- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
re: How patient should you be in a relationship?
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:18 am to TulaneFan
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:18 am to TulaneFan
quote:
He also has a slew of medical problems (was born premature, had to be on an oxygen concentrator, multicystic kidney, bronco pulmonary dysplacia, failure to thrive).
That's your problem.
quote:
He was 1 pound when he was born and stayed in the NICU for 108 days. That was terrible for everyone to go through.
Again, this is your problem.
quote:
I just want the best for him, but I'm concerned he'll see how unhappy we are. Im trying to be patient but I the relationship with his mother has been a drag and I don't feel appreciated.
Why is it a drag? Here's the deal, Many women go through postpartum even that long after birth. Throw in a sick child and a mothers attachment to a child and you can have a lot of misunderstanding.
You have to be the man in the sense that she needs the understanding and the HELP. That's not me coming down on you because I'm not.
It's that whole thing of we are simple made differently no matter what we want to teach today. She may very well be a "drag" right now. But... you kinda had a "hand" in that. You "job" is to pull her through. That's the way things work.
0
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:19 am to TulaneFan
quote:
1 kid (2 year old son).
quote:
unmarried, but engaged (2018)
lol wut
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:24 am to TulaneFan
The fact that you have a kid together that is a toddler and you haven't married yet tells me that both of you are immature and scared of commitment. It's time to fish or cut bait. You're hurting the kid more by leaving everything in limbo.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:26 am to Eightballjacket
quote:
It's time to fish or cut bait.
Have not heard that statement in a very long time. My pop use to say "Piss or get off the pot"
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:29 am to TulaneFan
DNA test and leave no matter what the result is.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:31 am to Jjdoc
quote:
Have not heard that statement in a very long time. My pop use to say "Piss or get off the pot"
Tell someone that "it's time to fish or cut bait", and you can be pretty certain they'll be silent momentarily while they chew on that thought.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 12:34 am to Eightballjacket
Most don't have the ability to chew on thoughts.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 5:22 am to TulaneFan
quote:Yeesh. What a train wreck. You've clearly already made enough bad decisions up to this point. Maybe you should tread lightly moving forward.
3 year relationship. 1 kid (2 year old son).
ETA: unmarried, but engaged (2018)
Posted on 6/29/16 at 6:32 am to TulaneFan
Go see an excellent couples therapist.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 6:51 am to lsuwontonwrap
quote:
1 kid (2 year old son). unmarried, but engaged (2018)
quote:
lol wut
This. Cart before horse much? Y'all forfeited the right to the fancy white dress and tux party when you had a baby. Justice of the peace is where it's at.
That being said, work out your problems first.
1. Couples counseling. If you can afford this, talk to your pastor, your kids doctor, your doctor, someone.
2. Communicate with each other. Lay out goals and expectations. Set a budget. Define roles. Talk about what stresses you before it really aggravates you.
3. Get married at the J of P, have a family dinner or BBQ after to celebrate. Your kid would rather grow up in a household where his mom and dad laid down their lives for each other a lot more than he wants to be the ring bearer at his own parents' wedding.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 6:51 am to lsuwontonwrap
DP
This post was edited on 6/29/16 at 6:53 am
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:09 am to Hangit
quote:
I did not know the timeline and medical history before my last post. She was pregnant, then dealing with a majorly sick child for 33 months of your 36 month relationship. Due to logistics, you have no idea who she really is, nor she you. Y'all have never had the time to build a base for a proper relationship. The ongoing health concerns will consume most of the time you have to get things right. It is a tough situation but you should at least know her well enough by now to know if she is a quality human being. Have you tried giving her breaks from the pressures of life and seen if that makes a difference. Both you and her need some down time to recharge your batteries. Good luck.
Sound advice
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:32 am to YouAre8Up
Do people actually pay people to listen to them bitch about their SO?
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:35 am to TulaneFan
If it's shitty now, it will probably get shittier. Stop wasting each other's time.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:38 am to CorkSoaker
quote:
Go see an excellent couples therapist.
Of course this comes from a woman on this website.
Yea, lets drag someone else into this shitty relationship to become a referee. Get the frick out of here with this bullshite.
The worst thing for the kid would be growing up in a shitty household watching his parents fight. I don't know why people think "just be together and make it work, even if you're absolutely miserable, for the kids". Be yourself, be civil, provide and give the kid a good life.
To the OP, get the ring back and move on.
This post was edited on 6/29/16 at 7:40 am
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:43 am to TulaneFan
You two should have real discussions and talk about what is happening. One person in a supposedly co-op type scenario can't make or break it by them self. Get it on the table NOW. You are welcome.....
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:44 am to TulaneFan
quote:
ETA: unmarried, but engaged (2018)
have a 2 year old and a pending engagement 2 years from now? trying to wait until the kid can do the bible reading?
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:47 am to TulaneFan
Life is way too short to be miserable. You can still be a good Dad, and not be married to his/her mother. Truth be told you will be better overall without the stress and anxiety of the strained relationship. Good luck and happiness down the road.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:54 am to TulaneFan
3, years, one child, engaged in 2018??? WTF, in the future? She is tired of waiting around for your arse to get in gear. After all of this, both of you should walk away because it doesn't seem like you are made for each other. I would have been long gone. At this point she probably feels like nothing more than a "F" Buddy.
Posted on 6/29/16 at 7:55 am to CidCock
That is a unique excuse for waiting. GMAFB!!! Mother of the Bride should tell her to walk away now.
Page 3 of 5
Popular
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News