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re: For those that thought divorce would be awesome..
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:23 pm to Count Chocula
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:23 pm to Count Chocula
0
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:23 pm to Tyga Woods
quote:
I believe we do a pretty good job of faking it for the kids.
Kids are extremely perceptive. Moods and vibes are very real things and kids pick up on them very easily.
quote:
we just kinda avoid each other.
Stop that. Make an effort to go to a ballet or read a stupid book or art class or whatever dumbshit woman thing she wants to do to facilitate time together. Or just tell her to frick herself because you'd rather play golf than talk to or spend time with her, and the most romantic thing you'll do is drop you pants and motion towards your dick while complaining that she won't frick you anymore.
As I've said before, Marriage is a brutal knockdown drag out heavy weight prize fight. Ask any fighter, it takes training, patience, persistence, and the ability to keep getting back up and trying again. When all said and done, it's definitely worth it, but it's not easy and it's not for everyone.
This post was edited on 12/15/16 at 12:26 pm
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:26 pm to Breesus
quote:
Breesus
Man I tell ya... In all honesty too... You have some real insight on this. Everything that you have posted has been SOLID, and real answers to things. Not sure if at some point you have experienced some of the said issues in marriage, but (not to get all mushy and girly and shite) you have inspired me to try a little harder in my OWN marriage.
I mean that in all sincerity
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:28 pm to Tyga Woods
Breesus was pretty spot on, but....
My wife and I had 3 kids, lived away from family, and there was a time she was pissy all the time.
Pretty much had to reconnect. ie date nights and asked friends to watch the kids. Plus she started having girls night out too where I dealt with the kids. Didn't take long for her to cool down. And the makeup sex was awesome. Especially after the girls night out.
My wife and I had 3 kids, lived away from family, and there was a time she was pissy all the time.
Pretty much had to reconnect. ie date nights and asked friends to watch the kids. Plus she started having girls night out too where I dealt with the kids. Didn't take long for her to cool down. And the makeup sex was awesome. Especially after the girls night out.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:29 pm to Tigeralum2008
I'd expect more like 1/3 of your money, things are more expensive than you think living apart. With 3 kids, you are still going to have less time than you think also.
I agree with the others, sounds like you need marriage counseling and you are unhappy with some bad habits she has formed that are fixable.
I definitely agree with Breesus in that you are not doing nearly what it takes to make her attracted to you also. Sounds like there has been some lost attraction, and a good part of that is on you not know what it takes to keep her attracted to you.
I agree with the others, sounds like you need marriage counseling and you are unhappy with some bad habits she has formed that are fixable.
I definitely agree with Breesus in that you are not doing nearly what it takes to make her attracted to you also. Sounds like there has been some lost attraction, and a good part of that is on you not know what it takes to keep her attracted to you.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:29 pm to Breesus
quote:
Stop that. Make an effort to go to a ballet or read a stupid book or art class or whatever dumbshit woman thing she wants to do to facilitate time together. Or just tell her to frick herself because you'd rather play golf than talk to or spend time with her, and the most romantic thing you'll do is drop you pants and motion towards your dick while complaining that she won't frick you anymore.
It doesn't get anymore truer than this
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:29 pm to LSUfanNkaty
quote:
Everything that you have posted has been SOLID, and real answers to things.
You obviously missed this little gem!
quote:
If you can't join, atleast try to watch.... From the closet.... Dressed as Superman.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:29 pm to Tyga Woods
quote:
I believe we do a pretty good job of faking it for the kids. She doesn't project her anger towards them. It's mostly to the point where unless we are discussing our kids, or having a conversation with them at the table or something like that, we just kinda avoid each other.
OP, I was in the same situation as you but I divorced after 11 years and 2 kids.
I offered counseling but she would not follow the advice and eventually declined to attend future sessions.
I'd reccomend you offer counseling and also make it a regular habit to "date" your wife again. See if those hurts and resentments can be healed
My marriage ended because we grew into two completely incompatible people as we got older. If you think that is NOT the case in your situation then you should try to fix things before pulling the plug.
This post was edited on 12/15/16 at 12:31 pm
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:30 pm to Steadyhands
Actually, things were pretty good up until the last few years. Something changed...not sure if it is me, her, or a combination of the two of us. I don't necessarily want to bail on my marriage. I would prefer to stay together and things be great. Just trying to get opinions from others that have been through it.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:30 pm to Tyga Woods
7 years after my divorce I am very successful and love it. Don't miss my crazy ex have great relationship with my 3 kids and I am back on my feet financially again. BTW that wife is probably cheating on you anyway. Drop that chicken dinner and get with a winner, yourself.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:31 pm to LSUfanNkaty
quote:
Man I tell ya... In all honesty too... You have some real insight on this. Everything that you have posted has been SOLID, and real answers to things.
Occasionally, I will try not to be a dick. Just occasionally.
quote:
Not sure if at some point you have experienced some of the said issues in marriage,
I stayed at a holiday Inn last night.
I also am Jesuit educated. So I just know a butt load of crap about everything.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:32 pm to Count Chocula
quote:
You obviously missed this little gem!
quote:
If you can't join, atleast try to watch.... From the closet.... Dressed as Superman.
Well.... Touche sir
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:34 pm to Tyga Woods
I did it.
I got primary custodial rights as well and she pays me child support.
It still sucks only having my kids every two weeks. Running around like a crazy person on holidays bc we split them.
I was drowning in it though. Chicks throw panties at single dads.
I would do it again based of the situation I was in but it still sucks for my kids and it's been 3 1/2 years.
I got primary custodial rights as well and she pays me child support.
It still sucks only having my kids every two weeks. Running around like a crazy person on holidays bc we split them.
I was drowning in it though. Chicks throw panties at single dads.
I would do it again based of the situation I was in but it still sucks for my kids and it's been 3 1/2 years.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:34 pm to CaptainsWafer
quote:
You may have 2/3 of income, but you'll be without at least half of whatever it is you currently have.
This is why the current court system is so fricked up. it's unbelievable that we let this shite happen. People are staying in shitty arse marriages and damaging their children because they know the courts are gonna rape them dry for their money
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:35 pm to Count Chocula
That's probably the best piece of advice in this thread
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:35 pm to Breesus
quote:
I also am Jesuit educated
St. Louis CH is better...
quote:
So I just know a butt load of crap about everything.
This is what I pictured reading this...
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:39 pm to Tyga Woods
Dude. Honesty. Brutal fricking honesty is the answer. Sit her down, tell her how you feel and come together. Or find out she is cheating.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:39 pm to Blob Fish
quote:
Live with your decision for the kids
this just doesn't work the way many think it does.
if the kids can see how bad things are, then separating is likely better for them.
I speak from experience; there is nothing worse than living in a household with parents who are constantly arguing. Kids aren't dumb.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:44 pm to Tyga Woods
Go back in time. I was engaged for 12 years. Thank god LA doesn't have common law.
Posted on 12/15/16 at 12:44 pm to LSUfanNkaty
No shite, That's the movie I was quoting. I love Nacho Libre
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