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Message
re: Having a birthday party every year for a dead baby
Posted on 9/11/15 at 9:54 am to fr33manator
Posted on 9/11/15 at 9:54 am to fr33manator
quote:
Maybe she doesn't want people to forget. some of y'all are goddamn heartless.
Write a god damn facebook poem, instagram your back baby foot tattoo.
0
Posted on 9/11/15 at 9:55 am to fr33manator
losing a child is the most devastating thing imaginable. You can never be yourself afterwards and you can never be normal.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 9:55 am to Jeaux Cool
quote:
try and move on
Move on?
This isn't some ex-girlfriend. This is your child. Your flesh ripped cruelly from you. It's not natural. '
It's not something you just "move on" from.
It eats at your soul every single day.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:01 am to Cosmo
You managed top the sadness of 9-11. Thanks.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:02 am to fr33manator
I'll tell ya, it will be 16 years in Dec. that my son died. There are three dates every year that I acknowledge (at least to myself). His birthday, his death day and the day he suffered brain damage, which started the whole thing. I feel like if I post something on FB, people are probably tired of that shite, but yet I feel like I can't let his birthday go without acknowledging something. So usually it's a cryptic "HBD MKD," and only people like my family and very close friends know what I'm doing.
I also have a sick sense of humor. I would love to post, "Happy Brain Damage Day!" every November 30th. That would freak people out, but it makes me laugh. Please understand that it's been a long time (brain damage when he was 6 months old, died when he was 16, would be 32 now) and I can make some jokes. Don't hate.
I also have a sick sense of humor. I would love to post, "Happy Brain Damage Day!" every November 30th. That would freak people out, but it makes me laugh. Please understand that it's been a long time (brain damage when he was 6 months old, died when he was 16, would be 32 now) and I can make some jokes. Don't hate.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:02 am to Cosmo
I have never lost a child, and I don't know how I would handle it. I don't even like to think about it. My parents lost a baby when I was young. I have 2 friends who have lost babies. One at birth and one 6 months old. They all grieved in different ways. One couple I feel grieves in a way that is unhealthy, but i don't feel it is my place to say anything. We all grieve differently. I pray I never experience what has to be the most awful experience imagined. Give your kids a big hug and tell them you love them always.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:03 am to Darla Hood
So sorry to hear that you lost your son, darla
My friend holds a St. Judes fundraiser every year. It's been about 5 years. She still posts about her sadness almost daily on fb. I don't think she'll ever recover
People are so different in how they handle things. My granddaddy made my aunt go right back to work. She is very well adjusted and normal seeming
My friend holds a St. Judes fundraiser every year. It's been about 5 years. She still posts about her sadness almost daily on fb. I don't think she'll ever recover
People are so different in how they handle things. My granddaddy made my aunt go right back to work. She is very well adjusted and normal seeming
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:03 am to Darla Hood
How did he suffer brain damage?
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:05 am to Cosmo
Damn, that's depressing. That has to be doing some serious damage inside her head
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:06 am to Darla Hood
People that haven't gone through it don't understand. They can't. They can't grasp the absolute hell it is.
And we all grieve in different ways. Cope In different ways.
It leaves a hole in your soul. A hole that will never be filled. And grass may grow over that hole, you may learn to step around it, to avoid it, but still sometimes you fall in that hole and it is as deep and dark as the date was formed.
And we all grieve in different ways. Cope In different ways.
It leaves a hole in your soul. A hole that will never be filled. And grass may grow over that hole, you may learn to step around it, to avoid it, but still sometimes you fall in that hole and it is as deep and dark as the date was formed.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:07 am to Darla Hood
quote:
People handle things so differently. I know of someone who not only kept their child's room exactly as it was, but when they built a new house, recreated that room. We, OTOH, dismantled our son's room rather quickly, and looking back, that was just strange and makes me feel bad. His wheelchair was donated within a week. I don't even know where my mind was.
You shouldn't feel bad at all. I know its not the same as losing a son, but when my dog passed I gathered up all her things quickly, minus a few special things, and gave them to people who could use them. She was and will always be near and dear to my heart, and it won't change just because I dont have her food, treats, toys etc. still around. A wheelchair is especially something that another could really use, so thank you for allowing another to utilize it. Your son is still there all the same.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:08 am to fr33manator
quote:
Who is she hurting exactly?
No one really, but I wouldn't want to be one of the people that has to turn down the invitation every year.
This post was edited on 9/11/15 at 10:26 am
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:09 am to tiggerthetooth
God I can't believe you compared your dog dying to losing a child
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:09 am to SabiDojo
He was sick for about three weeks and I brought him to the doctor six different times. Fever of unknown origin was pretty much it, until the third week, was finally diagnosed with a raging ear infection. Doctor considered hospitalizing him, but decided to give him antibiotic shots, instead. One on Monday morning, Monday night, Tuesday morning. He was better by Tuesday night, so he was cleared to go to the sitter and I went to work on Wednesday morning. Last time I saw him as a normal baby, he was laughing and smiling as I handed him to the sitter. Got a call at work at 11:00 am saying he was on his way to Lafayette General. Probably suffered a seizure, not sure, but he stopped breathing. Sitter's husband did CPR and he was bagged all the way to the hospital. Comatose for three weeks, but had suffered profound brain damage. Functioned like a newborn for the rest of his life. Also, cortically blind, which means he couldn't process anything visually.
Many, many what ifs. What if I'd stayed home? What if the doctor had hospitalized him? Etc.
Many, many what ifs. What if I'd stayed home? What if the doctor had hospitalized him? Etc.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:11 am to Paige
You seem much more sympathetic paige. That's good
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:12 am to Darla Hood
I'm so sorry. Reading that felt like a punch to the gut.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:14 am to Darla Hood
Omg that is heart breaking
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:14 am to fr33manator
quote:
I hope you never lose a child. You have no clue what sort of special hell that is.
I agree. Even if this does sound strange (It does) she deserves some slack here. We all grieve differently.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:15 am to Cosmo
quote:
I know we all grieve in our own way but this doesnt seem particularly healthy.
Have to agree. That's over the top
I have friends who'll post a facebook status with a picture of their dead child and people will post nice comments and such. I think that's about as far as people should go. It's healthy and not an "in your face" campaigns to force your close friends and family to grieve with you all over again every year.
I think I would just get obliterated drunk on the anniversary if alone, or I would bury myself in something family oriented with the remaining children.
Posted on 9/11/15 at 10:15 am to Cosmo
I like the donation idea!
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