re: I Have A Question About Unrequited Love

I’m in a similar situation with my current gf. She is great to me and we get along good but I don’t have that deep emotional love, the kind where if she did me wrong or left me I would be devastated. If she left I’d be over it in 2 days and go back to chasing sluts. Some days I want to be with her, some days I long for the single life.

But I’ve also been hurt bad in the past and I’m pretty much incapable of feeling that deep love for anyone anymore out of fear of being hurt again. So when doing my self reflection I just accept this is the way I am and I go with the logical solution

People don't realize feeling love is how the other person makes you feel. Being IN love is about how you make the other person feel.

Being in love requires action, that's why that verb thing is there. She is head over heels because she is acting it and making you feel something.

You're putting nothing into the relationship therefore you're getting nothing out of it.

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The reason the divorce rate is so high, and continuing to climb, is because people have changed their thinking on love. People today think love is an emotion, it isn’t. Love is a commitment. Love is a decision. No one “feels” in n love all the time, that’s where the commitment comes in. Your “friend” is no different than most today. He doesn’t deserve that woman.

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I think you’re right as far as the long term is concerned. But it definitely helps to have that initial spark of attraction, not just physical but also (maybe moreso) emotional. OP reminds me of an old girlfriend. Beautiful, nice and all around good but just kinda one dimensional personality. Just didn’t have that spark.

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More often than not the one who isn't feeling the same level of attraction has someone else in the back of their mind. Someone who they want and can't get to, and will hold on to any kind of thread that may be prevailing. They'll wait until that person either has a ring on their finger or married before they finally let go. Half assed relationships will be the norm while they try and fill the void/time because hey, if Jim and Pam somehow got together, we can too, right?

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Ahh now this is interesting. I wonder if there is someone in his past holding him back, possibly even subconsciously in his mind.

If so, what to do? Get him to recognize that’s gone and take his chance with a good woman? Or nothing you can do about something like this?

I wonder if he needs a nudge, a push. Or if it’s just something he has to resolve on his own.

Yea we’ve covered that.

Did you know Michael Bolton’s version is a cover and not the original?

Case in point of what I said - you’re over analyzing.