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re: Is having kids worth it?
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:13 am to TheDeathValley
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:13 am to TheDeathValley
quote:
To answer your question - yes, kids are amazing.
Some folks just arent parental material. I support them remaining childless.
Their kids will not be their priority, their carefree lifestyle is.
0
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:16 am to Epic Cajun
quote:
Yes, just know that 1 kid is way easier than 2
And two way easer than three
Surprise twins
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:17 am to Deuces
quote:
I’m married and undecided on wanting kids.
It is easy to put in words all the bad aspects of having kids, that is why you hear it so often. It is almost impossible to put into words the good things about having children, and they GREATLY outweigh the bad things.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:18 am to Deuces
quote:
Is having kids worth it?
YES. It is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:19 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
That ignores the “what kind of life can I afford to give to the kid”
I put this common topic in the same bucket as "who will take care of me" - I don't think either are usually genuine or compelling
The type of people who are going to be destitute because of children aren't considering those questions. They're just not. The type of people who say this are typically upwardly mobile, at least solid middle class types accustomed to a comfortable lifestyle, in my opinion.
I think most often it's a rationalization for people who are leaning against having kids and have doubts about that choice.
I think sometimes it's a genuine consideration, but "will my kid be able to do ____ that everyone else gets to do" and the like is, in my opinion, a silly way to think about a genuinely existential question. I've never never encountered a healthy child whose world doesn't adapt to their reality. A kid with loving, intentional parents but limited means is going to have a joyful childhood within the confines of the small world that children exist in.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:20 am to BottomlandBrew
This is 100 percent the best thing about it.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:21 am to Deuces
Only appropriate answer is ...YES.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:22 am to b-rab2
quote:
YES. It is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me
Wait until you get grandkids...
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:22 am to Deuces
No chance it is worth it. We decided against it and dont regret it for one second. Enjoy your money and time.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:25 am to Deuces
5 sons later I’d say hell yes!
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:25 am to Deuces
I have 4 and one on the way due in march so we will have 4 under 4. Very hectic and fun. Zero regrets. It's probably not for everyone and to each their own.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:25 am to Cliff Booth
quote:
I can only speak for myself, but the only thing I would change is I wish I had met my wife sooner and had our kids younger. Better chance of being a grandparent, etc.
Same. My wife and I are professionals who did professional school and then used our professional money to delay normal domestic life for a long time. A common story. One that almost caused us to miss out entirely. I can tell you that the months spent thinking we'd missed the boat were nothing short of absolute horror. Coming to grips with the idea that you may have squandered your chance for the thing you really wanted most while out having fun was pretty crushing. I can only imagine how it is for people who don't have a happy ending there and especially those who didn't get to that point via negligence (as we did).
I think I'm pretty well positioned to talk about this, as traditional-minded people who were in the middle of the DINK trap and almost didn't get out. I enjoyed all the traveling and carefree lifestyle we had, the things we got to do, etc. and I'm not ignorant of the reality that having both may skew this for me. But, it also allows me to compare both lifestyles, in a sense.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:25 am to nola tiger lsu
quote:
Enjoy your money and time.
Your money and time have more value to you with someone to care about and guide.
I suspect some folks just dont bond well with others, which leads to the desire for no kids.
I dont think its a character flaw, more a product of DNA. I imagine having kids would be miserable for them.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:26 am to gmrkr5
quote:
Mid 40’s, good careers, no kids. We have our reasons and are totally comfortable with our choices. We have the same amount of friends with kids as without. Everyone seems happy. Live your life
Exactly this. I'm sure people think it is a shame because we are stable people and it wouldn't be a financial burden, but it just isn't in the cards for us. That being said, I do not at all dislike kids, and I think people who behave that way are immature losers.
We have 5 godchildren that we love dearly, and we are happy to be the ones who spoil them.
Like you, easily 50% of our friends do not have kids and are mid 30s-mid 40s. Best of both worlds.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:28 am to Pettifogger
quote:
I think sometimes it's a genuine consideration, but "will my kid be able to do ____ that everyone else gets to do"
I am not talking about afford travel ball or trips to Disney, it’s can young married couples afford houses near good schools or private school.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:28 am to Deuces
For me, I have 2 sons...18 years apart...
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:32 am to Dire Wolf
quote:
I am not talking about afford travel ball or trips to Disney, it’s can young married couples afford houses near good schools or private school.
I get it - I don't think that's a genuine basis for the decision for most people. I think it's a throw in to try and ratify the direction they want to go.
The people who think like this are not going to put their kids in some violent hellhole of a school. And kids in a fine but unremarkable school aren't going to have any meaningfully negative impacts from it. They're never going to know the difference.
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:36 am to Deuces
quote:So much so that I have 6 (3/3), from the same spouse (no pics).
Is having kids worth it?
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:37 am to dyslexiateechur
quote:
Life would be pointless for me without kids.
Pointless seems a bit strong here. My wife and I aren't sure if health issues will ever allow us to have our own children but we still find value and meaning in the things we can do. We're able to spend the extra time we aren't spending on our own kids by investing in others, serving, volunteering, mentoring, etc. I get people being very pro-kids but sometimes it is a bit off-putting to hear folks tell me and my wife that our lives are basically pointless despite all the good things the Lord still blesses us with simply because we haven't had kids.
Had a lady (a karen really) tell us that we were hypocrites for claiming to be Christ followers because we were spitting in his face for not having kids. Didn't ask if we had health issues. Didn't ask if there were other circumstances and frankly, it wasn't her business anyway but we've had a good bit of people look down on us and question our morals for not. Super off putting tbh.
This post was edited on 12/10/25 at 10:46 am
Posted on 12/10/25 at 10:46 am to Codythetiger
quote:
She is really enjoying herself but when shes older and there is nobody there for her she will probably have regrets of being childless and single.
Obviously answers are going to be completely skewed if you already have kids or not but this is a situation I am seeing with my 70'ish year old parents and some of their friends that did not have kids. Their friends that either couldn't have kids or just said no are coming to the realization that they really don't have anyone to depend on. Not saying this needs to be a factor in deciding to have kids since even kids abandon their parents but it is something to consider.
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