regardless of how much it inconveniences you. My job is to teach you to appreciate "opportunity", in whatever form it comes in. My job is to teach you to respect those men and women who have earned it.
My job is a lot of things, but being your buddy ain't one of them. My Father was never my buddy or my best friend, however we have a strong bond, speak almost everyday and I know that if and when I need him, I can count on him. He used to whack my backside when I failed to say "yes sir" and "no sir" to folks. He put a belt on my arse when I got out of line. It was all preparation for the future, my future.
This post was edited on 5/22/17 at 5:59 pm
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:13 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
I also require my children to answer all adults with yes sir, no sir, yes ma’am and no ma’am. No exceptions to the rule. If I ask them or tell them to do something, I better hear the proper response which is “yes sir”. Example, last night at the dinner table, I instructed my three boys to each put their paper napkin on. All three simultaneously replied, “yes sir”. I bellieve in good manners and discipline. I know it worked for my parents raising me and my brothers, too.
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:16 pm to TravisR
Random fricking thread to bump, Travis. Did your computer freeze last may?
This post was edited on 6/25/18 at 2:17 pm
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:17 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
Our daughter says sir/ma'am to us. More importantly she says it other ppl as well.
I never had to use it with my Yankee parents but I use it any way.
I never had to use it with my Yankee parents but I use it any way.
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:17 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
I never had to do that to my parents, but always to other adults.
I'm 30 and still use it for people older than me.
But if I ever said "yes sir" or "yes ma'am" to my parents, they'd think I was being a smartass
I'm 30 and still use it for people older than me.
But if I ever said "yes sir" or "yes ma'am" to my parents, they'd think I was being a smartass
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:18 pm to TH03
quote:
Did your computer freeze last may?
To be fair, those Windows updates take a long damn time.
This post was edited on 6/25/18 at 2:19 pm
Posted on 6/25/18 at 2:18 pm to OleWarSkuleAlum
So saying "yes daddy" is normal to her but "yes sir" is not? Well.. Is it different where she is from?
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