GMT nsfw

Today in History: September 20
0480
Themistocles and his Greek fleet win one of history's first decisive naval victories over Xerxes' Persian force off Salamis.

1519
Ferdinand Magellan embarks from Spain on a voyage to circumnavigate the world.

1806
Explorers Meriwether Lewis and William Clark pass the French village of La Charette, the first white settlement they have seen in more than two years.

1863
Union troops under George Thomas prevent the Union defeat at Chickamauga from becoming a rout, earning him the nickname "the Rock of Chickamauga."

1952
Scientists confirm that DNA holds hereditary data.

1971
Hurricane Irene becomes the first hurricane known to cross from the Atlantic to Pacific, where it is renamed Hurricane Olivia.

1973
In a pro tennis bout dubbed "The Battle of the Sexes," Billie Jean King beats Bobby Riggs at the Houston Astrodome in Texas.

1984
Suicide car bomber attacks US embassy in Beirut, Lebanon, killing 22.

2001
US Pres. George W. Bush, addressing a joint session of Congress, declares a "war on terror.".

2011
US military ends its "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy and allows gay men and women to serve openly.

2019 Students from 185 countries stage the world's largest-ever protest on climate change culminating in Manhattan rally led by Greta Thunberg

2021 Pfizer announces they have developed a safe COVID-19 vaccine for 5-11 year olds with the dose 1/3 of the strength

Today in History: Born on September 20
1842
Lord James Dewar, physician who invented the vacuum flask and cordite, the first smokeless powder.

1920
Jay Ward, creator and producer of animated TV cartoons (Rocky & His Friends, renamed The Bullwinkle Show; George of the Jungle).

1934
Sofia Loren (Sofia Scicolone), first actress to win the Academy Award for Best Actress for a performance in a non-English language film (Two Women); received Cecil B. DeMille Award for lifetime achievements (1995).

1967
Kristen Johnston, actress; won two Emmy Awards as Sally Solomon in 3rd Rock from the Sun TV series.

JOTD
An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"
Long
"Of course child. What may I do for you?"

"Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?"

"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie."

"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you," she replied.

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"

"From the top of my head down to my waist I have nothing to declare."

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"

Father replied, "I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, which is, to date, unused."

Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father. Next please!"